Getting Bi: Voices of Bisexuals Around the World by Robyn Ochs

Getting Bi: Voices of Bisexuals Around the World Reviews

• 
  Haleigh

  I really admire the editors' dedication to showcasing diverse voices in this anthology. They have collected essays from 42 countries, with contributors of different ages, religions, educational backgrounds (etc.), who come from all across the gender spectrum, and their stories reflect this huge variety of experience. Robyn Ochs and Sarah Rowley have created a sort of quilt that captures the immense diversity within the bisexual experience while also highlighting some of the common threads, like grappling with labels, coming out, and finding (or not finding) community.
• 
  Tobi

  The book came out in 2005, but I wrote my piece in it in 2003. As you can imagine, my thoughts on sexuality have shifted over the years. But I'm still happy that I got the chance to put forth questions of internalized biphobia, wanting to call myself queer instead of bi, and just not liking or fitting a sexual orientation binary.
  
  The book itself has over 100 contributors from 32 different countries and deals with many many different perspectives and experiences of being bi.
• 
  Stefanie

  A great place to start to learn about bisexuality - especially if you like to learn via people's personal stories and hear it told in their voices. There's also a great few essays and list of resources at the end, including a guide for parents of young people who come out as bisexual and a list of fiction with bisexual characters.
  
  Granted, this book is a bit dated now (originally 2005; even the update is 2009) so lots has changed, at least within the US. At this point it's a window on a certain cultural time in addition to the obvious focus on a sexual orientation. But much still holds true. The perspective is pretty heavily American but there's still enough from other countries, including those in Africa, Asia and South America, that provides a taste of the experience in different cultures.
  
  My reading experience of this was like it is with a collection of short stories - most of it was good, some did nothing for me, and a few nuggets gave that amazing feeling of "Yes! I identify with this." Overall such an important effort.
• 
  Christina Hannan

  This was a eye-opening and heartfelt read, and I’m so glad I picked it up from my local library. It went into detail about the lives and struggles of bisexuals around the world and how they dealt with the issues of activism, politics, self-acceptance and the importance of community. It was so enlightening to read about how other bisexuals viewed their identity and lived their truth. I can’t tell you how many times I cried reading someone’s story because it resounded so deeply with me. I really felt as if this book was a must read and I’m so glad I picked it up.
• 
  Sarah

  Wonderful collection of short autobiographical essays on bisexual issues. It gives a wonderful worldwide perspective that challenges the predominant Western and American biases in our movement. Also comes with a wonderful resource guide.
• 
  Jennifer

  It was fascinating to read the different perspectives of bisexuals around the world. I would highly recommend it to anyone.
• 
  Jan

  I enjoyed the first edition of this book (which I was not in), but (naturally) I enjoyed the second edition of it (which I am in) even more. I was particularly interested by the large number of new personal narratives from bisexual people in countries other than the U.S., Canada and Britain, where the majority of the original pieces came from. Most of these people aren't writers, but their stories are still illuminating. If you're bisexual, have a bisexual friend or family member you want to understand, or just want to know more about your fellow human-beings, this is a good resource.
• 
  Kate

  A great anthology of bi voices from around the world. I found some sections a little drier than others, and the downside to an anthology is that the writing pieces are all shorter than I traditionally like. On the flipside, this was a great book to read on my fifteen minute coffee breaks at work (which is why it took me almost two months to read it). Some entries had me nodding along with every word, but other entries had me angry, or going "what?! seriously?" But that is the varied scope of bisexuality. Some people will have very similar perspectives, and others will have very different perspectives. Even experiences that a very different than mine are still valid. Lots of great resources in the back of the book, too.
• 
  Tiff

  I liked aspects of this book, and it was definitely interesting to see so many different viewpoints.
• 
  Sabrina Haenze

  Much of the terminology is very outdated, but the personal stories are all very interesting.
• 
  Laura

  This book came out in 2009 and is a collection of essays about what it’s like to be bisexual. Each chapter asks a specific question in regards to it and shows an array of different view points. In general I don’t know what I expected this book going in but I enjoyed it. One general thing that I found to be hindering my enjoyment were the many different points of view. In the one hand I loved to read about them on the other hand it did become a little repetitive from time to time, which is understandable since all had been given the same prompts.
  Most of those view points I found to be interesting and engaging. Some had me wavering of, some people I absolutely couldn’t connect with and found to be off putting. Is that a bad thing? I don’t think so. It just shows that everyone has different perceptions and that sometimes you meet or read about people in that case that for some reason you don’t end up enjoying your time with.
  I did really appreciate seeing the essays from people outside of the US since I am one of them. Some of the terminology that was being used is considered to be very outdated at this point in time, once again nothing about this is negative, I just feel like it could be good for some people to know these things before going in. I don’t want anyone to feel wrong about it.
  Lastly I just want to close of this review by highlighting my favorite essay in this collection. Interestingly enough it turnt out to be the first one that the collection starts of with. It made me feel a lot and I certainly teared up reading it.
• 
  Highlyeccentric

  as a book overall, I don't think the tiny-quotes-and-contributions format worked well; it read like a bizarrely large pamphlet. However, it was pretty nifty reading up on 90s bi... everything; slightly disappointing to think how little has changed; and the last few sections, on politics, were very interesting, especially when some of the authors had fine-tuned their ideas since 'Closer to home: Bisexuality and feminism'.
• 
  Shane

  This book involved a lot of different voices on various topics which is good in theory but in practice it was such small snippets of people’s experiences that they ended up being very similar. There was never enough meat to really connect with. Also it felt more like a book to explain bisexuality to people than a book for bisexuals.
• 
  Robyn Ochs

  Disclaimer: I'm one of the two editors, and I'm still in love with this project.
• 
  Lisa Gamboa

  The book is a little too surface level for what I was looking for, but some of the testimonies were eye opening and extremely touching.
• 
  Emily

  An interesting collection of bisexual stories from around the world. It was a little tiring reading so many very short stories that shared common themes. Maybe if the the stories had been a bit more curated, they would have kept my attention more, but I stuck with it through the end and I’m glad I did because the final chapter, about views of bisexuality in different countries/cultures, was the most interesting. A good read for anyone who’s bi and hasn’t heard many bi stories before.
• 
  kris

  Definitely a book better suited for those unfamiliar with bisexuality than those who are. For those who are, there may be very little to find within its pages.
• 
  Nimrodds

  זה ספר מאוד חשוב ומקיף, כדאי לקרוא אותו, להשגה כספר אלקטרוני
• 
  kory.

