| Title | : | Thats Not What Happened |
| Author | : | |
| Rating | : | |
| ISBN | : | 1338186523 |
| ISBN-10 | : | 9781338186529 |
| Language | : | English |
| Format Type | : | Hardcover |
| Number of Pages | : | 336 |
| Publication | : | First published August 28, 2018 |
But it's not true.
I know because I was with her when she died. I didn't say anything then, and people got hurt because of it. Now Sarah's parents are publishing a book about her, so this might be my last chance to set the record straight . . . but I'm not the only survivor with a story to tell about what did--and didn't--happen that day.
Except Sarah's martyrdom is important to a lot of people, people who don't take kindly to what I'm trying to do. And the more I learn, the less certain I am about what's right. I don't know what will be worse: the guilt of staying silent or the consequences of speaking up . . .
Thats Not What Happened Reviews
-
Huge thanks to the student that added this on Goodreads!
Having donated other Keplinger books to their classroom library, I was particularly excited to see this on a To-Read shelf, so I quickly ordered a copy to donate. When it arrived, I realized I really needed to read it. Right now, before it even made it to the classroom. And it was amazing and awe-inspiring and thought-provoking and I cannot wait to hear students' thoughts. -
Inspired by the story of Cassie Bernall after Columbine, Keplinger's book is a story about who controls the narrative in the aftermath of tragedy. It's a searing exploration of voice: who has it and who has it taken from them.
Lee -- who is asexual -- begins the story three years after a surviving a school shooting. It's just her and five others, though only four others are still around. One of them, Kellie, left town before the school reopened following the tragedy. Kellie, however, will end the story.
After the shooting, Lee's best friend Sarah becomes a martyr. She was, of course, wearing a cross and proclaimed she believed in God when she was shot. But...that wasn't the truth of the matter, and that truth is something Lee kept secret for years. It turns out, though, telling people the truth of what happened matters deeply to her, and it's also nearly impossible to do. Who does that truth serve? And who does it hurt?
This is a complex, layered book, and Lee herself is a complex, layered character. Her desire to do right and set the record straight is utterly admirable, but there's a lingering question in the back of the reader's mind as to why. What purpose does it serve? Who does it save? Does it cause more harm than good?
That's where Kellie comes in. Kellie, the gothy outcast girl who was also a survivor of the shooting, ends up being a pivotal character in the story, but her voice is relatively absent. And it's this, in this very decision, Lee recognizes she has done precisely what it is she hoped she was fixing in the first place.
Powerful. Timely. Moving. This is fast-paced, engaging, and emotionally gripping. There aren't easy answers here, and that's what makes the fact it's based on reality even more resonant. This is a book about voice and power, about the stories we tell and hear in the wake of something as horrible as a school shooting. But it goes even wider, too: it's about who we silence in any tragedy, in any social movement, and who, ultimately, GETS to be the one to direct the story.
My only wish is race had been explored a little bit more here, though Denny's voice here is absolutely necessary. He's black and blind, one of the two black students in the rural school and certainly the only blind one. The book includes one of his scholarship essays, which digs into not wanting to be seen as a hero for being either. If race could have been explored more, this book would have been even more powerful than it already is.
That said: what Keplinger DOES do here that so few do is write about rural communities with a clear compassion for them. This is small town life. It's not glamorous, nor is it something to scoff at. It's reality for so many kids, and I can see readers seeing themselves here. That both gives me heart and gives me heartache.
Don't sleep on this one. -
“Sometimes it’s okay to believe things that aren’t true. Sometimes it’s necessary.”
I have been a Kody Keplinger fan since The DUFF, which still finds its way into my re-read rotation. Ms. Keplinger’s characters, banter, intelligence, and strong messages that tie right into current events and moods make her one of my favorite voices. But That’s Not What Happened did not work for me.
Three years ago, 6 teenagers survived a school shooting at Virgil County High School. This is their story. Their truth. Leanne (Lee) Bauer guides us through by telling us how life for her and the other survivors—Ashley, Eden, Denny, Kellie, and Miles--is now and was three years ago. Lee’s main goal is to correct a rumor that grew and grew into an uncontrollable beast of a story. The story of a girl and her cross. The truth got lost somehow. People didn’t want the scary, ugly truth. They wanted something inspiring to believe in. They wanted something to battle the pain and confusion they were all feeling after the shooting. The story about Sarah, Lee’s best friend, and her cross is not true. Lee knows it, but is it too late to fix the past and everyone’s thoughts on what happened that day? What if everyone wants to believe the lie instead? Will the truth change anything?
“How do you tell someone that something they were so sure of, something that was profound and meaningful to them, wasn’t real?”
I loved the idea of this book very much. Truth is a hard thing to maintain in our society with so many media outlets reporting and publishing on the spot. Rumors are printed as facts. Interviews are held in time of stress, shock, and pain. The “truth” seems to change minute by minute. Things are said and lost and circulated that are just not true. And then those “true” things are remembered and talked about and not corrected. It’s scary and more often than not devastating to a town, individual, or investigation. This book picks away at that idea, but in my opinion, does not deliver the big emotional wallop. I was told again and again what happened, but I didn’t feel invested or involved. The way the story unfolds in letters and time flips prevented me from really getting to know or like these characters. Lee is a very unlikeable character actually. The way she bullies a couple of her fellow survivors to tell and share their truth felt very ugly to me. Just because she was finally ready to talk doesn’t mean everyone was ready. Sadly I just didn’t feel connected to any of the characters in the mix. Which to be honest—kind of scared me. Am I too hardened by real life events to feel any of this? I hope not. I think the format prevented me from wholeheartedly climbing in and getting lost in the book. Like the quick, little stories and details about the individuals killed in the shooting—they didn’t feel folded in or part of the story. They felt more stuck in here & there during the course of the story. The different pieces and voices just didn’t come together for me here.
Kody Keplinger will forever be on my must-read list, but I would recommend checking this one out at your local Library first. It lacked the emotional punch and meaning I usually adore from a Keplinger read.
**Quotes taken from ARC** -
TÁTO KNIHA NIE JE NIČ Z TOHO, ČO SA VÁM AMERICKÁ ANOTÁCIA SNAŽÍ NAKECAŤ.
