| Title | : | Bi Any Other Name: Bisexual People Speak Out |
| Author | : | |
| Rating | : | |
| ISBN | : | 1555831745 |
| ISBN-10 | : | 9781555831745 |
| Language | : | English |
| Format Type | : | Paperback |
| Number of Pages | : | 408 |
| Publication | : | First published January 1, 1991 |
Bi Any Other Name: Bisexual People Speak Out Reviews
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Bi Any Other Name is an excellent and comprehensive read for anyone who identifies as bisexual and/or is interested in activism. This collection of experiences covers a wide range of topics and types of people. I found it to be encouraging and enlightening, although I really wish bisexual writers (pornographers/educators/activists/etc) could restrain themselves from punning the word bi.
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Helped me come out as a Bi-Man.
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I received a free copy via Inked Rainbow Reads in exchange for an honest review.
If you are a bisexual (or other multisexual) person or an ally to the bi community, or if you simply want to understand bisexuality better, this book is a necessity for your collection. It is its own self-contained library of information, resources, and personal stories by and about bisexual people.
One of the things that struck me is that as a person who has only recently connected with the community, I still found so many way in which the stories resonated. While the world has changed--and new ways of looking at sex and love have emerged--a lot of things have remained the same.
The book is divided into sections, each addressing a different aspect of bi life. These are deeply personal stories about relationships and love and navigating the world. Most people will be able to find something in here to relate to.
There is no possible way to rate each and every story. Some made me want to stand up and scream, "Yes! This exact thing!" Others didn't resonate with me, and that's all right--it's not because they weren't any good, and I know someone else would be able to relate. In any case, each story was a learning experience for me, being able to read about the lives of these wonderful people.
Some readers may be surprised both by places where gender-inclusive language is used to describe attractions and by places where it is not. Be aware going in that there is a wide range of perspectives represented, and no one experience should be used to measure an entire vast community of people. Nor should any one story be used as "proof" of what the bisexual community is or is not.
I am simply blown away by the time, effort, and care given to putting this collection together. What a fitting way to celebrate twenty years! Many thanks to all the people who devoted themselves to this project, particularly Lani and Loraine. -
I loved the idea of a book like this, but the editors got it so wrong in the introduction. For me bisexuality is about equality, male, female, doesn't matter, all the same. But when debating on whether or not to include males in the book these Feminists wrote: Yes but their view on Bisexuality hasn't caught up yet and some other things along those lines. What the hell is that supposed toe mean! So woman are better bisexuals? Screw you!
As a result I was about to throw the book out (figuratively speaking) but I paid for it so I eventually only read the sections written by guys.
Really really sad to see a unique book, which could have made a difference, stuble and fall on it's own prejudice. -
As a bisexual author, I encourage anyone who's coming into their sexuality, to read this magnificent book.
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I've read plenty of theoretical works about the sexuality of gay men, and while this did help me get out of the closet, after a while I just wanted to read about men and women like me who found themselves attracted to more than one gender. Though before I continue I should make my position clear, though I came out as bisexual I now usually just tell people that I'm queer, mostly because my sexuality is so fluid that bisexuality just feels limiting whereas queer feels far more inclusive. I still will use bisexual as a label however if I need someone to understand the general trend of my desire.
This collection of essays and poems provides a wide variety of types of bisexual people. Whereas some have listed this book as a kind of "bible" for bisexuals, I think it would be more appropriate to just list this as a resource and a starting one at that. Many of the essays are from writers and political activists from an older generation of bisexual people and the reader is able to recognise this as many of the essays deal with the persecution of bisexuals from the gay and straight communities, or else dealing with the "fresh" issues with AIDS. These essays can be a good starting point from which young queer people can start to gain a sense of themselves before moving on to other works.
Bisexual people still face persecution from the gay and straight community, but the issues have started to change, and the queer community has become far more nuanced because of such changes. Though many of these essays remain relevant, some have aged and so the reader who approaches this book needs to understand that these are testimonies rather than guidelines.