  “People are becoming not only increasingly willing to embrace identities that cross lines, but also immensely creative and playful in their use of terms and labels. Some identify as queer, pansexual, or omnisexual. Some publicly acknowledge attractions and/or relationships with people of more than one sex while simultaneously claiming the right to identify as heterosexual, lesbian or gay. Some deliberately use labels strategically, identifying differently in different social contexts. And some eschew labels altogether. In fact, as we debated possible titles, we considered subtitling this book ‘Voices of Bisexuals and Other Folks Along the Sexuality Spectrum,’ recognizing that the word bisexual cannot possibly encompass all whose identities challenge the binaries of gay and straight. Although brevity eventually won out in the title, we want this book to be a safe and nourishing haven not only for those who identify as bisexual, but for everyone.”

  
  
  i very much prefer bi books that are focused on history, community, politics, stuff like that. when the personal stories and details of sex lives come into play, i start to lose interest. this book had a bit of both, but i still wish there had been less of the personal stuff. (that doesn’t make this book bad, just not really my taste).
  
  this one is less binary than others, but definitely still super binary. and yes, another case of “regardless of gender” language being used in the context of men and women. and there’s a section on politics that includes a “bisexual manifesto” that isn’t the text from “anything that moves" which goes to show that tacking the word “manifesto” onto something doesn’t mean it’s universally revered or even known among the group it pertains to.
  
  i definitely have some......notes.
  
  i don’t agree with the idea that one can be described as bisexual based on their behavior or attractions even if they don’t identify as bisexual. i’m a self-identification over everything person. the names we give ourselves are more important than any concept of innate or inherent labels based on any criteria that others subscribe to. it’s as simple as: don’t call people words they don’t claim for themselves, and don’t disregard the words they do claim for themselves in preference to the words you’d rather call them.
  
  i think it’s....let's go with.....interesting how a bunch of bi people in this book described their attraction with things that panphobes use as examples of pan people being ~problematic and ~biphobic. but i’m sure it’s okay when bi people say it, and when pan people say it it’s bad or “proof” of us stealing from bi people. even though we came from the same community, so of course our language is sometimes shared. gag me.
  
  lastly, there’s a quote from a queerphobic, identity policing article from the ’80s in the quotes section of the book. the article argues that “bisexuals who don’t call themselves bisexuals” (if they don’t call themselves bi, why are you?) are damaging the bi community’s visibility and progress by not identifying as bi, and makes assumptions and generalizations about why they don’t identify as bi. it’s a harmful article and i don’t appreciate it being included in a book claiming to support all mspec people and self-identification.
  
  i get that there are a lot of different perspectives represented in this book, some that directly contradict one another, but this quote was plucked out of the ’80s to be included by the editors. while the article claims to support self-identification and doesn’t want to become the label police, they quite literally follow that disclaimer with “until more people identify as bi, the bi community and movement will be stymied” and i’m sorry, but it’s not my (or other non-bi mspec people’s) responsibility or duty to use our identities and existence strategically to “grow” the bi community/movement.
  
  we don’t have to identify based on what movement/community needs “growing”, and us not identifying as bi is not damaging or stalling bi progress. that’s guilt tripping and shaming people for their right to self-identify, instead of labeling themselves based on what community wants more numbers. you want your community to grow? do the work to make it more visible and accessible so those who actually are bi can realize, accept, embrace that. don’t shame, attack, or guilt other mspec people for not identifying as bi, or use them as a scapegoat for your disappointment in your own community/movement.
  
  basically, learn the difference between those who aren’t identifying as bi due to internalized biphobia or a lack of access to bisexuality, and those who aren’t identifying as bi because they just aren’t bi, and then be very fucking careful to not conflate the two anymore.
• 
  Keith Costelloe

  I read this book to research bisexual voices. It is non-fiction and has statements from both men and women who consider themselves bisexual. The stories in and of themselves are interesting and the ease or difficulties they had in their lives relating to others and coming to terms with their sexuality is always fascinating. The book describes how bisexuals are viewed and examines the term itself and what it means. Some of the people talk about sexuality being fluid, and that we shouldn't box people into categories. Sexual attraction depends on who you are attracted to. It is a well-researched book and opens up an area of sexuality that isn't well understood or talked about with any knowledge.
• 
  Rachel Liebler

  A great book of stories from many different people with different backgrounds voicing their experience being bisexual which is super helpful and validating. A gift from a friend that I an very grateful for 💖
• 
  Z.

  I was not a big fan of this book. It had some interesting personal accounts, reflections, essays, poems and stories from bisexuals. However, after the first few pages the redundancy was unbearable. There is definitely room for variety. Also, you could tell the author was struggling to get submissions. Some of the testimonials were only a few lines of stories already told.
  What I did like about this book was that there were stories from bisexuals representing different countries around the world. There is also some good resources and guides.
  
  I believe there is a second edition coming out. I think it will be better.