Masaker na strednej škole, tajomstvo za smrťou najlepšej kamarátky, odhaľovanie minulosti, ktorá môže všetko zmeniť, atď atď atď... NIE. Celú americkú anotáciu môžete rovno chytiť a zahodiť do koša, lebo ňou chce vydavateľ akurát tak zahrať na city publiku, aby si kúpili knihu o nejakej aktuálnej a tragickej téme s nádychom záhady a množstva emotívnych scén. Nie. Nie. NIE.
Anotácia v mojom prevedení:
Ubehli tri roky od streľby na miestnej strednej škole a rodičia jednej z obetí vydávajú dcérinu autobiografiu. Sarah totiž zomrela inak ako ostatné deti, pretože ju strelec zabil len preto, že mala v ruke kresťanskú retiazku s krížikom. Sarahina najlepšia kamoška Lee však vie, že to ANI NÁHODOU nie je pravda - pretože Sarah bola v skutočnosti rebelka, ktorej viera nič nehovorila. A keby sa dozvedela, aká mučeníčka sa z nej stala, zúrila by.
Lee sa teda rozhodne, že to nemôže nechať tak - a začne zháňať ostatných ľudí, ktorí v ten deň ako zázrakom prežili, aby spolu "vybalansovali" klamstvo, čo okolo Sarah vzniklo. Ibaže ubehli tri roky, polovica je už zo strednej preč, tej druhej sa o dni streľby nechce rozprávať... a Lee sa musí zamyslieť, či vlastne svojim rozhodnutím jatriť staré rany ľuďom skôr neublíži.
A o tomto ta kniha je. Nie o tom, čo sa stalo vtedy. Ale o tom, čo sa deje teraz.
A HOLY FUCK, TOTO ŽE NAPÍSALA KODY KEPLINGER!?
Táto kniha je totiž ÚPLNE iná, ako máte Kody Keplinger zafixovanú. Úplne. Ak by na obálke nesvietilo jej meno, neverila by som, že tento toto napísala ona.
Ak by som ju totiž mala k niečomu prirovnať, bolo by to Mŕtve dievča neklame - kde takisto skladáte mozaiku niečoho, o čom viete, že sa to už stalo, len nepoznáte všetky uhly pohľadu. Táto kniha nie je o masakre pri streľbe, ale o tom, že sa niečo také v minulosti stalo a nejakým spôsobom to hrdinov poznamenalo.
A Kody Keplinger to dáva úplne bravúrne. Lee hľadá svojich bývalých spolužiakov a postupne ukazuje, akým smerom sa ich život posunul, a každá z týchto mini-epizódiek je skvelá, pútavá a jedinečná. Chcem to zdôrazniť ešte raz - príbeh nie je o tom, že Leeina kamarátka mala nejaké strašné tajomstvo, ako naznačuje anotácia. Príbeh je o tom, ako po troch rokoch od traumatizujúcej udalosti žijú rôzni ľudia.
Táto kniha je pre ľudí, ktorí majú radi dobre spracované vážne príbehy so silnou atmosférou. Asi by som mala povedať, že je preto trochu pomalá - ale na druhú stranu som ju zhltla behom dvoch dní, lebo ma tak chytila, že som NEVEDELA PRESTAŤ. Len vďaka tomu, aké silné postavy ponúkla. A ako je fantasticky napísaná.
Nie je to vaša typická Kody Keplinger, ale podľa mňa je to to najlepšie, čo autorka napísala. A jednoznačne moja TOP kniha tohto roka. -
Eh...
This was an okay read. Yes, yes, call me cold-hearted for not enjoying a book about the aftermath of a school shooting. The thing is, while the situation itself is very traumatic, the writing didn't make me care about the characters, or what happened to them. To be honest, not even the mistery around the shooter's identity gripped me. Also, I was led to believe the secret that Lee was going to reveal would be much bigger. -
I really liked the concept of this and thought the author did an excellent job of focusing on the victims and not the shooter.
The fact that she blurred the name of the shooter in particular was a great move.
I read this very quickly and did enjoy it however overall it was pretty middle of the road for me. -
actual rating: 3.5/5 stars
This book was very heavy and is very relevant to whats happening this days in America which is sad and i have a feeling more books like this will be coming up more.
Plot: this book follows six teenagers who all survived a school shooting that happened three years prior to this book starting. We follow the lives of Leanne *lee*, Ashley, Eden, Miles, Denny and Kellie as they try continue their lives after all living through this terrible incident. So books likes this are always going to be hard to read about because there so relevant for most of America these days.
Lee's main goal all throughout the story is her trying to 'expose' the truth about what really happened during the school shooting surrounding the death of her best friend Sarah who was unfortunately was killed during the shooting. There are so many different lies spread and events are all changed because of things that were either misheard or changed.
However the lies that have been spread about this story is how Sarah apparently spoke to the shooter and used her 'cross necklace' and her faith in the moments before she died. However this story is proven to be wrong but Lee couldn't tell the truth at the time because she was still in shock but now things are messy then ever before.
Characters:
Leanne 'Lee' : The main focus of the story is on Lee because it was her best friend who was shot during the school shooting and she was also in the bathroom at the time and knows the truth about what really happened. I thought Lee was an alright main character but she did annoy me at times especially when she would push people to tell their side of the stories and get them to write the stories because she wanted to get this story out there.
However i did feel extremely sorry for her during the book because she had to endure people attacking her and calling her names because she ended up telling Sarah's parents the truth about what happened but they didn't take this well. Lee does go through so much during the book with dealing with the shooting 3 years on and the abuse from people around the town but also coming to terms with being asexual and how much that effects her relationships with people.
It was really brave of Lee to give Kellie full reigns on the story at the end of the book because that showed so much character growth on Lee's part but also settled things between the two after so many years.
Miles: Miles is the trouble kid and the typical 'bad boy' representation of the book but after the school shooting he begins to clean up his act and focus on putting his studies and future first. It was kind of refreshing to see this type of character totally clean up their act even after a huge traumatic event.
Miles also has a hard time opening up to people and letting people in to his life just a little bit and it's shown with Lee with how these two first interact after the shooting and i loved how they slowly got to know each other with first meeting properly on the roof as they helped each other out. However after much trouble and bugging on Lee's part Miles does finally write his letter telling his truth and i found it really impactful.
