| Title | : | The Bucket List |
| Author | : | |
| Rating | : | |
| ISBN | : | - |
| Language | : | English |
| Format Type | : | Kindle Edition |
| Number of Pages | : | 153 |
| Publication | : | Published October 29, 2022 |
A night of puns, quips, and brutal violence, hosted by the sweet, mad, elderly Marge and Alby.
If you're a fan of Horror/comedy, give this one a go and cross it off your bucket list. But be warned, there will be blood. Buckets of it.
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“Towse & Healy take the lovely charm of a quaint bed and breakfast, staff it with an elderly couple with peculiar tendencies, add several wayward guests, then unleash a night of blood-soaked terror upon them. Incredibly well-written, expertly paced, and filled with perfectly plausible reasons to NOT put a bed and breakfast on your Bucket List.” -Candace Nola, author of Bishop
The Bucket List Reviews
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3.5 stars. This was pretty good, but I didn’t love it. The story took quite awhile to find its flow, with the earlier portions dragging quite a bit. There were some genuinely unsettling interactions with Alby and Marge and the couples who, unfortunately, found themselves at their dreadful B&B. This helped things along to the eventual point where business picked up. How did it pick up, you ask? Why with plenty of violence, chaos, and lots of running, of course. A perfect trio, if you will. Once that started, through the ending, the story was a lot of fun. It just took awhile to get there. I don’t have any specific critiques to put across, but maybe reducing the introductions of each couple a bit, and speeding along the initial meeting with Alby and Marge may have helped. I have never read anything from Chisto Healy, but am very familiar with Mark Towse, who I highly regard as a colleague in our beloved horror community. If you haven’t read my favorite book of his, Nana, yet, you need to do so immediately.
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If you like horror novellas, pick this book up now! A B&B in the middle of nowhere, run by an elderly couple, is the setting of this delightfully bizarre horror-comedy that keeps you on your toes (erm!) from the get-go. Quaint, bloody, gory, maybe even disgusting at times, it’s a book that had me squinching and laughing throughout, often at the same time.
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Fantastic story!
Not what I was expecting at all but it was a heck of a story! It went from a little creepy to Holy Heck what's going on??!! in no time. I loved it. The characters were fun, the plot captivating and an absolute blast to read. -
This was wild and disgusting and it was AWESOME.
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Horror Bookworm Reviews
The Bucket List by Mark Towse & Chisto Healy
https://horrorbookwormreviews.com/
Marge and Alby manage a quaint Inn called Beatrice’s Bed and Breakfast. The old and fragile husband/wife team welcome the new guests with open arms as travel plans are put on hold for two couples attempting to find shelter from an approaching storm. The black clouds of unsuspecting doom gather outside as well as inside the B&B for all those involved. Let the sinning begin.
Releasing directly from The Evil Cookie Publishing, authors Mark Towse and Chisto Healy have collaborated on a disturbing piece of dark fiction entitled The Bucket List. The bizarre personalities that exist within these pages are a testament to Towse & Healy’s unpredictable writing style. Their continuous layers of ominous storytelling quickly become a graphic representation of what is to come. These unsettling explicit acts of savagery lie behind the facade of a self proclaimed World’s Greatest Grandma. Have you ever had that feeling that something is just not quite right, but you just can’t put your severed finger on it?
The Bucket List is a collision course of animalistic psychopaths and the carnal mode for survival. Think of The Visit meets Misery meets Wrong Turn. Anxiety, desperation and claustrophobia are a constant running theme throughout this emotional charged story of flesh filleted terror. Make no bones about it, the goosebump factor will be a significant amount for the reader to handle. It can fling the splatter poo with the best of ‘em.
Read the Yelp reviews and beware the Vacancy sign, or you too may find yourself praying to whoever might be listening as you begin your descent into an overnight stay. Mi casa es su casa has now taken on a brand new brutal meaning within the extreme horror community. A five star ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Horror Bookworm Recommendation that includes a chocolate on your panic-stricken pillow. -
Book Review ✨The Bucket List by Mark Towse and Chisto Healey
If you like horror and comedy, plus lots of blood, check out The Bucket List. The setting is absolutely perfect. A “quaint” motel in the middle of nowhere run by two eccentric and may I say “odd” elderly people. Talk about creepy!