Queer self examination requires time and thought, but it also requires validation from other people, and that's why this collection is so vital. It offers people like me the chance to observe someone else's desire and wonder if I don't see something of myself in them. It gives me the chance to determine if I agree or disagree with someone's assessment of what bisexuality actually is and what it can offer to the queer community at large. And most importantly, it shows me that I can write my desire into the discourse an contribute my own voice.
I can write about my sexual and emotional desires for other men and women, both cis and trans, and have it heard. This book just one of many great books, and like the the best of them, it gives me links and ties to new books that will only deepen the discussion.
This book isn't a bible, it's a bridge to new communities and new ideas of sex and sexuality. -
Perspectives on bisexuality from a variety of writers, ranging from college-aged women to married men involved in the AIDS epidemic. Talented writers that make one proud to be part of bisexuality, and help those of other sexual preference to understand what it is to be bisexual. Like any sexuality, the stories are different, the people want different things. An important read for anyone interested in human sexuality, dealing with the issues of being bisexual, or supporting someone who is.
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The Bi Bible you say?
I believe that to consider a book as "bible" it needs to contain useful information and also be atemporal.
This book is an anthology of bisexuals who mostly grew up during the 70's/80's so it's filled with people being oppressed and dying. It's awful.
I mean, it's great to know there are others bisexuals out there but it's not a very empowering book. -
This anthology of the work of bisexual writers is one of the first books I read after coming out as bisexual. It was very validating for me to find a book about bisexual people with so many positive things to say after enduring the negation of my identity from a number of people. I would like to see contemporary bisexual people update the important and groundbreaking work done in this book by writing in an anthology on bisexual issues that speaks to the current state of bisexual people's lives and our more recent history.
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The Bible of contemporary Bi life.
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Had to set all other books aside and just focus on reading this. Validating. Necessary for bis everywhere. A life-changer.
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I picked a good time to read this- re-embracing my bisexuality from a new angle is something that really has only found footing for me over the last year, in quarantine, limited in my options to explore beyond sharing thoughts with my loved ones and turning those thoughts around in my head on and on and fantasizing and re-considering everything.
For me, there was something to gain from most of these essays, even if I didn't relate. I only skipped over a couple that didn't line up with my beliefs and made me roll my eyes. I do also have a problem with the editors' decision to include fewer male bisexual voices because men's feminism is more behind than women's. I'm sure this is true even 30 years after its publishing date, but as one of the gay guys who realized he also loves and is attracted to women, and especially finding out over the last year that this is MUCH more common than I was thinking while battling with my own shame and confusion over it, it seems misleading to intentionally make this choice in a book that is subtitled Bisexual PEOPLE Speak Out!
Still, it's a book that seems to have opened up a lot of discussions for its time and holds up in 2021. It's given me even more to think about, has increased my pride and reduced my negative sentiments. The people included in this book boldly speak of taboos that still invite confusion at best from a majority of society even in modern times, and being given these words and a feeling of it-is-okay-and-totally-normal-to-be-like-this means a LOT. Worth checkin out! -
A great book! Very inspirational and healing.
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this book is very much a product of its context. it was published in 1991, the year before i was born, and like any other collection of writings from a diverse group of people, it should be read with that context in mind. the AIDS crisis was hitting marginalized groups hard, bush 43 was president, and the internet was in its infancy. there's a section of resources in the back, and no websites are listed because the world wide web had just went public! so much has changed in thirty years and yet, a lot has stayed the same.
in the interest of full disclosure, i'm not bisexual myself. i am a transgender woman (who understandably cringed at a lot of the very, VERY dated descriptions of trans people in this book) and i am a lesbian. i am also a historian--my degree is in history and i have a minor in sexuality studies. so this book was basically a perfect cross-section of my interests! since i'm not bi, i wasn't necessarily interested in finding things to relate to in this book (although i did nonetheless). what i was interested in was the status of the bisexual community, historically speaking. if you are also interested in that, well, you'll have a hoot with this book.