Denny: Denny is one of my favourite characters from this book and him being blind makes him even cooler. Denny was in the schools computer lab during a class when the shooter came into the class killing nearly every single student and the teacher but Denny was very lucky to have survived the shooting.
Denny goes through the story dealing with this tragedy in his own way and he uses his story to help in the college application process but stresses the fact they choose him for his brains not him being a survivor of a school shooting and i found this really smart and powerful. I liked how close Lee, Denny and Miles all become after the events because they could all lean on each other to help them if they really needed it.
Ashley: I'm not sure if this was just me but i found Ashley to be extremely annoying and it really took me out the story and what this character had been through. Ashley is the one who thought she heard Sarah standing up to the shooter and tells people the story which comes the main focus of the story. But one thing that really annoyed me is that Ashley was blaming everyone else for the entire thing but not really blaming herself for the story going around and becoming so big and then decides to hide behind her religion and faith.
The scene where Lee tells Ashley what really happened and then Ashley decides to throw it back in her face even though Lee herself says she's half to blame. Ashley should have taken some of the blame for this story going around and should have stood up and said something.
Eden: Eden is a little bit older than the other characters and is half way through her college part of her schooling and is still hugely effected by the school shooting. However Eden has the help of her girlfriend and roommate but things don't turn out exactly happy for Eden.
Eden reveals to Lee that she is struggling with alcoholism after the traumatic experience of the school shooting. Eden was in the school's computer lab when nearly all her classmates and teacher were killed leaving her one of the sole survivors that wasn't shot. I liked how it was revealed that Eden was struggling with being in the shadow of her cousin who was top of her classes and the 'better' person out of the two however Eden loses her cousin in the school shooting.
Kellie: Kellie is the outcast gothic girl who was also in the bathroom on the day the school shooting happened. Kellie is one is the huge missing pieces and voices from this story because she too also knows what really happened in the bathroom at the time of the shooting. I really liked Kellie in the book even though her part is so small its one of the most important voices in the entire book.
Lee does try and reach out to Kellie via phone calls, texts and emails but they all go ignored by Kellie because she doesn't want to relive the shooting again. Kellie was hit hardest after the events of the shooting with the entire town turning against her because she said the cross necklace was hers and not Sarah's but the story with Sarah sparked hope and restored peoples faith in religion so Kellie was told she was spreading lies which resulted in her entire family having to flee town.
Kellie was such an important character in this whole story i just wished she got some more time on the page because i would have connected more if this was the case.
Kody does an excellent job at writing about small towns which is something i don't know about cause i live in the suburban area. But this book also taught me how much people will hang on to one story and how much of an impact social media/ the news will turn stories and have everyone give their own opinions without listening to the survivors themselves.
It's also weird how in this book Kody touches on the fact that the entire country thought that these kids were all just crisis actors playing a role. It's sad because this did happen in real life when the Marjory Stoneman Douglas high school students were all called 'crisis actors' and it goes to show how much of an effect this would have on survivors of this.
However this book just lacked depth and that emotional range that i was really wanting to come out of this story because i just couldn't connect that much and the story just felt a little flat for me. -
I didn't even KNOW Kody Keplinger had a new book releasing holy shit
-
this really lacked depth honestly
review to come -
i think the individual stories of some of the survivors were more interesting than the main conflict/plot
i know i was supposed to be touched by the necklace storyline and to see it as this huge thing but all i could think was "seriously?"
honestly, this Christian town was insane for treating that girl that way
overall an alright read but other than that *shrug*. i know i will never think about this book ever again -
Mini review:
DNF
Trigger Warning: Trauma from school shooting. Up till the point I read.
I am a huge fan of Kody Keplinger! When I heard about this book I was so psyched. Unfortunately I didn't enjoy it.
Upon starting the book I realized that the story wasn't for me. I did some skimming and couldn't connect to any off the characters. After that I lost interest in the book.
I do still recommend. I think this book is really important. Just wasn't for me. -
4.5 stars
First, before I get into my thoughts on such an intense and powerful read, I have to put a disclaimer out there. As stated, this book is an intense and difficult read containing many triggers that necessitate a trigger warning. Some of these warnings are around topics such as: PTSD, Depression, Anxiety, Drug and Alcohol Abuse, and Gun Violence. This list of warnings are just a brief list of some of the topics involved in this novel and if you are concerned with reading this book, I suggest to read a few different reviews and do your research prior to reading. It's better to be safe than sorry so if you are worried about your reaction to this book: do your research first.
With that disclaimer aside, I have to say that although this was an extremely difficult story, it was very powerful and important. It exposes a topic and situation that unfortunately is becoming more and more frequent in the world that we live in. It's a fictional story that is terrifyingly realistic.
In regards to this novel, and the topic in general, I think many people will have varying opinions. There are multiple discussions that can be created from a story like this whether it be surrounding gun violence and gun laws or the discussion surrounding the motivation/factors of that individual who committed this violence. It's a very, in-depth and controversial topic that many people have different opinions on.
Overall, I think it's an extremely important read that is also very thought provoking. It's painfully emotional and very powerful but at its core it's just so important because these stories need to be told in the hopes that someday there will be a change.
***Thank you to Scholastic Canada for sending me an ARC of this novel in exchange for an honest review*** -
20. dubna 1999 zabili dva střelci na střední škole v Coloradu dvanáct dalších lidí, většinou svých spolužáků. Mezi nimi i sedmnáctiletou Cassie Bernallovou, která se schovávala v knihovně. Po masakru se začala šířit zpráva, že se střelec Cassie zeptal, zda věří v boha, na což ona odpověděla "Ano" a následně byla zastřelena. Později se však ukázalo, že to neřekla Cassie, ale jiná dívka, která přežila, i tak byla ale Cassie mnohými považována za mučednici, světici.
