| Title | : | Imagine Us Happy |
| Author | : | |
| Rating | : | |
| ISBN | : | 1335015361 |
| ISBN-10 | : | 9781335015365 |
| Format Type | : | Hardcover |
| Number of Pages | : | 384 |
| Publication | : | First published October 23, 2018 |
Stella lives with depression, and her goals for junior year are pretty much limited to surviving her classes, staying out of her parents’ constant fights and staving off unwanted feelings enough to hang out with her friends Lin and Katie.
Until Kevin. A quiet, wry senior who understands Stella and the lows she’s going through like no one else. With him, she feels less lonely, listened to—and hopeful for the first time since ever…
But to keep that feeling, Stella lets her grades go and her friendships slide. And soon she sees just how deep Kevin’s own scars go. Now little arguments are shattering. Major fights are catastrophic. And trying to hold it all together is exhausting Stella past the breaking point. With her life spinning out of control, she’s got to figure out what she truly needs, what’s worth saving—and what to let go.
Imagine Us Happy Reviews
-
It doesn’t feel like I could ever be that off the rails again, even though I’m sure that’s how I felt before everything started going to shit the first time around.
Some of you might know that I am really, really into books about 1) depression, and 2) toxic parental relationships, and 3) toxic romantic relationships. This… hit me hard in all three categories. I have not emotionally connected to a book this much in… so long, and I kind of can't decide if I hate this and love this.
So before I get into why I loved this so much, I’ll just mention objective quality and all that? Imagine Us Happy is told out of chronological level, a choice that worked quite well for the story being told; we know from the beginning that this will not end well, but we see the good parts along with the bad. It also works fantastically for conveying Stella as a character; she is so difficult not to connect with and relate to.
I will readily admit that a good portion of my enjoyment of this book was that I connected to Stella, as a character, a lot. Stella is dealing with depression and a lack of support system via her parents, which has led her to seek valiation in someone who is dealing with issues but in a very, very unhealthy way. She, meanwhile, is not in a place where she realizes what is going on with her or her partner.
Okay, bear with me, as this is really rather personal and something I haven’t talked about, but I don’t know how to review this book without talking about this.
I was recently in a relationship with someone whom I absolutely believe cared about me, and who had very, very good intentions in pursuing a relationship. The relationship was also, though I didn’t realize it at the time, not good for either of us. And I did not realize it at all because I had not come to terms with my own fear of rejection or perhaps more accurately, as I’ve recently realized, my deep-set fear that I would become a manipulative or needy partner.
So the relationship stopped being a good place for me to be, and I said nothing about it because I was desperately afraid of hurting them. I became increasingly convinced that any problems with the relationship were not compatibility issues, or their ongoing mental health issues, or anything that impacts a relationship, but my fault. There were times where they contributed to this, but I doubt it would have impacted me at all if not for my own deep-held feeling that I was destined to be a selfish and manipulative person and partner. I tried to push down my own feelings. I isolated myself from both my therapist and my friends because I was unwilling to “talk behind their back,” which began to mean no one in my life - and I do mean no one - knew what was happening in any way. My friends would have told you I seemed perfectly happy, and I got very good at pretending I was, but inside I was not at all.
So I think reading this book, in which someone goes through the same thing and they're not villainized for it, meant a lot to me. I really liked that Stella eventually got through the period of the relationship via her best friends, as the support of one of my friends, and later several more, was essentially what got me through that, too.
Oh, and I loved her friends - Katie of the dead frog kink and Lin the John Steinbeck fangirl were so fun. Really though, I love that these two characters feel so un-stereotyped; Katie especially immediately read as the hot partier friend, and I completely assumed I knew how she would be characterized. I did not. Katie does not abandon her friends for greener pastures, not even when Stella pushes her away completely. And Lin, despite being the more academic-oriented of the two, does not read like the nerd archetype — she reads as more of the offbeat-english-major type, which does not show up a lot, and she’s not the unpopular member of their friend group. I liked this a lot - especially as she’s Asian, this is a great way of defying that particular stereotype.Yeah, it reeks of weed, and the song “Don’t Stop Believin” has been played four times by 10:30 p.m., but chilling in her kitchen getting buzzed off beer while talking with Lin is not actually that far from my ideal Saturday night.