since it's a collection of EXTREMELY personal writings, as well as a few more academic pieces, it's hard to judge it as a whole. there are several pieces that feel like they could have been written this year. there are several pieces in which it is blatantly obvious that they were written in the late 80s and early 90s. AIDS is mentioned in almost every other piece. other pieces delve into topics like the fluidity of sexuality, the tension between some lesbians and bisexuals, open relationships, and the intersection between sexuality and spirituality. there are some pieces that are duds. there are some pieces that are so good that i showed some of my friends. that's kind of what you get with a collection such as this. -
For all the shitty things I’ve experienced, one thing I’m grateful for is that I’ve never genuinely questioned my sexuality. I knew I was bisexual as soon as I knew what crushes were (circa age 12), and I’ve been bisexual ever since. I’d love to read an updated and/or expanded edition of an anthology like this; as it is, there are several significant flaws, but overall... how great is it that there’s an entire anthology of bisexual people?! I think it’s pretty damn great. We should have more of those, actually.
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This is one of the first books on bisexuality that I ever read. I think it was one of the first books on bisexuality ever published. It consists of the true, personal stories of people who identify as bisexual. Reading about how other people realized they were bisexual, how they came out, and what their bisexual identify meant to them was really helpful to me when I was trying to figure out my own sexual identity.
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This book was pretty important when I was first coming out as bisexual. It's a good book to help get a sense of the variety and ways people can come to identify as bisexual, which helps you find your place for your own identity.
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When I finally got a chance to read this classic bisexual anthology, I was surprised to find that what stood out to me most wasn't the aspects of the writers' stories that personally resonated with me but rather how clearly this anthology painted a picture of early bi+ history. Although most of the writing in this collection was very personal, I found the writers also often described the historical contexts shaping bi communities at that time (e.g. AIDS, the development and expansion of bi groups/organizations, reactions towards bi+ folks from lesbian and gay organizations). This historical aspect quickly became my favorite part of the book and even inspired me to start developing presentations on bi+ history.
Some modern readers have complained that it was too dated or didn't address certain topics inclusively (notably gender and gender politics), but I think those criticisms ignore the beauty of being provided such an authentic snapshot of bi experiences from a different era. Just because the ways of thinking and talking about bisexuality have changed since the 80s and 90s, doesn't mean that it's not important to understand how it was being talked about back then. I believe that the bi+ community and the overall LGBTQ+ community are always made stronger by knowing and understanding our history, and this anthology is the best example of bi history from that era I have encountered.
I highly recommend this book to anyone who's curious about bi+ history/how bi+ folks navigated the 70s-early 90s. -
This was a very interesting read. Very much a snapshot of the Era (late 80's early 90's). Was interesting to see how much has changed along with how much has stayed the same regarding homo/Bi phobia, politics, culture and feminism. Seems very quick that we have forgotten how devastating the AIDS epidemic was when it was untreatable. I found the collection of stories of life experiences, coming out experiences, political involvement and general evolution of bisexual culture intriguing and revealing. One or two stories rang very true with me and I'm sure any bisexual person reading this book will have many moments of association. There was also quite a bit of history that I didn't know that much about. I usually listen to audiobooks but could only find this in text so it took me a bit longer to read, but I'm glad I did.
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A valuable collection of voices that does what it says on the cover. A recent historical perspective too, as the writing is pre-1992 and the experiences span the prior decades. The political aspect (and political historical aspects) of these accounts interested me most and I've shared multiple highlights.
Of interest and relevance most to bisexual peeps but very much also to everyone else interested in the experience of being bisexual in the USA, pre-1992. And some things remain the same in nearly 30 years on. -
This was full of great insight into the history of bi culture. I appreciated the various viewpoints, and I wish they would do an update (maybe a 20 year re-issue?). Great for starting your journey on bi information.
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Foundational book about what it means to be bisexual.