Tohle se skutečně stalo. Kody Keplinger napsala bezmála dvacet let poté, kdy už takový masakr nebyl jediný svého druhu, knihu inspirovanou těmito událostmi. Hlavní hrdinka Lee přežila právě takový masakr a viděla zemřít svou nejlepší kamarádku Sarah. Sarah se střelcem údajně mluvila a postavila se za svou víru. Ale... Lee u toho byla a ví, že to není pravda. Teď, tři roky poté, si Lee a několik dalších přeživších stále nesou následky onoho dne a Lee uvažuje, jestli by se neměla ozvat, jestli by neměla všem říct, jak to bylo doopravdy. Jenže to vypadá, že pravdu nikdo nechce slyšet.
Tahle kniha je tak neuvěřitelně americká. Nejde jen o to střílení ve školách, to by ještě šlo. Jenže pak je tu ta víra. Protože kdyby se něco takového odehrálo tady, tak by Lee prostě mohla říct: Hele, Sarah ve skutečnosti nic takového neřekla, nebyla žádná mučednice, měla kluka, nosila na tajňačku make-up a chtěla se stát modelkou. A všichni by řekli, aha, tak jo. Jenže místo toho jste v Americe. A kdo chce sebrat lidem jejich krásnou historku o zbožné, hodné holčičce, která se postavila vrahovi, tak ten lže a přijde do pekla.
Přesně proto nemám ráda církve. Víra je fajn, věřte si, v co chcete, ale církve dávají lidem do rukou nástroj k tomu, aby se seskupovali a odsuzovali lidi, kteří nejsou přesně podle jejich představ. Jasně, ne všichni, to je samozřejmé, všichni takoví nejsou. Ale je toho dost a vždycky mě to štvalo. Ježíš říká, milujte všechny – ale tebe ne, ty jsi gay, ty přijdeš do pekla. Takoví lidé pak překrucují svou víru podle toho, co se jim hodí do krámu. A o Americe se to ví (takové ty články o tom, jak se nějaká kongregace sešla a spálila Harryho Pottera, protože čarodějnictví je přece hřích), ale mám pocit, že teprve tahle kniha mi pomohla pochopit, do jaké míry je to tam i dnes zakořeněné. Nejen upjaté paničky v domácnostech, které snad nemají co na práci, tak pálí knížky a bojují proti potratům. Ale i teenageři. Z mojí perspektivy je to až neuvěřitelné (protože přiznejme si to, tady v Čechách budou spíš házet krokety po tom, kdo v boha věří, než po tom, kdo ne), ale stejně jsem tomu při čtení dost věřila.
Takže celkem hustá kniha. A ještě abych se vrátila k tomu střílení... hrozně se mi líbí dvě věci: za prvé jak to vůbec není o tom, proč to ten střelec udělal, ale o obětech. Střelec nestojí autorce ani za zmínku jména. Tak co, že měl možná komplikovaný život, že ho šikanovali. Možná jo a možná ne. To ale nikomu nedává právo vzít do rukou zbraň. Je to padouch, ne oběť.
A druhá věc je to, že se kniha snaží vykreslit oběti, jak přeživší, tak zemřelé, jako lidi, ne jako světce. Ano, ten a ten je mrtvý, ale ke mně se choval jako kretén. Ano, měla jsem ji ráda, ale občas mě pěkně štvala. Je to takové upřímné. -
I liked the approach of this a lot - viewing a school shooting years later to pull apart the truths of it - and the fact that there was this whole friend group created with a unique bond as a result. It was definitely a fast read, too. For me, what didn't work quite as well, which I wanna discuss not to criticize the book (which I quite liked, by the way) but because I think it's an interesting discussion, is the span of time between Sarah's death and the book shopping that's the catalyst for Lee's need to share her truth.
I recognize that a lot of the Sarah story is probably based on Rachel Scott, who was killed in Columbine. It took 2-3 years for her parents to start publishing books about her, and they kept on doing so right up through the 10th anniversary of Columbine. But 20 years later, as we've learned that Columbine wasn't a solitary horrific tragedy that would never repeat itself, and rather a horrific tragedy that would become a facet of American life for students in school, do I think one could or would wait three years to publish a book on a single victim? I don't. And to me, putting this 2018 book on the same timeline as Columbine was a missed opportunity to show the ways America has changed, including the way we consume media about the survivors, in addition to just feeling unlikely. So while I really appreciate the approach of viewing the aftermath and facts of a shooting and how much they change in a few years, this felt to me like it was about a 1999 shooting, and not a 2018 one. I think it would've made for a great historical (yes, we're calling 1999 historical now), but I'd still love to read the version of this book that I think would more accurately portray how it plays out in 2018, and especially in the current political climate.
(One more thing I appreciated: the conscientious choice to keep the shooter's name out of it. It wasn't even so much that I liked or disliked the choice as that it was chosen, if that makes sense. Reminded me a little bit of the approach in Corey Haydu's THE CAREFUL UNDRESSING OF LOVE.)
Anyway, I do recommend the book; I just think it's trying to capture a reality that's two decades behind us instead of the one right in front of us.
Also, heads-up for those looking for ace rep - this one has an on-page ace MC. -
Very interesting look at the truth behind a school shooting. Not at the shooter, whose name is never printed and whose motivations are never listed- because it's not about him. (I really liked that.) Instead, this is about the truth of the survivors: how they're doing months/years later. What they were doing at the time of the shooting. And how the truth about the victims gets skewed to fit the hero narrative. Some of the kids who died were jerks. One of the teachers was really great, but told the most terrible jokes and would snort when she laughed at her own dumb punchlines. And one of the victims has become a martyr, erasing the real person she was.
It could come off as bitter, but doesn't, instead it's honest and real. It's very much a book of our time, sadly, but without falling to sensationalism or morbidity.
The one thing that bothered me was that the subplot about a character's sexuality really felt shoehorned in. I mean, it wasn't out of place, but it kept coming up and coming up even when there were other things going on. It should have been treated much more casually to make it a natural part of the character and the narrative, but it started to seem really infodumpy and made the story lose some of its natural forward momentum. -
10 out of 10
The author tells a simple story with simple words but nails it. I can understand each character, but as Kelly said not everyone deserves to be forgiven. And the shooter brought less negative feelings than some citizens. I think shooting concept is not the easiest to base your book upon, though Keplinger did it great. The story seems natural, very emotional read.
***
Книга о стрельбе в школе, о выживших, погибших, о последствиях. Написана очень здорово! Причем я долго не могла поверить, что Кеплингер и автор дурацкой «Простушки» — один человек.
