Living Among Meat Eaters: The Vegetarians Survival Handbook by Carol J. Adams

Living Among Meat Eaters: The Vegetarians Survival Handbook Reviews

• 
  Jen

  I attempted to read this years ago. When I cleaned out my cookbook shelf I found it again and started to read it. I did find that many of the anecdotes that people shared throughout the book did resonate with my own. It definitely is hard to be a vegetarian at times. I've chosen this lifestyle for many reasons: health, caring about animals, and the dislike of the taste of meat.
  
  The book did get me to reflect on why I've made this choice. It also asked me to consider how my choice has impacted my family and others. I agree that many of the reactions I receive about being vegetarian come from other's lack of education about the veg lifestyle. I'm often asked about where I get my protein, when in fact I doubt many people could even state how much protein they eat a day.
  
  There are days that I do wish my husband was vegetarian but I definitely feel that he is a strong supporter of my lifestyle. He takes time to separate his meat products from the rest of the food in the fridge and more often he is eating the vegetarian meals than meat.
  
  The best I can say about this book is it did make me reflect about my own vegetarianism. The author does raise some interesting ideas about all people are just "blocked" vegetarians and why others react the way they do to vegetarians. There are many times when well meaning friends make insensitive comments about my diet but I truly just put it down to lack of education and empathy not guilt or being blocked.
  
  The writing style itself is probably why I did not finish the book the first time. I felt that the author brought the same issues up over and over without much in the way of new information. Perhaps its because I had already thought about some of the information she shared but there were times when I felt she was phrasing statements the same as the chapter before.
• 
  Shawna

  While some aspects of this book can be handy, such as recognizing the body language of someone who is trying to bait a vegan into having a fight, other aspects of it aren't so hot.
  
  There are two scenarios presented where vegans are put in situations where they have to suffer in silence around insensitive omnivores, and the recommended way of handling things is to remain silent and not say anything.
  
  When someone says, "Are you a vegetarian or WHAT," and the vegan stammers, hems, and haws, then makes up a lie about how her entire family eats the way she does after her father had a heart attack, it puts the omnivores at ease, and she denied a very important aspect of her lifestyle because she was being questioned by clients.
  
  Frankly, all I took away from this book is that we are supposed to lie or avoid the subject in order to win friends and influence omnivores. There are ways of handling things without being combative, and without lying or suffering in silence. This book doesn't explore those options deeply enough.
• 
  Lisa Vegan

  Best vegan support book I've read, especially regarding how to cope with an overwhelmingly non-vegan world. Helpful for vegans to read before holidays, family gatherings, etc. If you like this book, also highly recommended is Vegan Freak by Bob & Jenna Torres.
• 
  Jo ☾

  I didn't enjoy this book as much as I had hoped to.. for a couple of reasons. The main thesis of this book centers around the authors opinion that all meat eaters are "blocked vegetarians" with a hole in their conscience. I don't really agree with that. On the other hand, I do agree with the idea that all meat eaters are potential vegetarians.. but the way the author clung to this idea throughout the book sort of bothered me. I found it a little condescending and definitely a bit repetitive. I feel like I probably would have enjoyed this book more if I had read it when I first became vegetarian, but after 7 years of being veg, I think I've already found ways to deal with a lot of these issues. With that being said though, there are some great resources in this book and I did find the last two chapters especially helpful. Also, some of the suggestions on how to deal with certain questions meat eaters like to ask might come in handy. Especially the "..but where do you get your protein?" question. I get asked this ALL the time and I still have to fight the urge to stab people with my fork when they ask me. ;)
  
  There was one section in particular that I could really relate to. The author talks about how she realized she needed to take her life as a vegan more seriously and that's something I really need to do myself.
  
  "First I had to recognize that no one could meet my needs but myself." Yes, yes, yes.. once you realize and understand this, you can begin to take charge of how you live your life. Research all you can about veganism, begin to gather recipes and resources, learn how to cook, learn different cooking techniques and about the many different vegan options/ingredients available, etc.. this is what I personally need to master and I appreciate this book for pointing that out to me. :) I'm a lazy vegan and maybe this book will be the kick in the pants I need to work on that.
  
  The final chapter is full of recipes. None of them really jumped out at me or seemed particularly special but I did bookmark a handful that sound tasty.
  
  Overall, I can see how this book would be a wonderful resource to a new vegetarian. There's a great letter at the end of the book to "Parents of Vegetarians" which is excellent and should be really helpful for teens making the switch, especially if their parents are a bit resistant to the idea.
• 
  Nan

  I read this book before going to visit cattle-raising, hunting, fishing, meat-loving in-laws. I was hoping for some guidance about negotiating meals with folks who honestly are completely puzzled about why one would opt to not eat meat. The book was pretty condescending to omnivores describing them as "blocked vegetarians." It assumed all veggie love was based on a profound love of animals. People are vegetarian for a lot of different reasons. The book encouraged not discussing one's choice to not eat "flesh" during meal times. This, of course, happens to vegetarians or people who have lots of food allergies or refuse to eat green things all the time. Shutting the conversation down doesn't seem polite or useful.
• 
  Corvus

  Decent, rational advice that still applies today despite being written 18 years ago. It helped me feel more at peace with some compromises I begrudgingly have to make in order to exist in this world. She offers a wide range of options. It leans toward nonconfrontation at times in ways some people may find too lenient. But, as a vegan of about 14 years, I can say that nonconfrontation is sometimes the only way to exist in this world of extreme exploitation and oppression without constantly being isolated or in tears.
• 
  Jilly

  I loved this book! It has so many great suggestions and helpful tips. This would have been so handy at any point in my life, but particularly since I've been a vegetarian; I wish I had read it years ago! But I am grateful to have benefitted from its wisdom now. It is not only great for dealing with meat-eaters, but it has so many great ways to communicate more positively and productively with others in every area of life. I HIGHLY RECOMMEND THIS BOOK!
• 
  Olivia