The story follows two couples, Judy and Chris and Melody and Richie. Both couples have their own reasons for stopping at the motel, run by Marge and her doting, husband Alby. (Albert) but one thing is for fact, a night of hospitality will end in living hell.
The writing pulls you in with anticipation. The atmosphere and foreshadowing builds from the very beginning leaving a tense feeling in the air. Characters are well rounded and interesting and the plot is straight up fun! Let’s not forget, if you happen to have a funny bone in your skeleton, you’ll love the quips and bits of humor.
One thing is for certain, the bits about toes in this story really got to me, giving me body horror to the max. I also dig how the authors would use certain words to “trigger” flashbacks to some of the more gruesome parts. I don’t know if that was intentional or not but kudos to you both for skeeving me out.
Find out who gets to check off their bucket list! -
“Like the geriatric terminator.”
This is some of the weirdest sh!t I’ve read…er, a…listened to. Thanks to Mark for sending me a copy to check out. It was a grand ol time 😬😂🤣
So this audiobook is quite a production with an excellent narrator and pops of sound effects, which added an extra layer of entertainment. Just be careful where you listen to it because there are random screams, screeches and gunshots. I don’t recommend reading it while behind the wheel…
This one is about an elderly couple (Marge and Albert/Albie) who are running a bread and breakfast. They are quirky, demented and crass….it’s the type of place no one in their right mind would want to stay.
Marge is a “worlds greatest grandma”apron wearing, nuttier than a squirrel turd old lady trying to help her beloved check all the items on his bucket list. She creeped me tf out. They both did but she was just next level.
If you find yourself being easily offended by sexual situations, curse words, gore or insults at the elderly…maybe skip this one. It’s chock full of them. 😂🤣
This book is both hilarious and disturbing. Can we please make this into a gore-fest horror movie!? -
“Meat. That’s all we are, Judy. Just walking, talking, slabs of meat, and being any better than anyone else depends only on how we’re cooked.”"
⭐⭐⭐⭐💫
Told from the perspectives of Chris, a newly retired accountant, his wife Judy, Ritchie, a death metal rocker, and his girlfriend Melody, The Bucket List is a comedy horror novel that will make you think twice about stopping for the night at that Bed and Breakfast you just passed a few miles back.
Come for the novelty of an all pink BNB and stay for the brandy and meat pies at Beatrice's BNB. What's that wet sensation on your toes you ask? Oh that's just Alby, you didn't think you were the only one with a bucket list to check off, did you? Ah, yes and here comes Margie, the World's Greatest Grandma. But where's Beatrice you ask? Guess you'll have to stay the night to find out.
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The thought of staying at a place in the middle of nowhere where someone could possibly torture and murder me *shudders* is one of my biggest fears. Like I would never randomly say "ooo look at that cute place all by itself let's stay there. Surely nothing bad will happen to us". No I would never say that. I've read too many books and watched too many movies and I KNOW bad stuff is about to happen there. And The Bucket List just solidified that feeling even more for me.
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Anyway, this is one of my favorite horror tropes and this story was great. If you liked the movie Frontiers (2007) or if you enjoy the 'surely nothing bad will happen to us in this sketchy place' plotline, cannabalism or weird old people then this one's for you.
Thank you to Chisto Healy and Mark Towse for the opportunity to visit the animal farm in exchange for a review! I look forward to reading more from each of you in the future! -
Another excellent book from the mind of Mark Towse, and also Chisto Healey, who is new to me. Two couples end up in a B&B that's run by some... uh... let's say 'unconventional' folk. The perfect blend of dark humour and horror, with an excellently paced plot, and some truly horrifying (yet somehow sometimes comical) scenes makes for one of the most enjoyable reads so far this year.