Тот случай, когда история простая, но оторваться нельзя. И эмоции вызывает яркие! Моей, кстати, стала злость. На религиозную шумиху и конченых фанатиков в первую очередь. На тупость и нерациональность толпы.
Персонажи у Коди объемные, в чем-то нравятся, чем-то отталкивают, а это главное мерило реалистичности. Любителям хорошего контемпа рекомендую! -
What a book.
This is one of those books that I’m going to shove in every single person’s face because YOU HAVE TO READ IT. It’s a book that, like I Am Thunder, is so relevant to today’s world that everybody should read it. It’s completely heartbreaking, and I’m not lying when I say that I had a box tissues next to me, but I absolutely loved it.
What it’s About
Three years ago, Lee’s best friend, Sarah, was killed in the Virgil County High School mass shooting. Three years since Sarah died proclaiming her faith - only, she didn’t, and only Lee and one other survivor - Kelley - knows the truth about what happened. Now, after Sarah’s parents announce writing a book about their martyr daughter, Lee needs to set the record straight before the truth graduates with her. But Sarah’s story is important to a lot of people and their faith, and after running Kelley and her family out of town, they now set their sights on Lee, who is not only still struggling with the loss of her best friend, but also being the target of so much animosity in her town.
The Characters & Relationships
One thing that I genuinely can’t believe is how brilliant Kody Keplinger’s characters are. They are so unbelievably realistic, so flawed, that sometimes I actually had to remind myself that this book is fictional. Even the characters who were killed in the shooting, those who we’d never actually met, were so three dimensional that I mourned them. The love that their peers held for them, the little snippets of memories...it’s just so moving.
While this goes for all of the victims, it’s obviously more focused on Sarah, as she was Lee’s best friend. Lee’s love for Sarah is stuff that we can only dream of having; there was one quote about how Sarah didn’t have to die a martyr for her to be Lee’s hero that had me bawling. Everything that Lee does reminds her of Sarah, and it’s so heartbreaking that I’m tearing up just writing about it.
I also loved how Kody didn’t make all her characters be strong, speech-making activists; obviously there’s nothing wrong with that, but I appreciated the vulnerability, the different coping mechanisms shown. Everyone deals with things differently, whether that be through not talking about it, excessive drinking, or religion. Some people forgive, while others hold onto their anger.
While this book is predominately through Lee’s eyes, we do also get to read all six of the survivors’ letters, stating the truth from their point of view, which I loved, because it just highlights how the same event can be perceived differently by different people.
As well as the letters, we also get little snippets of memories focusing on each of the victims, whether they be students or teachers. And while you would expect all of the dead to be portrayed as perfect, they aren’t; none of them are put up on pedestals, and the survivors straight up say if they acted like arseholes at some point. Just because they didn’t deserve to die doesn’t mean that they weren’t awful people at some point or other in their life.
The Verdict
I honestly can’t recommend this book enough. I cried on page 15, and I cried on and off for the rest of the book. There wasn’t one time I sat down to read it that I didn’t cry; it’s so incredibly moving.
I genuinely haven’t mourned a fictional character as much as I mourn Sarah since Sam Cortland from Throne of Glass. Which is mental, considering I only ever got glimpses of Sarah through Lee after she’d gone, but that’s how brilliant Kody is.
This is my first book by her, but it definitely won’t be my last. I might just need to wait until my emotions have recovered from this book before I read any more of her books, though.
*I received a free copy of this book via the publisher - this by no means affected my review* -
Najlepšia kniha za august 2021?
Táto. Rozhodne táto.
Na mojom
instagrame som sa vás pýtala, že aké poznáte dobré YA thrillery a párkrát sa tam objavila knižka Bolo to úplne inak. Zhodou okolností (ďakujem Evi!) som ju mala doma, takže som sa hneď do nej pustila. A po dočítaní vám musím povedať, že sa mi zastavuje rozum pri tom, prečo ju neprečítalo viac ľudí.
Knižka spracováva tak skvelo túto tému - a to tým, že sa na celú túto situáciu pozerá z úplne iného pohľadu. To ako obete sú vyčerpané celou to situáciou. Znie to tak obyčajne, ale doslova mne miestami takmer odpálilo dekel. Toľkokrát som mala zimomriavky pri čítaní, že sa mi ani nechcelo veriť, že sa to naozaj nestalo a je to fikcia. Ešte teraz ako o tom premýšľam, tak mi naskočila husia koža.
Postavy v tejto knihe sú neskutočne skvelo vykreslené. Realistické. Rôznorodé. S inými pohľadmi na celú vec. K tomu ani netreba viac dodať. Už len vďaka nim si zaslúži knižka 7 hviezdičiek.
Čo sa mi taktiež neskutočne páči je druhá vrstva príbehu (čo často chýba v YA). Nie je to len o streľbe na strednej škole. Hlavne prostredie vytvára "to navyše". Toto kresťanské mestečko a akýsi jeho opar, ktorý sa vznáša celou knižkou, stojí za povšimnutie.
Popravde, túto recenziu píšem po týždni od dočítania a stále som tú knihu celkom nespracovala. Neviem vyjadriť to všetko, všetky tie pocity, ktoré sa vo mne kumulujú. Ešte teraz sa nad ňou zamýšľam a hovorím si wau. Wau! Bolo to úplne inak je fantastický príbeh. Táto YA si zaslúži vašu pozornosť. -
OK so basically... Starting off... I DNFed this 😫
Rating: 1.25
I kinda read 55% bc I was I te rested and stuff and I thought the book was gonna get better... It didn't. I really had high hopes... Didn't reach my standards.
Anyways... Imma do a rant review of how much this book bored me... Won't be long... But it will be there... Soon
Moving on...the characters. Couldn't be more careless...
Moving on... The plot... Didn't see where it was going... Couldn't be more careless.
Moving on...i skilled to the last 2 pages... Probs my fav 2 pages of the whole 55% I read.
The only thing I acc liked...was the shooting... That was WiLd!! I also liked denny... He was just there with his blind ass and his dog. Literely. The dog made the whole book better. And denny cuz he said some weird joke from time to time... But yh... That was my weird review. Stay tuned for more and be expecting the rant review❤️
Cheerio 👋🏻 -
A very thought-provoking read.