In general, I felt that this book got high school on a level that not a lot of books do? The details of Katie and Lin’s characterization certainly add to this, but it’s the little things, too. Like, there’s a line mentioning the party transitioning to “Iris” by the Goo Goo Dolls, and I laughed so hard because wow, been there.
Also, this quote so easily could have been cringey, but I laughed my ass off because t r u e:“I think it would be great if everyone understood feminism. But let’s be realistic for a minute here. How many dudes were in your class?”
“Four,” I say.
“Out of?”
“Twenty-five,” I admit.
“And how many of them were gay?” he asks.
I pause. “I plead the fifth.”
It’s funny - I sat on this review for so long, and now I think I should probably mention that while writing this part of my review - which took me a month of sitting on, by the way - I was thinking about how much better I am feeling, three months later, and how much that relationship taught me about my own insecurities and my flaws. And I also thought about the other person in that relationship and why we broke up, and I think... we’re both doing better now.
And I don’t know if I really wish that for the love interest in this book, but I do wish that for them. And I think I felt better now, about myself, writing this review, than I have in seventeen years.
It’s a work in progress. But a good one. And this book understood it on a level I don’t think I’ve ever seen.
✨Arc received from the publisher via my local bookstore for an honest review. [ releases: October 2018.]
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This story is heavy and deals with a lot of toxicity and abuse, so please know that going into it. I’ve heard a lot of friends say the synopsis made them think this book was about depression, and it is, but if you’re someone who’s triggered by abusive scenarios (especially emotional/mental abuse), please just proceed with caution and take care of yourself! ♥
Everything was always so good, is what I’m saying, until it suddenly wasn’t.
That aside, Imagine Us Happy is a fantastic portrayal of a scenario that so many people find themselves in, in relationships of all types. The unusual thing about emotional and mental abuse is that so many of us have no idea how to recognize it’s happening to us. We’re shown from a young age what physical and sexual abuse look like (though those lines can be hard for victims to recognize until they’ve already been crossed, too!), but many of us have no idea how to differentiate between an “argument” or “joke” and abuse, until we’re in the thick of it (if ever).Kevin’s got this look on his face that I can barely stand to look at. Anger makes Kevin look like an entirely different person.
That’s why I have to say that my favorite thing about Imagine Us Happy is how genuine the abuse rep here is. As someone who has been in scenarios that were almost identical to what Stella goes through, I wish so badly that I’d had this book as a teen, because maybe it could have helped me recognize what was happening to me before the damage was done. I want to put this book in the hands of every teen, just to say, “Hey, look at this! This is never what a relationship or friendship should look and feel like!”I spend all of my time lost in his words, or his eyes, or his touch, and every time I’m pulled back into reality, I want less and less to do with it.
The most realistic thing about Stella and Kevin’s relationship isn’t even just the abuse, but what comes in the gaps between the toxic moments, too. We see things that might seem justifiable to some, like Kevin’s constant obsession over whether Stella is cheating on him or not, or the way Kevin and Stella get so wrapped up in one another that Stella literally forgets important events in her best friends’ lives, because Kevin’s gravity has pulled her in so tightly and won’t let go. This is so common in toxic relationships. What’s also common is the way Kevin convinces Stella that he’s genuinely sorry, or the decency he shows her in between fights (like his strongly valuing her consent in certain scenes). Kevin is a perfect example of what many abusers look like, because he’s not a villain 24/7—he has enough good moments that he convinces Stella to put up with the terrible ones.Here is a fact:
Sometimes I just get… sad.