The characters are excellent - in that they're written so well you can really see them as you're reading, which obviously makes the story all the more engaging. It's also worth noting that the way the writers blended their styles is seamless - I couldn't tell where one writer ended and the other began, which is a testament to both their talents and the hard work they clearly put in. I don't know if they were emulating each other's styles, or passing chapters back and forth and rewriting them, or what, but I'm always really impressed when two authors are able to pull off a story that feels like it was written by one person.
Highly recommend this book, it's great fun! -
I went into this book blind and did not expect this type of experience. Part Misery, part Texas Chainsaw Massacre, this book was uneasy and disturbing and I could NOT put this down!
The writing style pulls you in, though I didn't know what to think when I read the first chapter. Then as you creep further and further into the book, it feels like there's a ticking time bomb counting down the seconds until the sh!t hits the (proverbial?) fan. And boy does it.
Tons of action, suspense, violence, and gore is packed into this bite-sized package that can be read in one sitting. Definitely check this out for a fast-paced, blood-soaked, geriatric ride! -
With a storm brooding on the horizon, two couples find themselves checked into Beatrice’s Bed & Breakfast. A quiet place in the middle of nowhere run by a bizarre elderly couple named Marge and Alby. What they all have in common is to check things off their bucket list. But what these guests don’t realize is that their hosts are hiding a very dark secret. And when meal time comes around, they’re about to find out what Marge and Alby have left to check off their very own bucket list…
Horror fans are in for a treat with The Bucket List! It was an unexpected and delightful little horror story that checked all the right boxes for me. It had a creepy atmosphere of a storm and the sense of being trapped in a strange place and featured two unpredictable and creepy antagonists. Mix that with moments of suspense, dark humor and buckets of blood and gore and you’ve got yourself a perfect horror tale that delivers all the goods. Towse and Healy managed to write a story together that flowed seamlessly and I couldn’t tell who wrote what, I think they were the perfect tag-team for this 👌
I feel like the fun of reading is not really knowing how things would turn out and so I don’t like to go into full details in my reviews. But if you enjoy horror, The Bucket List is worth checking in for a visit to get your dose of gut-churning gore and laughs in one neat package. And if you ever find yourself at an actual B&B just look for the telltale signs of half eaten chocolates and all too pink walls 😉
4.5/5 toes! -
After finishing “Hopes Wharf,” by Towse last night, I was immediately craving more. Without wasting any time, I purchased this and tore my way through it in one sitting. I literally couldn��t put it down. The pacing, the tension, the characters; it all just worked. With moments of humor, charm, uneasiness and down right brutality, this story is a wild ride. I’m not familiar with Healy’s work but after reading this, I’ll definitely be diving in to more. My final verdict is that this is a basically a love story and we’d all be so lucky to find someone who loves us the way Marge loves Alby (just kidding) (but also maybe not?)
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"Some real rock n roll shit."
This one was wild, if you like comedy/horror, it's right up your alley. Both of these authors are amazing. Funny, horrific and of course, full of blood. Remind me not to stay at a bed and breakfast anytime soon, or ya know ever. -
From the opening scene, I thought I'd picked up the wrong book!😉
It kicks off with a tender moment between our main characters Albert and Margaret, or Alby and Marge as they will be fondly known to you, as they become more familiar and loveable. They have an extra special kind of bond between them…. one that quickly makes you realise that yes, you are indeed reading the correct book! 😂
Chris and Judy are the first to arrive at Beatrice's B&B, where they are warmly welcomed by Alby & Marge, a rather 'quirky' couple, who are quick to settle their guests in and get dinner on the table. Chris wants to feel the freedom of adventure again after his retirement, and he has a list of things he would like to do….
Richie and Melody are next to arrive at the B&B, also keen to cross off items on their own list, chasing the adrenaline rush they crave! Richie's motto being, "I've never done it!" And then proceeding to do whatever 'it' may be! He will experience lots of new things on his stay at the B&B….
Alby's bucket list is different from the others, he knows he's not long for this world, so his list, is a bit more specialised! And Marge is kindly going to help make sure he fulfills everything on it….and more!!