What if you knew the absolute truth about a tragedy, a different story than the one everyone else believes? You know that revealing the truth will reopen old wounds, and possibly cost you some dear friendships. This is the situation that Lee, one of six people who survived a shooting at their high school, finds herself to be in three years later.
I read this in one sitting, because I couldn’t put it down.The pain of everyone involved was so aptly drawn, I kept wondering if the author had personally been through such an ordeal herself.
I would recommend this for high-school age readers. Obviously, though, this book would be full of possible triggers for someone who has experienced a mass shooting, so caution should be exercised. -
more disturbing than I thought it would be. It really dived into the horrors of surviving a school shooting. It does go into detail of the event which is going to give me nightmares tonight but I liked how much detail it went into!
Truly a disturbing read and it makes my heart hurt for all victims who have been killed and had their life cut short while at a place they felt safe at.
I didn't like some characters, they kind of took me out of the story a bit. I didn't like all the coincidences, it just wasn't realistic. I didn't like the romance but I loved the asexual rep! -
Do you remember the story of Cassie Bernall? I bet you do - she is the girl of "she said yes" fame, who was gunned down during the Columbine shooting but is more well-known for professing her devotion to God right before her death. While Columbine is now almost 20 years behind us, school shootings are more prevalent than ever, and the stakes continue to climb as gun control legislature is fought over tooth and nail by the US government.
Keplinger's book is quite timely, right in the face of all this anxiety and uncertainty. She takes this concept - this idea of one girl becoming a martyr for her religion - and reminds us that it can still happen today. It could happen to you, your children ... anyone, really.
Rating:
How I'd Describe This Book to a Friend
What if Cassie Bernall's mom got it all wrong, and her book turned out to be built on unintentional lies? What if the person who overheard Cassie confessing her belief in God heard wrong, and those words were wrong attributed? That's where the premise of this book draws its inspiration: what if what the world believed happened didn't really happen?
Lee is a survivor of the shooting at Virgil County High School - she, along with five of her peers, is trying to navigate the waters of recovery the best she can, three years out. But it's not as easy as it seems - she lost her best friend Sarah in the chaos while they were both crammed into a bathroom stall, clinging to each other. Yet from that moment burst forth a whole new movement - Sarah became a figurehead for her local church, for religion, when a rumor started circulating that she'd told the shooter she still believed in God. The only problem? Lee was right there, and Sarah didn't ever say a word.
We walk with Lee through her recovery, and feel as if we're there when the PTSD starts to close in over her head like an anxious ocean wave. And when Lee discovers that Sarah's parents are planning to release a book about their daughter's story and martyrdom, she decides enough is enough: she's got to tell the truth. Thing is ... people don't take kindly to it when others call them wrong. A fact Lee quickly realizes when Sarah's parents immediately oust her from their home upon hearing the truth of the situation.
Lee decides that if each survivor writes a letter, explains their side of the story, that maybe after she graduates her story will live on at Virgil County High - the true story. She is flummoxed to discover that not everyone wants to share their experience, however, and that we all have different ways of coping after such a massive incident. Lee quickly realizes that she needs to fully step up, or just sit back and let the false memories go - neither is a good idea, but what's the moral thing to do when your best friend would hate to know she's being held up this way?
The Bottom Line
There are some really great aspects of this book that help to differentiate it between every other school shooting YA fiction out there:
Lee is asexual, which we see come up as an issue when her senior prom arrives One of the survivors, Denny, is both African American and blind - a unique perspective This is perhaps my favorite of them all: we never learn the shooter's name. Not once do we learn any identifying information about them beyond the fact that it is a male. In places where the name has been written, it's blacked out and censored. We see so much about how we need to focus on the survivors of tragedies such as these, not the shooters - Keplinger really takes that to heart, and I appreciated it immensely.
So why only 3 1/2 stars? I liked the concept, enjoyed getting to know the characters, but I just didn't care for Lee as a person. She was selfish and stubborn and didn't seem to take anyone else's emotions into account before charging into a situation. She's not a bad person - she's seen some shit, after all - but she's just not that likable.
This is definitely a unique take on an unfortunately prevalent topic, and I would absolutely recommend it to anyone who works with teen populations, or wants to learn more about what it's like in the aftermath of a shooting - not during. -
Ho
Lee
Chit
I need a moment to let that all sink in. Plus, a warm blanket, a big plate of comfort food, a hug, and a kitty to purr for me.
Sweet Christmas that was intense, powerful, and necessary.
---------
Full review can be found here:
https://agingerlyreview.wordpress.com...
This is one of those books that while it is very difficult to get through because of the topic, it is still needed and necessary.
Short recap: Lee and five other students survived a horrific school massacre. Every year on the anniversary the survivors typically spend the day together talking about memories, thoughts, and feelings. There is one survivor that moved out of the city (run out of town is more like it) and refuses to talk about what happened. On the third anniversary, Lee wants the truth to be known about what really happened with her best friend, Sarah. Sarah did not survive the shooting and was made into a martyr for what was perceived to have been said by her. Lee wants everyone to know what really happened but are the other survivors ready to share their story?
This was a heavy story to get through. Keplinger covered some very serious topics and she did it better than I expected. I am not trying to be crass when I say that, it’s that I have read books with similar topics that were not handled as well as they were here. Kudos to Keplinger for writing a story that I feel is necessary and needed in YA lit today.
The protagonist, Lee, was a formidable character if I have ever one. I admired her guts and determination to have the truth be told about what really happened to her best friend. She stuck to her morals and did what she thought was necessary, regardless of what everyone thought. I cannot fault her for that.
There were times I had to put the book down and walk away because I was becoming frustrated with characters not wanting to accept the truth over their perception of what happened. Take Lee’s best friend’s family. They wanted to believe with every ounce of their being that their daughter was the martyr the media was making her out to be because clearly their daughter had to be perfect. The fact that they would not even take into consideration that their daughter could be anyone other than this perfect image, Lee was chastised by them. They even had the town gang up on Lee and harass her! Could you imagine? I was floored.
The one thing that stood out the most from this story is how the name of the shooter is never mentioned. The name was always blacked out because this wasn’t a story about that person, it was a story of survival and finding inner strength. Well done, Keplinger.