  Other than one or two useful tips and a few good recipes, I found the tone of the entire book a little condescending and the writing was extremely repetitive.
• 
  hey.emily

  I read this genuinely unable to believe that there are people who would do things like feed a vegetarian teenager veal tortellini to "prove" that they would "enjoy" it. I'm sure they are out there, but this kind of felt like an urban legend, or an exceptionally cruel and judgmental parent. I've run into some of the circumstances described in this book, such as asked why I don't eat meat and then being reacted to as if I were lecturing, when I was in reality just answering a question. However, most of this seemed very outlandish and condescending. The author lives in Texas, in ranch country, and I live in a major metropolitan area on the East Coast, so maybe they are more used to vegetarians out here? Anyway - A few of the recipes in the back were pretty tasty too; it's worth checking out for some of the tofu recipes.
• 
  Peacegal

  This is my favorite vegetarian book, and one of my favorite books, period. Adams is a gentle guide through the many "dangerous waters" veg*ns must navigate through, from Thanksgiving dinner with the extended family to business lunches at a steakhouse. It offers tips for graceful responses that even an ultra-shy person like me can handle. Every veg*n should read this book.
• 
  V Massaglia

  A very approachable book that will help build confidence and reinforces my decision. I like the non-judgment approach.
  
  V
• 
  Michelle

  The advice felt a little outdated and repetitive, but I still found parts of it useful, and I liked that a bunch of recipes were included in the back of the book.
• 
  Christopher

  I keep looking for a book for vegetarians and for pseudo-vegetarians and for omnivores who would like to understand vegetarianism but can't get past the dogma of groups like PETA. This is not that book. Not that the author is completely polarizing - she tries her best to bring balance to her meatless beat manifesto - but I couldn't help but attempt to read her book through the filter of a non-vegetarian, and more often than not I picked up on a condescending tone that I'm not sure is completely productive to building the bridges for a vegetarian life in a non-vegetarian society. The book truly is well-meaning, with lots of recipes and practical information about nutrition - I will be keeping it on my bookshelf as a resource for a long time to come - but I guess if I'm looking for the feel-good book of a lifetime for veggies and the people who love 'em (or hate to love 'em), I'm going to have to pen it myself.
• 
  Renata

  OK, I really enjoyed the experience of reading this book, having recently moved to an area that's not very vegetarian-friendly. Reading it was like, "Ahhh, someone understands me! But also this person is maybe kind of off the deep end about all of this!" I definitely do NOT recommend even touching this book if you are not vegetarian or vegan because it is extremely patronizing toward meat eaters. But if you are a vegetarian and are a li'l tired of being patronized by meat eaters it might be enjoyable to covertly read this.
  
  Also this book is from 2002 and not all of it has aged well; eg it keeps advising the reader to offer to fax their friends vegetarian info sheets. It does have some good conversational strategies for how to get through meals without making anybody feel bad, which is mostly what I wanted from this book. Hooray!
• 
  Paula

  I enjoyed reading the book, but it had its flaws. First, it was repetitive, which is annoying. Second, many of the "solutions" seem passive aggressive rather than helpful. She basically advises us to never talk about veganism during mealtime, particularly when others are eating meat, or whenever anyone is questioning about veganism in an aggressive way. I was hoping for some gentle way to talk about it, rather than suggestions to not talk at all. However, I do love that she views all meat eaters as "blocked vegetarians." That certainly defines me before we changed our diet. I think most people probably want to at least eat more vegetables as well as less meat, and would enjoy learning how, though they may be intimidated by complete conversion to a plant-based diet.
• 
  Rachel Rose

  This book was very repetitive at times. I would have probably found it more useful when I first became a vegan 10 years ago. A person in their teens or early 20s would benefit more from this book.
  Although reading this did provide me with empathy at certain points, I think Adams is WAY too generous in her assumption that people in opposition to veganism are just blocked vegetarians. The recipes which take up almost the last half of the book are outdated at this point.
  I still appreciate the author and the many other books she has written about vegan feminism.
• 
  Katherine

  I read this a long time ago, and honestly I guess I'm back to what Adams calls a "blocked vegetarian" (i.e., omnivore), but I remember this as a very thoughtful, reassuring, and comprehensive guide. It's not about why or how-to become vegetarian/vegan, but what to do afterwards. And the recipe section is great, at least the ones I've tried so far; lots of good ones for mixed veg*n/omni crowds--I've made the chocolate cream pie MANY times!
• 
  Jukka

  Living Among Meat Eaters - Carol Adams
  I found this book very good. It helped me to understand the reactions of others to my vegan choice. As for instance her concept of ‘blocked' vegetarians is especially iluminating, and as i have found very common.
  
  Adams also wrote Pornography of Meat which i found interesting and provocative, though i think she is stretching things a little at times, which is actually just fine.
• 
  Emily

  This is "one of those books" that's hard to rate because while I found some of the information really helpful, other stuff was not. That will probably be the case for any veg*ns that read this book. I wish I'd read it sooner, though, because I think it really does help to outline responses to those strange or rude questions we get, without making the situation into a conflict or totally derailing the conversation.
• 
  Heidi

  Great book. Balanced, super-thoughtful advice for responding to criticism and comments from meat lovers, and suggestions about being kind and responsive of meat eaters' fears and feelings about vegetarianism in general.
• 
  ♡ Lisa ♡

  This book points out some excellent ways to deflect animosity from non-vegetarians! Somehow, though, I found my interest waning towards the end and couldn't manage to finish it completely.
• 
  Tina

  I recommend this book for all vegans.