All three couples have very different lists, but which of them will be fulfilled?? They chat about their wishes and dreams over a HIGHly entertaining meal and a few drinks, after which, it's time for some games at Beatrice's B&B….
But just who is Beatrice?? And where is she??
You get a sinister sense of fun right from the beginning, pure unadulterated insanity, that starts off entertaining and humorous and gets progressively more unhinged as the story unfolds. Hilarious and with a great build up of mystery and intrigue from the start, this is one B&B you don't want to stay in. Less Bed & Breakfast and more Bed & Brutality!! Oh, and I advise you don't take them up on the breakfast in bed option! Or the all you can eat "self" serve buffet!
The suspense and foreboding make for a heart stopping read! Toe curling, horrific, barbaric, chilling, disturbingly graphic and fucked up! The savage showdown at the end was engrossing and utterly wild! I kinda want to be a fly on the wall but I wouldn't want to stay too long!!
Extreme/splatter fans, you will love this fantastically fun and disturbing read! I suggest you reserve your room before they are fully booked! 🖤 -
There are certain things in life that just fill you with a level of unease. The things that shouldn’t are usually the worst. If I was walking through the woods in July and heard joyous Christmas music, you know i’m walking that little bit faster!
This is not the first time I’ve felt uncomfortable in a bed and breakfast and I hope it won’t be my last.
The writing here was great and while it’s sold as comedy/horror that would definitely be misleading. There are plenty of funny moments here sure, but that’s really in the style of writing. Don’t come here looking for a slapstick horror book, you will be left pretty unsettled.
I absolutely powered through this novella and didn’t realise the page count as it flowed so smoothly. The pacing was perfect, the characters wonderful and the grotesquery was on point.
Bone app the teeth. -
What a doozy The Bucket List was!
I read a good section in the living room while my husband and kids watched a football game (go Lions). My gasps and gags had Jeff asking if I was okay while the kids giggled at my dramatics.
This story was delightfully disgusting. An all pink bed and breakfast in BFE, a comical cast of characters, and body horror that had me regretting my choice to eat meat lover’s pizza while I read… if this sounds up your alley, grab and devour your own copy. You might regret it, but I sure didn’t.
My advice? Next time you travel, opt for a hotel. 🏠
Cheers to a horrifically good time! 🍷 -
I found it. The book that actually gave me a nightmare. I didn’t think it was possible, but this was terrifying.
The sense of unease that this book put out was fantastic. My heart was racing the entire time. I honestly almost did not go back to finish it, but I’m glad that I did.
The writing was witty and really funny at some parts. It made you feel really bad for laughing though. I cared about each of the characters and they were super fleshed out for a short story.
If your stomach can handle this, I highly recommend! -
Excellent! comedy horror at its best!
The first half, as we get to know the flawed but relatable characters is full-on, fast paced laugh out comedy. And throughout, the suspense just builds and builds until... The second half where it gets dark, dirty and delicious. The pacing never lets up even through the story’s final showdown.
Adding this to my list of favourite horror novellas to date. Highly recommended! -
This was quite the wild ride. I went in blind and did not expect it to go in the direction it went. Creepy at times and funny at others, this was a blast to read.
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An entertaining, quick read! Laughed out loud at points and grossed out at others.
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I always found bed and breakfasts creepy as hell, but this book. Oh boy! Two couples stay at a UK bed and breakfast with an obviously insane man and woman host. Things get nasty quickly, and the ending is great.
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Video Review
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pX3VU... -
Two fine gentlemen, Mr Mark Towse and Mr Chisto Healy, shared their own version of 'The Bucket List' and in a way, made me redraft mine (right on my wedding anniversary).
This is a story about love, relationships, weekend getaways at B&Bs and bucket list checkboxes demanding to be checked off.
It's all couples goals and bucket lists but when B&B stands for Bed and Bontage then things take a wild, bizarre and dangerous turn.
Because the couples that decide to spend some 'us time' in this cosy little B&B in the country, would probably expect the sausages to be undercooked, but not to be in the sausages... (and I will leave it up to here because I don't want to plant spoilers)
Enter a story that builds up the tension and forecasts the devastating doom that's about to follow, right from the very first sentences. With a strong 1st chapter and scenes that will make some male readers squirm, the story takes off to a high speed crash trajectory with tragedy and mayhem.