I know this is a bit of a choppy review and that is because it was a difficult one to write. I enjoyed this story a lot and I want to do it justice. I want you to be interested enough to give it a chance. It may be a fast read but it is certainly not a light read or an easy read. I had times I was upset and uncomfortable, but that proves this author knows how to write a captivating story. Please check this out if you have not already. -
"Nemyslím, že som v pohode.
A bojím sa."
Myslím, že viem, prečo som s recenziou otáľala tak dlho. Obávala som sa, že ani tie najdlhšie a najkomplikovanejšie vety nevyjadria to, čo mi táto kniha spravila.
Zničila ma.
Surovo. Do konca života, nenapraviteľne... a to na necelých 300 stranách.
Zoberme to ale krok za krokom, aby som nevyzerala, že preháňam. Niekedy to robím, avšak tento raz by som si len priala, aby to bolo zveličovanie.
Bolo to úplne inak je kniha, ktorá hovorí o piatich ľuďoch, ktorí prežili streľbu na škole. Žiadne tabu, ale smutná realita vo viacerých krajinách aj v súčastnosti. Nikto z nás si nedokáže predstaviť, čo sa im muselo preháňať hlavami, a tak sa nám to hlavná hrdinka, Lee, rozhodne sprostredkovať.
Po rokoch cíti ťažobu mlčania, a tak sa rozhodne prehovoriť a povedať pravdu, pretože príbeh, ktorému všetci veria, je lož. Niekedy ale stačí málo a aj z lži sa stane blažená pravda. Obzvlášť, keď sa jedná o dievča dvoch tvári.
Doteraz sa spamätávam z toho, čo v sebe kniha niesla. Nešlo len o Sarah a jej príbeh s retiazkou, ale o všetkých, ktorých ten deň ovplyvnil. Všetko sa točí okolo detí, ktoré nemali šancu byť normálnymi, pretože svet im to nedoprial.
"Udalosti vás môže traumatizovať aj bez toho, aby ste ich videli, ale väčšina bolesti a hrôzy prišla až potom."
Táto veta ma zamrazila až v kostiach, taká je skutočná. A jej obsah silný, no hlavne pravdivý.
Autorka pretkala knihu spomienkami na obete a taktiež doň zakomponovala výpovede piatich priateľov.
Poznáte ten pocit, keď čítate niečo silné, no zrazu pocítite prudkú silu v nose, a už sa vám po lícach kotúľajú slzy? OMG, priznám sa, že to som rozhodne pri čítaní nečakala.
Každý z hrdinov v ten osudný deň niekoho stratil. Denny prišiel o priateľov, Eden o sesternicu, Lee však nestratila len najlepšiu kamarátku, ale aj samú seba.
Roky sa obviňuje, že svetu nepovedala pravdu, no až keď sa o to pokúsi, okúsi, aké to je, keď vás svet jednoducho počúvať nechce. Čitateľ postupne odhaľuje celú pravdu za masakrom a zisťuje, že nie je všetko také jednoduché, ako sa na prvý pohľad zdá. Dokonca ani keď ide o vypovedanie pravdy. Lee sa však nevzdáva a postupne nám ukazuje nielen svoju vytrvalosť, ale aj schopnosť počúvať.
Veľmi sa mi páčil fakt, že hoci ústrednou postavou diela bola Lee, každá ďal��ia postava mala svoj príbeh a svoje problémy, s ktorými sa museli vyrovnať. Každý jeden sa vyrovnával s následkami po svojom najlepšie, ako vedeli, a mnohokrát si všetko nechávali pre seba. Aj preto sa mi toto dielo neskutočne páčilo, lebo poukazuje na to, aké dôležité a hlavne V PORIADKU je, ak požiadate niekoho o pomoc. Nemusí to byť rodina, ale pokojne terapeut, niekto, kto o vás bude vedieť len to, čo mu poviete.
Autorka vytvorila úžasný a hlavne srdcervúci príbeh o odhodlaní nájsť svoj hlas vo svete, kde ľudia nie sú ochotní počúvať. Dokázala, že skutočná sila nie je v počte tých, ktorí vás slepo nasledujú, ale v tom, čo je vo vnútri každého z nás. Pretože na konci dňa sme všetci len ľuďmi- robíme chyby, klameme, urážame a učíme sa.
Nie sme dokonalí a nikdy nebudeme.
_________________________________
ABSOLÚTNE nechápem, ako som mohla zabudnúť na recenziu k tejto knihe. Bola mega. Užila som si ju rovnako ako napríklad Veru Dietzovú alebo Jedno srdce, jedno telo, jeden svet a iné lakucinky od CooBoo...
Zajtra vám sem hodím celú recku, lebo na spísanie všetkého, čo mám na srdci, sa musím vrátiť ku knihe a jednotlivým kapitolám.
Za mňa ale veľký palec nahor! -
4.5 STARS
Who are we? To ourselves, to others. Are we whom we know ourselves to be, or are we the narratives people envision us to be?
THAT’S NOT WHAT HAPPENED examines a school shooting three years afterward from the perspective of Leanne and five other survivors of that fateful Ides of March. Lee knows the story that her best friend Sarah died proclaiming her love for god is false, paralleling the false narrative of Columbine victim Cassie Bernall, who people also falsely believed she died because of her beliefs. The truth that Cassie was rendered speechless from the bullets doesn’t matter to her parents or church members who used her as a source of inspiration. Sarah, the Girl With the Cross, actually died instantly. And the cross wasn’t even hers. The necklace belonged to survivor goth girl Kellie, who told the truth and was run out of town by bullies from Sarah’s church.
Lee, haunted by the truth, wants to tell the truth. She believes Sarah deserves to be remembered for whom she actually was, instead of a martyr, knowing Sarah would want the truth told. The other survivors have different reactions to telling their own truths about the shooting.
Kody Keplinger created a diverse cast of survivors with LGBT, race, disability, blindness, PTSD, substance abuse and asexuality. She didn’t capture the asexuality component of Leanne as accurately as she should have, not taking into account that attraction doesn’t necessarily happen before puberty and that a trauma like a school shooting can arrest emotional development or that anti-anxiety/depression meds often have side effects of dulling sexual desire. Lee may have been asexual, but at age seventeen with her history and the meds, the label could be limiting. Also, sexual orientation isn’t just about the act of sex. Keplinger did handle Leanne’s willingness to consider possibilities well.