Another thing I loved here is the mental illness representation. On one hand, we see how Kevin’s mental illness can make it difficult for him to react properly to certain situations—but on the other hand, Stella’s own mental illness struggles give us a clear balance that avoids vilifying or romanticizing mental illness in any way.I guess that’s why I’m starting at the end. I don’t want anyone to be confused about the type of love story I’m about to tell, or where it’s going, or what to expect. And I don’t want to disappoint anyone in search of a happy ending. I’ll say it from the start: this isn’t that kind of story.
Finally, there’s the storytelling style. Imagine Us Happy is told in a nonlinear fashion, starting at the end before jumping back to the beginning, and occasionally giving us glimpses of the build-up to the ending (so, if you’re reading it and wondering why the chapter numbers don’t go in perfect order, it’s not a misprint). It is such a unique and cool formatting idea, and I felt like it really got the message across so much more clearly than a standard beginning-to-end reading style.I know that the tenderness is as temporary as the flash of anger that preceded it, but I can’t help but let myself soak in it, cling on to it like a drowning man to a rope.
I feel like there’s more I could say, but honestly, just read it. This is a fantastic book and I highly recommend it. I genuinely hope to see this book promoted heavily, especially in school libraries, because I think the sometimes brutal honesty depicted here could help so many readers.
Content warnings for abuse, depression, self-harm, suicidal ideation
All quotes come from an advance copy and may not match the final release. Thank you so much to Harlequin Teen for providing me with this ARC in exchange for an honest review!
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exploring toxic, unhealthy relationships is such a difficult task for a writer to do but im so impressed with how this book handled it
the story starts off with the main character speaking to the reader, telling them that this isn't a cute, happily-ever-after type of love story. she then takes the reader on her journey, day-by-day, for them to see themselves.
i absolutely loved the character depth. stella is witty and tired and honestly trying her best in what she //thinks// is right for her. but she screws up sometimes and i thought she had such an accurate portrayal of how messy teenage life can be
as we see the events of stella's life play out, from the day she met kevin to when their relationship turned more serious, the author did an amazing job of SHOWING the reader how some things that seem so innocent and natural can actually turn really toxic
i also loved the parallels drawn from stella and kevin's relationship and her parent's relationship.
how, when the people around us are going through something, it's so easy to identify the problem and put forward an easy, obvious solution. but when we're in that situation, we get blindsighted by ideas like "things will get better" or "it won't be so bad next time" or think that if we change our own actions, there will be a healthier outcome
and that's really the message i took out of this book.
people are complex. they aren't just good/kind and bad/evil all the time. and sometimes a really good person can be in a situation that brings out how manipulative or self-absorbed they are.
in stella's case, it showed through her isolating herself from her friends and getting so caught up in her own little romantic fantasy that she didn't see how she was ignoring her family, friends, and even, herself
and i think, these experiences come in people's lives so they can learn, identify their faults and weaknesses, and try to learn and grow from them. bc that's the best thing we can do in crappy situations, move on and try to be better
anyways, this is one long as hell stream of conscious (??) from me and what i'm basically trying to say is, this book is really good
4 stars -
Wanted to love this one but ended up liking it. In her sophomore novel, Jennifer Yu portrays a painfully raw relationship between two teens living with mental illness. When Stella first meets Kevin, their relationship sets off sparks. It's sexy, quirky, and all-consuming. But when Kevin becomes more possessive, and he and Stella spend more time arguing than they do getting along, the all-consuming nature of the relationship separates Stella from her friends and the relationship she once saw as love.
I appreciated the real, heart-wrenching portrayal of an abusive relationship here. Stella's feelings - her infatuation, confusion, and desire to defend the relationship even when it hurt her - all moved me and made my heart ache. Yu's writing style, while perhaps not yet as distinct or powerful as that of, say, Courtney Summers or Benjamin Alire Saenz, flows well and reads like a snappy conversation between good friends.
