How We Fight For Our Lives by Saeed Jones

How We Fight For Our Lives Reviews

• 
  Roxane

  In his astonishing unparalleled memoir How We Fight For Our Lives Saeed Jones writes of making his body into a weapon a fierce thing that can cut In these pages Jones also makes language into a fierce cutting weapon How We Fight For Our Lives is a coming of age story it is a love letter to a black single mother it is an indictment of our culture that creates so little space for gay men to learn how to be who they truly are Most of all this memoir is a rhapsody in the truest sense of the word fragments of epic poetry woven together so skillfully so tenderly so brutally that you will find yourself aching in the way only masterful writing can make a person ache How We Fight For Our Lives is that rare book that will show you what it means to be needful to be strong to be gloriously human and fighting for your life
• 
  Jenna

  I'm not sure how to rate this book  The author writes beautifully and the second part of the book is pretty much a song of love and gratitude towards his mother  5 stars for the second partThe first part?  Well What the heck is it with some of these coming out memoirs by gay men that have to tell you about all the dick they've had???  As a lesbian I definitely do not enjoy hearing about dick  This book was similar to I Can't Date Jesus Love Sex Family Race and Other Reasons I've Put My Faith in Beyoncé another coming out memoir by a young black man that described a lot of sex acts  I can appreciate and identify with the uestions and insecurities of growing up gay and feeling you're different  Worrying that people will hate you if they find out  Wondering if there is something inherently bad and wrong about you  Had Saeed Jones left it at those uestions and feelings I would have liked this book   I don't see the need to talk graphically about having many sex partners whether someone is gay straight or lesbian  Unless you're writing porn which is fine if it's labelled as such then I don't see the merit in adding graphic sex situationsThat was a big turn off ha ha for me with this book  Mr Jones talks a little about the Black experience too and I appreciated learning about the specific challenges for a gay Black man in America  I also loved reading about his mother how he felt about her their relationship that appeared strong and yet it was never clear whether she fully accepted his sexuality  4 stars though it would have been 5 if not for so much dick talk
• 
  Nenia ✨️ Socially Awkward Trash Panda ✨️ Campbell

  Instagram || Twitter || Facebook || || PinterestHOW WE FIGHT FOR OUR LIVES is such a great memoir It's everything a good memoir should be sensual moving thoughtful provoking erotic intense and uniue but it also opens up many meaningful discussions and dialogues about what it means to be black what it means to be gay what it means to be both and how it feels to be part of a group that is singled out even from within members of each disparate community hence the ever important need for intersectionality in political movementsSaeed is a really great memoirist His writing is gorgeous and flows This is one of the first memoirs I've read in a while that almost feels like fiction in that the author is able to distance himself from well himself and write personally and honestly about his experiences without making you feel like he's trying to apologize for being the way he is or offer some sort of narrative direction It makes the memoir feel really personal and at the same time you also feel like you're watching a story unfoldI don't really have any complaints about this book Some people have said that they did not like Saeed's choices I can kind of guess which ones but experience makes us who we are I'm pretty hard to shock at this point and felt like this memoir was very tame compared to others I have read I liked how he melded his story with the concerns many people have with regard to racism and discrimination and the parts about his mother were heart wrenchingDefinitely a must read for those looking for great new books by black andor LGBT authors Thanks to the publisher for sending me a copy in exchange for an honest review  4 to 45 stars
• 
  Betsy

  Tell me please I hardly ever say this but this book was too short I wanted Saeed Jones is a fantastic storyteller even when he is telling stories that are heartbreaking and difficult to read His vignettes about finding his place as a young gay black man from the South are powerful and vivid There are age old adages about how literature helps us understand others and How We Fight For Our Lives is a window into experiences that are completely unlike my ownI wanted because the vignettes left some things out Roughly 23 of the way through the memoir Jones frames a traumatic event as a turning point for him We're only given bits and pieces of how his thinking and behavior changed after this event so I wanted to hear this part of the story too The memoir ends in 2011 which seems like an odd stopping point for a very young man's story Jones was born in 1985 so 2011 2019 is roughly a uarter of his life I understand why he chose to end this memoir where he did but I also wonder how he has grown since then Four stars Read How We Fight for Our Lives if you're interested in a powerful account of the author's intersectional experience Readers should be forewarned that some content is graphicThanks to Simon Schuster and NetGalley for giving me a DRC of this book which will be available for purchase on October 8th
• 
  Esil