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this has some gems, but it’s very binary, focused on sex, and repetitive.
content/trigger warning; discussions of biphobia, internalized biphobia, homophobia, lesbophobia, d slur, f slur, suicide, sex, cheating, aids, lesbian separatism, incest, sexual assault, domestic abuse, ableism, transphobia, religion, marital rape, death, loss of loved one, racism, antisemitism, nazis, war,
i’ll start with some quotes:
“pansexual people have been actively involved in the bisexual community since the 1970s.”
“the point is to respect one another and remain flexible in the ever changing self-identity landscape. we have to hold a safe space for people to define their personal experience without judgement. there is room for all of us.”
“living both inside and outside the sexual and social [gender] paradigms, we bisexuals, queer people, polysexuals, fluid people, pansexuals, by every name we call ourselves — continue to subvert gender assumptions and explore naming ourselves — by every other identity, to no-identity-needed-or-wanted at all.”
“critiques of all terms, including the term bisexual, need to continue for as long as human consciousness develops and needs further ongoing clarification. we have critique which increases personal authority to define one’s own truth of self and exposes prejudicially assumed authority to define others in a way that denies their truth. constrained by the snapshot language of any given historical moment, we persist in our quest to aptly name the experience of living with/in the evolving continuums. what’s most important is respecting each person’s self-identity and being recognized and understood for who we are.”
“the feelings came first; the language and labels came afterwards. naming can limit as well as empower.”
“to be perfectly frank, i can barely imagine what it’s like to be a lesbian or a straight woman, to be attracted to women because they are female — and that is sexy — or to men because they are male. in that way i feel like both of them share a common perception which i will never know — that i am color blind or tone deaf to a gender-erotic world.” - someone who doesn’t define their sexuality by what she “might or might not like” but by her “honest exploration of my sexual desires” and refers to herself as “sexually sovereign.”
“we know that it is very difficult. we know exactly how you feel. we can help you. just step over here to this nice little box we have for you. that’s it, step inside. cozy, isn’t it? there now, we’ll just put on this lid nice and tight. if you breath real shallowly, there should be just enough air to live on. now, doesn’t that feel better?”
“without community, there is no liberation, only the most vulnerable and temporary armistice between an individual and her [his] oppression. but community must not mean shedding of our differences, nor the pathetic pretense that these differences do not exist... it is learning how to stand alone, unpopular and sometimes reviled, and how to make common cause with those others identified as outside the structures, in order to define and seek a world in which we can all flourish. it is learning how to take our differences and make them strengths. — audre lorde”
“there is no one right way to be a bisexual; there are many.”
“i think we might better explain at least some of the stories about bisexuals who leave their same-sex lovers for heterosexual relationships in the same ways we explain being left, period, rather than as some special form of desertion and betrayal.”
“labels are always limiting because they conjure up different feelings to individuals based on their own experiences. if we identify ourselves with standard definitions, we shortchange ourselves, painting an incomplete picture of who we really are.”
“if we claim self-definition for ourselves, then we must accord that right to others.”
“it is fine for people to call themselves, or not call themselves, whatever they wish.”
“we have each found some labels that feel right for us. lucy is an anarcha-feminist bisexual, and liz is a bisexual anarchist. the distinction may appear to be a fine one, but the order of the words, and the context in which they are delivered, matter a lot. these labels, these tidbits of self-knowledge, which are always under scrutiny and subject to change, publicize a great deal about who we are and what (and who) we get passionate about.”
“people take on labels for a variety of reasons. probably the most powerful reason is that the label acknowledges an important, and perhaps inescapable, truth about themselves. other incentives are positive associations with a label and admiration for those who wear it and the existence of a community of people who share the label and can provide solidarity and support. labels may be used as political tools, as a way to make a statement, or to make connections with others. some people choose certain labels explicitly in order to avoid other labels that do not fit.”