I have a few constructive criticisms of Imagine Us Happy. First, I feel that the theme of abuse could have been handled more directly or seriously. While Yu portrays the issue with overall sensitivity, having a mental illness does not justify relational abuse. One conversation toward the end of the book appeared to absolve Kevin of his threatening, possessive, abusive behaviors which made me cringe. Also, as a therapist, I found the therapy scenes unflattering and a little unrealistic. Maybe Yu intentionally wanted to show a bad therapist in action, as there are bad ones out there, but the therapist showed little concern for Stella's well-being and acted in ways detrimental to her (e.g., getting snarky/snappy, forcing the family session, etc.) Finally, I wanted more about Stella in this book. Because the relationship took up so much space, I had trouble identifying who she is as an individual.
Overall, a good book I would recommend to those intrigued by the synopsis. There are a couple of scenes that involve cutting, so content warning for that. I am curious to read what Yu will put out next, I hope she continues to write about important and challenging topics. -
update: this was… excellent, and I am so very impressed by it. (even if it didn’t make me cry.) rtc!
I’ve built up high expectations for this book over the past 3 years so this better get at least one (1) tear out of me -
I received this via Goodreads Giveaways in exchange for an honest review. All my opinions are my own.
---
Trigger warnings
Well,this was... something.
Sounds bad? Good? In-between really. and not.
Was this a good novel? Yes
Perfect? no
Did I enjoy myself? Yes.
Did I want to shake and sometimes give people a good swift kick? Definitely.
Could I see things the way they saw them? Yes.
Could I understand? From their perspectives, I could see what drew them to each other but so many times I had to put the book down and walk away from it so I could mentally prepare to dive back in.
If the author hadn't started the story the way she did, and told it in the way she did... there was a strong possibility I would just checked out on this and moved on to something else. I still almost did a couple times.
Did I like or hate the two main characters: Both.
What kept me coming back to it was... curiosity I suppose. I was both dreading what would happen next and eager to see what would happen.
There was a couple moments I would call Sweet between them, but there were a few times I was uncomfortably reminded of someone in my family who is... well, I'll just say immature and leave it there (partly because if I went on about this person, we'd be here all day). Couple parts especially
Now it wouldn't be fair to compare Stella and Kevin's issues to this person I mean and not trying to, just saying from my personal experience... yeah.
But anyways:
It was a rollercoaster and a trainwreck all rolled into one and very well done. It didn't feel like anything was used as a gimmick to me and I thought the issues were handled with care.
Small criticism but sometimes the jumping back and forth in time wasn't really clear and I had to re-read and think for a minute as to where I was at. It didn't pull me out of the story, but it was a bit jarring at times.
The final three "conversations" were my favorite part and had me happy/relieved in equal parts.
Sparse (right word?) review but I'm not sure what to say here really. Maybe if I can squeeze some more thoughts out of my brain, I'll edit them back in here somewhere :). -
There is a trope that often arises in stories about characters struggling with mental health issues—such as Silver Linings Playbook—that suggests that two people with the same mental illness are the best thing for each other because they understand what it’s like to have that mental illness and can “save” each other.
This is nice in theory. After all, who knows what it’s like to battle depression or anxiety better than someone else who’s battling the same things. But in reality, it can often be a bad idea. If you are depressed, spending time with other depressed people can feed negative thought patterns that exacerbate your depression. This is not always true, of course, but it can and does happen, especially when one or both of the depressed friends or partners isn’t receiving adequate treatment.
That’s essentially what this book is about—a toxic relationship between two teenagers with fragile mental health. Stella missed much of her sophomore year of high school because she was at a camp for teens with depression. She comes back for her junior year not feeling 100% better but determined to get through class, avoid her parents’ fights, and rebuild her relationships with her two best friends, Lin and Katie. But then she meets Kevin, a senior who makes her feel understood in a way that she’s never experienced before. He too struggles with depression and he makes Stella feel a little less alone in her struggles.
The problem is, Kevin’s depression is significantly more intense than Stella’s and she’s not the least bit prepared to handle it. As their relationship deepens, Kevin’s instability causes him to become more controlling and less understanding.