  High 4 starsHow We Fight For Our Lives is a powerful short memoir Saeed Jones is gay and black He grew up in Texas with a single mother Buddhist convert who suffered from congenital heart disease This memoir spans Jones’ life from ages 12 to 25 Jones gives his readers a raw taste of his life in that time span including the rough ride he got from peers in high school and his successful but self destructive self reinvention as a student in at a small college in Kentucky Jones also delves into the strong bond with his mother and the fractious relationship with the rest of his family I loved Jones’ honesty I also loved that he is not self flattering or self pitying I especially loved the last part in which he deals so honestly with the grief of losing his mother at 25 I hope Jones produces other segments of his life in memoir form Thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for an opportunity to read an advance copy
• 
  Paris (parisperusing)

  It brings me great pain and joy to know Saeed Jones’ How We Fight For Our Lives will be set upon us all Pain for the collective loss and sorrow gay black boys have suffered and joy in knowing that it is stories like these that will set us freeIt’s been a month since I read Saeed Jones’ How We Fight For Our Lives and I fumbled so long to put words to its visceral glamour When I first heard of its arrival over the winter I needed it immediately To imagine the amount of blood sweat and tears Saeed must’ve sacrificed to saturate these pages is beyond me What emerges from that offering is a story of a gay boy coming into the blackness of his body its starkest desires and demands and an anthem of unsung single black mothers who must raise their boys to be their own saviors before it’s too lateFront to back no other book has echoed so much of my own experience as a gay black boy like this It took no effort at all to read Saeed’s story with an empathetic heart because I have been living this story in real time There were so many instances I caught myself saying “I know what that feels like too” and “Yes Yes that was me That’s STILL me” You never forget your first 'faggot' Because the memory in its way makes you It becomes a spine for the body of anxieties and insecurities that will follow something to hang all that meat on Before you were just scrawny; now you're scrawny because you're a faggot Before you were just bookish; now you're bookish because you're a faggotSoon bullies won't even have to say the word Nor will friends as they start to sit at different lunch tables without explanation There will already be a voice in your head whispering 'faggot' for them I was pricked with my first N word assault by another white boy whose vestige still haunts me in the faces of white men wanting to be friends lovers or bringers of harm I watched my mother’s smile dissolve in the face of financial and spiritual uncertainty and the tenacity with which she raged at every whisper of my sexuality and my little brother’s autism I too have submitted to the dehumanizing fetishes of white men that can drive a vulnerable black boy to hate himself and others like him I know the sting of falling for straight men capable of nothing than breaking our hearts if not our whole being And above all I still tussle with the prodigious fear of a lonely loveless life because of who I was born to beThanks Simon Schuster friends for sending me this remarkable book — and Saeed Jones for sharing your light with the world ❤️ If you liked my review feel free to follow me parisperusing on Instagram
• 
  Malia

  I had listened to an interview with the author on an NPR podcast and it intrigued me enough to pick up this book Jones has a very engaging style of writing that feels almost like fiction in some cases when he is abused for being gay you wish it were fiction It is strange to me sometimes when people who are still uite young he is in his thirties write memoirs but Jones really does have an important and relevant story to tell and one that I am glad I had a chance to read It is a short book but I think it will stay with me for some time to comeThanks to Netgalley for supplying me with a copy of this book in exchange for an honest reviewFind reviews and bookish fun at
• 
  Jenny (Reading Envy)

  Saeed Jones writes about growing up black and gay in a family that preferred not to have its secrets spoken out loud He went on to college in Kentucky which had its own challenges but it is also where he found his voice as a writer I particularly loved the family dynamics single mother and Buddhism in the south makes for some great moments How Saeed is tokenized andor overlooked for hookups aligns with what I've heard from other black men but no less disheartening I look forward to reading his poetry and anything else from this point forward
• 
  Hannah

  Very very goodReview to come
• 
  Madalyn (Novel Ink)

  This book first came up on my radar when I heard the author interviewed on my favorite podcast last year and it feels like my library hold for it came in at exactly the right time How We Fight for Our Lives chronicles Saeed Jones coming of age as a Black gay man in the South in the late 90’s and 2000’s Jones’s background in poetry is evident in the uality and flow of the writing because this is one of my most beautifully written memoirs I’ve read in uite some time It’s not always an easy read but it’s one I’m so glad exists If you’re looking to read some nonfiction by ueer Black authors this Pride month or any other time of the year I can’t recommend this one enough