This is gory and anxiety inducing horror prinkled with enough stabby, beautiful and intelligent puns and one-liners ('Knickers the size of a small parachute') to make you snap out from the dreadful situations the masterfully crafted characters are in. Trust me, the characters make all the difference in this one. (Just think Alby as the Small hand from Scary movie...)
The story begs to be shot in film as the whole premise comprises of cinematic sequences of brilliantly directed horror shots that slowly set up the backdrop for the doom that's about to follow and pulls you in a living nightmare. Just think that you are trapped in films such as 'Psycho', 'Texas Chainsaw Massacre', 'Speak no Evil (Danish film) ', 'Old People', 'Wrong Turn', 'Hostel' and well 'Wolf Creek' with a little 'The Visit' thrown in.
But, in the midst of blood, guts, pink decorations, severed toes and butcher knives, you cannot but feel the love between the couple's members. Love that swings from pure to sickening and disturbing and adds tear jerking drama to the melting pot of feelings that come along with the comedy and dread.
A phenomenal literary horror diamond and a prime example of how the horror genre can be entertaining, versatile and bloody beautiful.
One that found a solid place in my top 3 for the year.
Get this book now. Now that is fresh.
Fresh is best. Ooh-oh, ah ah. -
"Think, Judy, MacGyver this f*****! Like the original, not that crappy reboot either. Be like Hannibal with a random garage, five minutes, and the A-Team van."
Ever think about all the things you'd like to do once you retire? My husband and I often talk about all the things we want to do once he retires, and our kids are grown. The first thing up on our list is to visit the Grand Canyon. There are other things of course and even if we never get to all of them, it's nice to just think about enjoying like together as we get older.
However, although this book is about 3 couples that all have bucket lists, they each have very different lists. Especially the bed and breakfast owners, Marge and Albert. Things go from somewhat stranger, to even more strange, to downright deadly.
This book will definitely have you rethinking taking a vacation to your local bed and breakfast. I myself, have never been to one and now I'm not sure I ever will. There is just something about staying in what is essentially someone's home that has never really interested me.
The characters are relatable, well the two sane couples anyway. The setting is described very well and even though I love pink, it being my favorite color, the way this house is described, I would hate it. The writing is well paced, and the chapters are short which makes it for an easy read. I was able to read it in one afternoon. This is my first read by Chisto Healy, but if this story is any indication, I will definitely be checking out more from him. Beware though, blood, guts and flying body parts are more than a possibility when you stay at Beatrice's Bed and Breakfast. -
Humor and horror really should not be two things that work well together, and yet...
Some authors just seem to be able to make it work.
Enter The Bucket List, co-written by Mark Towse and Chisto Healy. The entire story takes place at Beatrice's Bed and Breakfast, a quaint little rooming house in the middle of nowhere, over the course of a single night. But Beatrice is no longer on the premises, the establishment having been taken over by Marge and Alby, a married couple with some interesting tendencies. Alby's not in the best of health, and he has a bucket list of dark and despicable things to check off before he dies. Marge, being the loving wife that she is, is determined to help him. When two couples show up at the door of the B&B on a dark and stormy night, the fun begins.
This book is a combination of Mark Towse's well-known affinity for old people horror mixed with some truly gross and disturbing scenes. The part with the toes...yep, that got every possible negative emotional response out of me in the course of one chapter. Ew.
So: torture, sadism, claustrophobia, some really gross sexual fetishes (again: toes... ew), cannibalism, and a final boss battle fight-to-the-death, all in a B&B decorated entirely in Pepto pink run by a couple of disgusting senior citizens. Horror plus humor, done right, to make for an engrossing (and just plain gross) little tale that you won't want to put down.
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T h e B u c k e t L i s t
So guys I was ask pretty recently to give this a read by one of the authors @towseywrites . This is their latest work and only recently published at the end of October.
