| Title | : | The Commoner's Guide to Bedding a Royal |
| Author | : | |
| Rating | : | |
| ISBN | : | - |
| Language | : | English |
| Format Type | : | ebook |
| Number of Pages | : | 2832 |
| Publication | : | Published June 19, 2019 |
Words: 500682
The Commoner's Guide to Bedding a Royal Reviews
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FINALLY. This book was SOOO long, and I just wanted it to be over. I'm really sad about it because I liked it at first. It took me so long to finish that I've practically forgotten almost everything, emphasis on the almost.
Let's start off with the romance because I had a lot of problems with it. I didn't ship Dramione at the end; that was how much I disliked the characters together. I felt like Draco didn't put enough effort into the relationship, and Hermione just let him walk over her. Like, I honestly don't know how they fell in love. They literally didn't have the time for it.
Then there are the side characters. I disliked Pansy SO MUCH. She acted so holy, and shit like her words was everything and just kept trying to bring Hermione down. Then she freaking gets knocked up. Like how was she supposed to be the sound one in the group?
Daphne was just as annoying, and I wanted to smack her across the head so bad. She played so much with Theo's feelings, and then when he finally found love, she chooses him. Like girl, that ain't how it works. You gotta choose your timing better. I really hoped that he would choose Fleur over Daphne, but sadly he did not.
My heart literally hurt for Blaise. I felt like he was always left out and wasn't as important to the group. They treated him really shitty.
Honestly, if Hermione had just chosen Harry at the start of the book, it would probably have gone a lot better. She and Draco were the couple that had been together the longest but got married last it was honestly embarrassing.
I really hate that in almost every Dramione fanfic I read, Hermione is this intelligent bookworm with no fashion sense. Like why can't she be smart and wear something cute? Them reminding her about her ugly outfits was so tiring in the end.
Though I gave the book 1 star, it wasn't because it was terrible. The writing was good, and the plot wasn't the worst. My main issue was just the length. It lost me, and in the end, I didn't even care what happened, which is why I dislike it so much. Though I still wouldn't recommend it to anyone. -
“Daphne Greengrass didn't want to feel the things she felt for Theo Nott. She was never more breakable than when she was in his hands, never more fragile, and it was a sensation she positively loathed. Most of the time she could convince herself she felt nothing. Numbing herself was a reflex she'd perfected at a young age. Other people, people who weren't Theo Nott, were safe. They couldn't hurt her, certainly couldn't break her, and”
“You're the girl I'm going to marry," Theo Nott said to Daphne Greengrass on the occasion of their first kiss, a statement that was hardly preceded by anything else. Maybe there had been a joke here and there, maybe a laugh. Maybe she'd been in some particularly flattering pose and he'd let himself get carried away. But in the moment, he'd said the words and she'd looked up at him and felt her heart twist and lurch and in that instant, she'd thought, my god, you idiot boy, you might be right.”
“Pans," Harry said with a sigh, stroking a hand over her hair and resting his chin atop her head. "Did it really never occur to you that perhaps I might want The foot massages," he explained, and she stared at him, utterly bewildered. "For when your feet swell? Those, you know the ones—I want them. I want the doctor's visits. I want the trips to the shops when you can't do without some sweet, or “Marry me and I'll fuck you," Harry said with guttural certainty, his voice buried in fabric. "As often as you want. However you want me to."
She shuddered. "You really think I'm just another of your randy conquests, then?"
"No." He shook his head. "You're the conquest, Pansy. You're endgame." He rose up slightly, fingers toying with the buttons of her blouse. "You're the one I've been waiting all this time to win."
"I'm not a prize, Harry," she reminded him with an irritable groan, though she leaned her head back for the kiss he bestowed on her neck.
"No," he said, "but you're mine to earn, and I will spend a lifetime doing it.” -
The writing was excellent and the dynamic between the characters are so on point (even though we still don’t know who is leading at the end lol) and highkey I was rooting for theo n daph more than dramione lmao their angst was *chefs kiss* even though the fic was dreadfully long for my tastes.
Now back to the wizarding universe ✨ -
dnfing this it is too long i do not have the patience rn LMAOO
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2000 plus pages of greatness
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positively adored this. top 5 dramione and also first place for AU. the banter?!?! or lord. so good
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I had to dnf. I disliked almost every character. Daphne was self centered and made terrible decisions. Pansy was incredibly pretentious and full of her self. Draco seemed like his duty would come before Hermione. Blaise was underdeveloped compared to everyone else and was often forgotten.
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Quite good and enjoyable! I loved the bantering dialogues, the way the author tried her hand at various styles by telling the story from different peoples' points of view, the way she carried on different relationship lines, the juicy characters.
Some of the story twists raised the eyebrows and didn't add up, but you'll only notice it if you dig too deep.
Overall it's a marvelous and very funny read. A bit long, so strap in for the ride :) -
3.5 stars
This was pretty fun, a bit too long, but an enjoyable read nonetheless.