The message of THAT’S NOT WHAT HAPPENED is as important as the story of the survivors. We ought to be in control of our own narratives, not how people want to tell our stories. Our lives are our own stories to write, not others’. We are all doing our best to survive and thrive in this thing called life. None of us are getting out of here alive.
I also enjoyed the audiobook. -
Trigger warnings: school shooting, death of a friend, blood, violence, gun violence, mental health, PTSD, bullying.
Wow. This book was definitely harder hitting than I expected from Kody Keplinger. It's about the six survivors of a school shooting and the various ways in which it's changed their lives. Leanne's best friend died in her arms that day and she's struggling with the way that Sarah has been turned into a martyr by her parents, her church, and the town as a whole. So she persuades the other survivors to write their stories of that day and what's come since.
There's a stack of diversity in this story - Leanne is on the ace spectrum, Denny is black and blind, Eden is a Latina lesbian, and Ashley was shot in the back that day and is now paraplegic - and I really loved the interactions between the various characters and the friendships that emerged between them after the shooting.
Reading this in the aftermath of the Christchurch shooting was difficult, and made me appreciate all the more the fact that Keplinger chose to have her characters insist on never naming the gunman. Definitely not an easy book to read, but I'm glad I read it. -
DNF @ 185
I didn't know what this was about when I picked it up, but I regret everything. bad characters, iffy plot, boring structure, and the only good thing was the accurate ace rep. otherwise it was bad. -
“But I think it’ll be okay. We’ll both be okay.
We’ve survived worse, after all.”
This book had great potential and I went into this with an idea of how I wanted it to be, perhaps I shouldn’t have done that.
I would’ve loved if the survivors guilt and the actual grief was further explored because I feel like it wasn’t focused on enough, or in a way that made me feel something.
What did make me feel something was Denny and the essay that he had written. I would’ve loved more from his perspective.
I felt like Lee pressured people into writing letters about their traumatic experience with the shooting and that didn’t sit well with me. I understand she was ready but it didn’t mean that everyone else had to be too.
The things I didn’t like aside, I enjoyed the characters and the journeys that this story brought me on with them. Denny was such a funny character and I loved him immediately.
Coach Nolan, you deserved better. -
There seem to be quite a few books about school shootings at the moment but this is probably the first one I've been tempted to read. It's such a difficult topic and I really didn't want to read a book that was going to deal with such a heavy or emotionally charged subject. This however appealed to me firstly because of the author but mostly because this book focuses on the survivors and how they're coping (or not) three years down the line.
Mass shootings and gun control are very topical at the moment and this story does cover a lot of the arguments and some scenes which will be very familiar to anyone who's watched the news recently. What I liked about it though is rather than necessarily putting across a specific argument or trying to explain the why behind the shooting or how it could have been prevented this looks at the effect of media coverage and all of this arguing on the victims and survivors. News coverage and social media put stories out there instantly and once a particular version of events is out there it often becomes the accepted story. The victims and survivors are often pushed into roles they may not necessarily want, courageous hero, martyr, spokesperson, face of a campaign or if they're really unlucky, coward or liar. The story becomes twisted to fit the agenda of the various lobbying groups and the truth and more importantly the impact on the survivors and the families of the victims is forgotten.
This book demonstrates very effectively just what it's like for those to survive this type of ordeal. The story is told from the pov of Lee who was one of six survivors of a mass shooting in her school and was with her best friend Sarah when she was killed. When Sarah's parents decide to publish a book about their daughter who has become a bit of a martyr as the girl who died for her faith, Lee decides the truth has to come out. She begins collecting the real stories of the survivors and the victims but is she doing it for the right reason and what impact could telling the truth have on her life and the life of those around her.
I thought the author did a wonderful job of portraying what kind of impact this type of ordeal would have on someone and the different ways the survivors have found to cope (or are still struggling). It may be three years later but they're still grieving, they feel guilty, suffer from flashbacks and panic attacks but with the media attention and the whole community watching them they're trapped into specific roles.
I loved how this story revealed more about each of the survivors and victims. Lee sets out to show the world that they are more than what happened to them. They were not all heroes and or saints. They were regular people, flaws and all and they were in a terrifying situation. They shouldn't have to do or be anything and they shouldn't have to carry the weight or attention of the media or whatever lobbying group. That being said, it also raises the issue of whether it's okay to put the truth out there when it could upset the families of the victims.
One other thing I have to say I loved about this story was how diverse it was. Lee the main character is on the asexual spectrum (something I don't think I've ever really come across before), there are two characters with physical disabilities, different races represented but also different religious beliefs. I'm not sure I would necessarily say that I particularly loved or connected to any one character but I was invested in their stories.
This really was a brilliantly written story and I loved how sensitive the author was in dealing with such a difficult topic. I do get the impression some serious research has gone into this but if I had one criticism it's that I wish there was some acknowledgement of this or some details at the back. I was however reading an ARC though so perhaps that will pop up in the final version.
Thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for providing me with an ARC. As always all views are my own. -
Sometimes it’s okay to believe things that aren’t true. Sometimes it’s necessary. At least, that’s what I told myself.
The main character of this book is so vehemently unlikeable it seems almost intentional. The whole plot of the story is that Leanne (Lee) and five other kids survived a school shooting three years ago. Lee (and most the others) are still dealing with survivors guilt, PTSD, anxiety, and unhealthy coping mechanisms. This part felt pretty realistic, I liked the way she incorporated the unhealthy coping mechanisms and made the characters aware that what they were doing was unhealthy and having them get help, and it's one of the only reasons I decided to keep suffering through this. I don't know whether I should tag the rest of the review as a spoiler because I'm being pretty vague but ... better to be safe than sorry.
Anyways, this book was a mess. Honestly, a giant mess. The main character is someone who'd easily be the antagonist or even just a flat-out villain in literally any other situation. I almost DNF'd it (can I use that in this context?) halfway through and if I didn't have so much time on my hands I probably would've. I just finished it and I already regret having wasting my time with it.