I liked that this story took a brutal, honest look at what it can be like to fall into a relationship that is not good for you while remaining completely unable to see it. It doesn’t romanticize mental illness or the notion that two depressed teenagers can save each other.
The story is told in a very nonlinear fashion. But it’s not a straightforward Before and After structure, either. Readers will need to pay attention to the chapter headers in order to keep track of what’s happening. I can see a lot of people not enjoying that, though it didn’t bother me. I didn’t even mind that the two main characters—Stella and Kevin—were hard to like or that their relationship was deeply uncomfortable. That’s kind of the point, after all.
But the story is building to a Dramatic Event, foreshadowed early on but not revealed until the very end that bothered me. We know that something happens between Stella and her friends that ruptures their relationships, and Yu gradually drips out hints as we get closer to the end of the book. I don’t want to give anything away, but the final reveal was…unsatisfying and a little cliché. It brought this book down from a four-star read to a three-star one that I’m not totally sure I could recommend unreservedly except to a very select set of readers. -
I received this book from a goodread’s giveaway and I have to say I loved this book. It touched on different issues like toxic relationships, mental health, and the importance of friendship. The story made me laugh, cry, and scream because I became so frustrated. I could relate to the main character so much it was kind of heart-rending but also made me feel... not alone?
Anyways, five stars. -
In the very beginning of this book, we are told that she doesn't "want to disappoint anyone in search of a happy ending," and she wasn't kidding. This was a toxic love story, and a subtle caveat of how quickly something seemingly beautiful can unravel.
• Pro: What stood out for me was how well Yu conveyed the depth of the characters emotions. I really felt the joy and happiness one associates with first love, and how all consuming it can be, as well as the pain and anguish Stella was experiencing as her relationship turned toxic.
• Pro: I saw teenaged me in Stella. I was in a relationship that eerily mirrored Stella and Kevin's. I wish I had seen it depicted in a book, when I was teen, and maybe I would have recognized how damaging it was for me back then.
• Pro: Considering that this book featured two protagonists struggling with mental illness, parents constantly fighting, and a toxic romance, Yu did a good job balancing that out with some lighter parts, some tender parts, and some happy parts. There were a few characters, who did an admirable job lightening the mood, and I appreciated the balance.
• Pro: When Stella described her depression, I nodded, and felt like she really understood my struggle. I am always a fan of books, which show there is no shame in seeking out help for mental health issues.
• Pro: I know this makes other people nuts, but I liked the non-linear format. The pieces were set out in a way, which allowed the story of Stella and Kevin's relationship to emerge, and I am a fan of watching the full picture slowly develop.
• Pro: I didn't realize how much I needed Yu to explicitly state it, but I am grateful that she included an open statement, that just because Kevin and Stella were bad together does NOT mean they were bad people. Kevin wasn't a villain. Stella wasn't bad. They just didn't work together.
Overall: A toxic love story, which took me on an emotional roller coaster ride, which was funny, sad, messy, and honest.
*ARC provided in exchange for an honest review.
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Stella begins an unhealthy relationship with Kevin, causing a rift with her two best friends when she ignores them for him. At home, her parents fight. Then Stella and Kevin break up and her parents announce they’re divorcing. The End
I think Jennifer Yu’s books aren’t for me. I didn’t enjoy her first book, in which Stella is one of the campers in FOUR WEEKS, FIVE PEOPLE which takes place the summer after the events in IMAGINE US HAPPY.
Yu does a good job illustrating the warning signs in the obsessive, overly-enmeshed relationship between Stella and Kevin. They bonded over neediness and depression. Stella’s therapist warns her not to base self-esteem on another person, but like most teens who believe they are in love, Stella knew better. Most of us have been there, done that.
IMAGINE US HAPPY is repetitive in incidents between the dysfunctional couple. The timeline skips, leading readers to believe some Big Event causes the breakup, perhaps abuse, perhaps a suicide or murder. Nope. They just breakup and while this is realistic, leading readers to believe there would be a climax made the ending anticlimactic. Stella didn’t even make the decision to walk away, Kevin did, so readers don’t get to see her build the inner strength she might have.