I do have some grievances:
1. The beginning of Hermione's and Draco's relationship didn't make much sense to me. The pacing was weird (?) and – even the characters themselves admit it – it was mostly about sex with very little communication. That bothered me.
2. Hermione was so dumb sometimes it was fucking unbearable. What do you mean I'm going to have to renounce my citizenship? What do you mean I'm going to have to convert to the Church of England? With all due respect, ARE YOU A FUCKING IDIOT? Anyway... moving on
3. Pansy's and Harry's relationship did more for me than Hermione's and Draco's. They had 3 seconds of protagonism and they ate. They were a much more compelling couple and I really want a whole book about those two.
That's pretty much it. I do recommend this one, but it's a looooooong read. -
so, i did read this awhile back when i tried to read all of the popular dramione fanfics, but am only logging it now bec sorry gang i do fw this (/j) and it was so so so long so it deserves a spot on my reading challenge.
olivie blake is such a good writer fr, but i do feel that the pacing in this was too fast. draco and hermione got together in what? chapter 6? which was like huh??? that fast???
which leads me to my second problem, that because they got together so fast, they were kinda boring later on… i was just skimming their pov chapters by the end and they just went on and on and on. also, surprisingly, i was more invested in the daphne/theo, harry/pansy duos in this fic bec they were both loaaads more interesting than the main couple.
in a nutshell, it was still okay. the dramione in this was subpar but the rarepairs and their whole friendship dynamic made up for it for sure.
sidenote: in no world is hermione an american to me, that girl is just 100% british -
A true masterpiece- sometimes I loved how long it was because it felt like I was actually friends with the characters and then other times I would get so frustrated at the lack of general plot because of length. Overall beyond well written and something I will cherish. I know I will genuinely miss these characters because they have become so special to me (and with 1,000+ pages of their story I feel like I actually really know them, and to say I love them would be an understatement)
“It was the admission of I can't believe my luck. It was the comfort of you, only you, for always. And it was precisely the saccharine rush of super trouper lights are gonna find me, shining like the sun.
Smiling, having fun.
Feeling like a number one.”
Also a special shout out to this being a consistent everything’s going wrong in Italy but this story makes me feel better read. -
I normally don’t read non-magical AU Dramione. But olivieblake really knows how to write a story. Her banter is unmatched and her original characters are always hilarious.
I wish Draco had been a bit more… Draco. He wasn’t nearly sassy enough for me. But he was lovely. And I REALLLLLLYYYY wanted another Draco chapter. I love his interactions with his friends.
Be warned, these chapters are LONG. That’s part of the reason it took me so long to read (along with the fact that it’s about 1700 pages). Because it could take 45 per chapter and as someone who likes to stop only on chapter ends, the commitment wasn’t always available. Doesn’t change how good the story was though. -
@1%
Putting this on hold for now✌🏻🏃🏽♀️its 3,000+ pages long and my schedule ain’t here for it
I can already tell I'm not going to like the romance that much though. They met within the first few pages of the book (which is fine if the author knew how to pace the scene and give it depth) and the whole thing was lacking chemistry. You can just expect what’s going to happen because the author is basically spelling it out for you.
Still, the writing is not bad at all in general. Ill come back to it at some point. -
I read this back in 2020 and I don't remember enough to actually rate it or review it now. I just like things added to my GR 🤭
I just mostly wanted to say that I'm not a big Dramione shipper, I just love how olivieblake writes and works with characters. I actually absolutely adore her take on Theodore Nott & Daphne Greengrass and I kind of read a lot of her fics just for them... that said her Dramione is also pretty great. But I especially read her works for her humor and writing style...
JKR is a TERF, I'm very lucky that I'm able to compartmentalize and enjoy the FF. -
it was actually good but too long for me, also reminds me about william and kate story since i’ve watched the movie. i was like ‘oh i know where this story is going’ bc it was quite the same. and im gonna take highlights for the beautifully and smart writing.
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as a person who gives Zero Shits about the irl royal family i was not expecting to love this one and lemme just say i fucking DEVOURED it 😫😫😫 i love this fic so much!!!!!! and not just for dramione but for the side characters too!!!!! hall of fame fic right here 🥰
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So many words I wish to say, but all in all a very beautiful book.
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4.5 stars
This was good but it was sooooo looong. Loved all the characters. -
Spanish/English Review.
Una autora de la cual ya mejor acepto que leeré todo lo que publica, The Commoner's Guide to Bedding a Royal ha sido uno de los fanfics más divertidos y entretenidos que he leído!
Imaginen un mundo alterno donde Hermione es americana, Draco es el príncipe segundo sucesor al trono y el resto de la pandilla de Hogwarts son también parte de la realeza y/o al menos británicos.
Mezclando elementos de la monarquía actual (Kate, Will, Harry y Megan), esta historia, a pesar de ser larga, esta SUPER ENTRETENIDA. Es una historia contada a lo largo de aprox 8 años, que pensarían ustedes es demasiado pero en ocasiones sientes que vuelan las páginas!