“why do some people reject labels? specific labels may be rejected because of the lack of positive associations, role models, or communities. another powerful discouragement is the fear of coming out in the face of a hostile society; this is especially true when considering labels that are likely to provoke a negative response. still another reason is that labels may lead to false alliances — for example, the idea that those who share a label should always support one another, even though they may have conflicting political views and agendas. we should take care not to reject potential friends and allies because we do not have enough labels in common. some people reject the very idea of labeling. they refuse labels on principle as too simplistic and because labels allow us to view others as collections of traits and stereotypes rather than as complex and unique human beings.”
“accepting a label that is widely despised can be an empowering experience. it is a means of claiming and identity and displaying it proudly. by adopting a label, we may encourage others to come out of their own closets and to take pride in who they are. openly identifying with a label can be a good way to meet others with similar ideas and goals. finally, wearing a label is an important means of education. many people fear or dislike those associated with certain labels because they are different, ‘abnormal,’ or ‘deviant.’ if more of us openly acknowledged our unpopular labels, it would become apparent just how common some forms of ’deviance’ really are!”
and now some things that bothered me:
in the 25th anniversary introduction, the topic of what mspec people “should” be called is brought up and all that’s really talked about is pansexuals who say bi is binary and how bi and pan are often defined in comparison and how that leads to misunderstandings about what bi actually is. and like, bi isn’t binary, but this book is. there isn’t a single person in this book who defined or explained or talked about their bisexuality in a way that wasn’t binary. how are you going to get up on a high horse and criticize other people for “arbitrarily” portraying bi as binary, when the understanding of bisexuality that readers will come away from this book with is “men and women” or “both sexes” or “either gender”?
and more than that, instead of actually discussing mspec labels, since that’s what the section was claiming to cover, it was used as an opportunity to continue the narrative that pan people are uniquely biphobic or that pan people are the ones instigating wars about labels or that bi people are the only ones harmed by said label wars. when that isn’t the case at all. there’s an article in bi women quarterly from the ’80s that is basically a multiple page rant about how harmful it is that people dare to not call themselves bi even though they “could.” there’s even a chapter in this book where one of the authors say it’s frustrating when bi people don’t call themselves bi, and it’s like....if they don’t call themselves bi, why the fuck are you? the right to self-identification and to have that respected goes out the window when it’s mspec people not identifying as bi. and this is not a new thing. but you wouldn’t know that from this book.
i’m just so annoyed they could have addressed this topic in an objective, inclusive way, but they didn’t. they could have gone into all the different labels that have gained visibility and been created since the book was published, and how they’re all important and needed and valid labels, but they didn’t. they could have addressed the label policing and gatekeeping and mspec-phobia that happens on all sides, but they didn’t. they could have discussed how the bisexual community has always been a diverse and inclusive place where all mspec people, regardless of what labels they used or if they used any, were included and welcomed and supported, but they didn’t. they could have done so many things, but they didn’t. they chose to instead argue against the idea that bi is binary, even though their book is proof of there being a time when bi was largely discussed in binary ways, and falsely attributed that belief to pan people/the existence of pansexuality.
other things that bothered me were obviously the binary way in which sexuality is discussed, trans people were mentioned a few times (with outdated terms) but not really included, the majority of chapters were just detailing sex lives, and everything got repetitive after a couple chapters. i personally didn’t care for the spirituality section, not because there’s anything wrong with it, but because it’s not my thing. i don’t care for the repeated use of “baby dyke” and the often unchallenged concept of queer people having “heterosexual privilege.” overall it’s not really as boundary breaking and radical and feminist as the contributors would want you to think.