So pretty much 2 couples end up staying at this B&B which is hosted by an old biddy and her husband, who both seemed to be a bit mad and not at all there. All 3 couples have things they want to cross off their bucket list, hence the title, though their night goes from slightly weird to buckets of brutality and blood....lots of blood!
So this has really made me not want to ever stay at a B&B run by an old person/couple ever!!! They always seem sweet and fragile but Marge and Alby our elderly hosts are nothing but! There's definitely a screw loose with both. I think Marge is the highlight for me; World's Best Grandma....yeah right!! She is a force to be reckoned with and right up to the end! The witty remarks and puns she comes out with adds to her character which I really enjoyed!
The writers definitely served this up as a extremely gory, bloody plate of horror that you will need a strong stomach for, with some monkey business thrown in there for good measure 🐵
I flew through this and really enjoyed it! Would definitely recommend this to others who enjoy more extreme horror with a comedy element to it. 4 stars 🌟 -
⚰️The Bucket List⚰️
By @towseywrites and @chistohealy
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Hey book friends 👋🏻
I was recently, very kindly, offered a gifted copy of this book in exchange for an honest review from the incredible @towseywrites
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This is one of many books I have read from Mark, and I am never disappointed and this book was no different!
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Synopsis:
A raging storm and a bed and breakfast off the beaten path. Three couples looking to cross things off their bucket lists.
A night of puns, quips, and brutal violence, hosted by the sweet, mad, elderly couple: Marge and Alby.
If you're a fan of Horror/comedy, give this one a go and cross it off your bucket list. But be warned, there will be blood. Buckets of it.
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Marge and Alby, owners of a small bed and breakfast, quickly became my favourite characters in this story, they are truly unhinged and psychotic and gave me all the horror and suspense vibes I needed!
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I finished this story in a couple of sitting purely because I needed to know what happened and the pacing kept me gripped!
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I would strongly reccomend this book to you if you ever enjoyed the hostel films, with graphic torture, helpless victims and some great tense scenes that had me zooming through the pages!
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This is the story of Margie and Alby, who run a B&B. It's also the story of Chris and Judy, retired, taking to the open road to tick off some bucket list items, and they stay at the B&B. It's also the story of young couple, Richie and Melody, also on somewhat of a bucket list mission, who end up at the same B&B.
Horrifying hilarity ensues.
Honestly, the less you know about this book going in, the better. Once again, Mark Towse weaves an "old-people" centric story that amuses, confuses, and horrifies. The co-author, Chisto Healy, is new to me, and I was very impressed with the collabertation here. At no point was I able to tell where one author ended and the other began (and I was looking!). It flows beautifully as if from one mind, and I'd be interested to know what their writing process was like.
Overall, a thoroughly entertaining, well-written, perfectly executed read with great horror scenes and characters. -
Wow! This was an absolute surprise! I knew I was in for a treat, but what I got was the whole buffet. This novella gave me the chills. It definitely played on one of my biggest fears. Imagine traveling through the countryside, and a massive storm comes around. This is what happens to our protagonist. As they get into the B&B, the owners, Marge and Alby, welcome them with open arms. Unfortunately, that is where the niceness ends.
Marge and Alby definitely take the cake for the spookiest old couple. Mark and Chisto have created one intense, animalistic, and suspenseful novella. I've read a lot of Mark's work, and this was by far one of the most terrifying. I absolutely felt the desperation and anguish the couples had to go through, and that to me is very important not only in a horror book but in any literature I read. -
About a week ago, an author named Mark Towse reached out to me, asking if I’d be interested in receiving a novel of his, to which I said of course! He recommended The Bucket List, and I honestly could not put it down!
A combination of Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Bates Motel, this delightfully grotesque novel was a breath of fresh air.
Packed to the brim with violence and gore, well established characters with their own quirks, and humour that I even caught myself chuckling at, this is a book I highly recommend for those interested in starting out in extreme horror. I will definitely be reading more of their books.
I would’ve liked to have known more about Beatrice and her run-in with the deranged geriatric couple, but that’s just me nit-picking. I honestly can’t think of anything negative to say about this book.