Hermione se va de intercambio a la universidad Hogwarts, donde entrando a esta antigua estructura, convence a un chico de cabello platinado a ayudarla con sus maletas. Y de ahí, el resto es historia. No se crean jajaja la verdad es que es una historia de altos y bajos, de el deber y el querer, Hermione y Draco se encuentran con muchas cosas en su contra para su relación, desde el rey, amigos y alguno que otro indeseable reportero (o reportera).
Es el primer AU largo ajeno a magia que leo y la verdad es que quedé encantada. No solo con Hermione y Draco si no también con el resto de los personajes. Principalmente vemos un elenco de Slytherins como realeza y adoc, pero también tenemos a Harry! Quién literalmente es el príncipe Harry (primo de Draco en este contexto). Entre más lees, más te picas y verdaderamente quieres saber como terminará esta historia!
Lo que me gustó muchísimo de este fic es que desde el inicio sabemos que nos están recapitulando todo lo que sucedió en estos largos años de relación entre Draco y Hermione y que en realidad hay una biografía de por medio escrita por Rita Skeeter la cual obvio no toma los verdaderos hechos en cuenta. Lo de siempre con esa mujer! Entonces leer cada capítulo con lo que en realidad sucedió lo hace más divertido!! Y vaya que conclusión, no esperaba que tomara ese camino para un excelente plot twist involucrando a Hermione y la princesa Narcissa (quien es uno de mis personajes favoritos de este fanfic!). De verdad, por donde le busquen, les va a encantar y con tanto guiño a la realeza moderna, estas entre reírte, apuntar con el dedo de "SI RECUERDO CUANDO ESTO SUCEDIÓ!", y mucho más.
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An author which I basically already accepted I will read anything by her, The Commoner’s Guide to Bedding a Royal is one of the funniest and most entertaining fics I’ve ever read!
Imagine a world where Hermione is American, Draco is second in line for the throne and the rest of the gang from Hogwarts are either somewhat royalty or at least British.
Mixing elements from modern royalty (Kate, Will, Harry and Megan), this story, despite being very long, IS THE BEST THING EVER. It’s a story that takes place throughout 8 years, that you’d think is too much, but most of the time the pages go by so fast you can’t keep up!
Hermione goes to Hogwarts University as an exchange student, where on her first day, manages to convince a platinum blonde guy to help her carry her luggage to her dorm. And from there, the rest is history. The truth is that this is a story of ups and downs, duty and want, Hermione and Draco find a bumpy road with their relationship, from a King, friends and some undesirable journalists.
This is the first long AU I read that doesn’t involve magic, and I was smitten with it. Not just with Hermione and Draco but also ith the rest of the cast. We see mainly Slytherins as royalty and such, but we also have Harry! Who is literally prince Harry (cousin to Draco in this story). The more you read, the more you want to never stop until you see how the story ends.
What I really really LOVED about this fanfic is that since the beginning we know that we’re being sent down memory lane on what really happened for these long 8 years between draco and Hermione, and that in reality, there is a biography by Rita Skeeter on the market that obviously doesn’t consider the truth of the story. As usual with her! So, reading each chapter, we see a snippet from said novel and then we go ahead and get the true story! And what a plot twist involving Hermione and princess Narcissa (who is one of my favorite characters in this story). Truly, no matter what, you’re going to love this story and with so many homages to modern royalty, you’ll be laughing and remembering the real truth from our world.
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Amazing writing but it's so long I got lost in the middle
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Not a fan of the insta love but the rest was great for an AU
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so good, but soooo long
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Really unique take on the dramione fanfic world. You really don’t need to have read any of the Harry Potter books since this is a complete step away from the wizarding world.
I enjoyed this story but it was a very slow build for the characters with obstacle after obstacle for them. A little frustrating but the blocks to their relationship made sense.
Overall a very sweet modern romance! -
What is basically Kate-and-William fanfic but as a person who loves any sort of royalty AU (see: goong, king2hearts, scarlet heart ryeo, etc) this was VERY GOOD and VERY funny. I have so many passages highlighted and sections bookmarked. I genuinely loved and was invested in all of Hermione's friends' side stories. My only personal issue with it is that it is VERY long and is very sustained romantic comedy, so there's not a lot of angst or conflict (which is more a personal preference) that can be continued for very long. It's perfect for being slowly read alongside something else heavier (which is what I did)
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objectively 4 stars... Is it perfect? far from it... however it is my second favorite fanfic I've read, so I am therefore obliged to rate it 5 stars even though the beginning isn't the best.
Review:
wowza, she’s a thick one. the beginning felt a bit bleh to me, but after the 10-15% mark where the characters & plot were more developed, it picked up and didn’t slow for the rest of the book. I love how this fic is more than just one couple’s journey, but the whole friends groups. this really was like a story that spanned years, and thinking back to the beginning, it does feel like that was a long time ago!
overall, I really enjoyed this & want to read more of olivie blake’s work!