similar to view from another closet, phrases that i relate to or i’ve used in explaining pansexuality are used in this book, but i don’t relate to them here because of the context they’re used in; discussions of attraction in terms of (binary) gender. this isn’t so much a negative or thing that bothered me, it’s just something i noted again. -
Voy a escribir en español, aunque lo leí en ingle porque estoy de un humor extraño y es mi Goodreads y no tengo que contestarle a nadie por nada. Aparte esto es más para mí. So, es mi cuarto libro del año y no fue mi favorito. Sigo sin tener un libro maravilloso para este año pero hay esperanza. Este libro es mi primer libro relacionado con la bisexualidad. Me hizo reflexionar bastante en cómo es que en el 2020 la gente puede seguir a alguien en Instagram y aprende y se siente parte de una comunidad. Es lindo en ese sentido que el internet te permite encontrarte con tu gente pero me gustaría conocer en persona a gente de carne y hueso. Creo que eso es más personal porque no tengo ni la menor idea de cómo se hace uno amigo de alguien en internet, no nací con ese talento y me cuesta horrores. So, me siendo parte de una comunidad pero tengo solo a mis amigos. Y no es por hacer a mis amigos menos, porque no señor, esos seres son maravillosos, pero a veces quiero como la experiencia de gente que ya paso por ciertas cosas, y pues igual eso me cuesta en la vida real. “By any other name” (debería estar en itálicas pero no se hacer eso) me gusto y no. A veces me aburría, a veces era la versión larga de algo que ya entendía, pero hubo veces en las que conecte y me puso sentimental. Es un conjunto de experiencias o de reflexiones conforme a la bisexualidad. Que tuve la suerte de encontrar, de verdad fue suerte pura, en la biblioteca central. Quien diría que la UNAM tendría libros de este tipo. Pero si. Me gusto las poesía y las vivencias de las personas más que la teoría. Me ayudo realmente. Antes habían pequeñas preguntas sobre cómo iba a responderle a alguien sobre la bisexualidad. Y ahora las tengo. Mi quote no quote favorita es “la posibilidad” que te da la bisexualidad. So, maybe algún día será más fácil coming out con mi gente. No sé. Pero pues para la gente que se siente medio pérdida es una buena lectura. No es novela pero hay mini plots. Hay vida o vivencias. Y ya. Léanlo maybe.
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My impression of this book changed the more I read. At first, I had a few concerns - there were a few things that didn't age well. Though this is a bi-positive book meant to empower bi people, a lot of the content shocked me and came across as heterosexist, cissexist, and just plain sexist (not to mention even biphobic!). Though, that's just the curse of writing about a developing area of politics- especially identity politics. I didn't feel like it encapsulated my bisexual experience, especially with it's obsession with binaries. I was especially disturbed about potentially not including men because 'their views of equality [are] ten years behind' (because women had the feminist movement). Seriously?
However, it definitely grew on me. My partner and I read out stories to each other before bed and we discovered some that we really related to. One thing that stuck out was bisexual women talking about the radical equality they experience being in a relationship with a woman that just isn't present/is much harder to foster in a relationship with a man. We can both relate to that.
However, since it was an interloan I had to return it today without finishing it. I was about 80 pages in. Maybe I'll finish it one day - probably not. There are much more valuable things I could read. -
3.5
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Having read this so long ago, I can't write a full review of it at this point, but what I remember was the relief I felt at the time to find a book that acknowledged the unique place and voices of those along the spectrum of Bi/Pan-identified individuals without forcing an either/or choice of sexual preference. A lot has changed for awareness and acceptance in the intervening years so I'm no longer sure how ground-breaking or relevant this would feel to read today, but I suspect that while there may be many who fall somewhere in between, the acceptance outside of major metropolitan or liberally leaning areas is still probably less than what it could be.
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This book is like, important for what it stands for and i can understand how relevant it is for bisexual ppl such as myself, but this book is really, really trans-exclusionary. i can't recall any essays by trans people, if there were any; maybe one or two. they even define "transperson" in the back of the book, but dont really include them in the discourse. such a shame too, because trans people and bisexuals have always been closely allied together in fighting to be recognized as real members of the LGBT community.
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Important for understanding bi history
I read the new anniversary edition of this book in 2017. Its age does show a bit—but I think it’s important reading today anyway. You’ll read a lot in this book of the struggles of bi women against exclusionary lesbians, and a little bit about bi men’s stories as well, as well as one really touching story from the father of a young bi man. I’m glad I read this book.