Another positive aspect was that Jeremy and Stella were always just project partners and friends, because men and women can be friends. His girlfriend Jennie was badass in that she was strong enough not to be jealous or insecure. I wish she had had a bigger part in the story.
I can’t think of any reason to recommend IMAGINE US HAPPY. -
,,People are complicated. They can be full of love one moment and full of anger the next. Beautiful and ugly at once, kind and cruel in turns. And the worst part and the best part about loving someone is learning that they're no exception.''
Wow. This book was amazing! I loved how we know from the very first page that there will be no happy ending. I loved how it showed that toxic relationships are NOT okay. Also how important friendship is. Ugh, this book was just so good and so full of emotions!! Where was this book when I was younger?? -
Wow. This wasn’t my favorite book, just because it was so painful sometimes, but it was really impactful. I definitely did not expect to stay up all night because I couldn’t stop reading. Stella’s voice totally drew me in, even when she was making bad decisions.
And, as things went along, I felt more stressed out and nervous, probably the same way Stella felt. Ugh. Kevin was a JERK, but the book did a great job at not completely vilifying him (otherwise it would be too easy.) A lot of times, I couldn’t place blame... it was more like “this is a mess and both of y’all need to get out.”
Besides the pretty serious themes, there were a lot of light movements. I’m glad. Everything felt... normal? Not normal. But it wasn’t just a sea of pain. It felt like real life.
I think this is an important book, especially since we as a society place so much emphasis on romantic relationships, and I’m sure there are lots of teens in toxic relationships. Maybe this book will help them recognize it. -
4.5 stars.
“It doesn’t feel like I could ever be that off the rails again, even though I’m sure that’s how I felt before everything started going to shit the first time around.”
Imagine Us Happy follows Stella, who is used to living with depression. Because of this, her goals for junior year are simple: survive her classes, stay out of her parents' fights, and ignore her unwanted feelings to hang out with Katie and Lin. That is, until she meets Kevin. He's a quiet senior who understands Stella and what she's going through like no one else she knows. But to keep that feeling, Stella begins to let her grades slip and her friendships fall apart. And, soon after, she begins to see how deep Kevin's scars go, and how damaging they can be. Little arguments turn into the end of the world, and major fights are even worse. With her life turning into something terrible, and something she can no longer control, Stella needs to learn what's really important—and what she needs to finally let go.
I have to admit:
Imagine Us Happy hit me harder than I ever expected it to. Abuse narratives always do, to a personal extent, but the way it was written made this book even more impactful than it would've been otherwise, in my opinion. The writing was beautiful, the characters were so well done, and the plot was handled so well for such a sensitive topic. I'm completely impressed with the way
Jennifer Yu wrote this story. We all know I'm not afraid to call out shitty treatments of mental health and sensitive topics, but I'm so glad I don't have to do that here and that I have (almost) entirely good things to say.
I'll start with the characters. Stella was so well written and is someone I think a lot of people can relate to, if they've gone through the same things she has. She has a toxic home life, no support from her parents, and is depressed, which causes her to seek comfort and validation in a boy that definitely doesn't have her best interests at heart, and who is handling his own problems in such awful, unhealthy ways. This book being out of chronological order made my heart hurt for her even more than it would have if it was the other way around, honestly. On top of that, Katie and Lin are such incredible friends, and were so fun to read about. They were just as developed and cared for as Stella, and had so much more depth than you might think they have at the beginning.“Ever since the whole mental meltdown thing happened in the middle of the school year last semester, my mother has really gotten into tea, as if some particuarly potent strain of chamomile is going to be able to soothe our family's nerves back into normalcy.”
It's interesting to me how Yu chose to portray Stella and Kevin. Neither of them are villains, despite both of them contributing to an unhealthy, abusive relationship. While Kevin was clearly shown to be worse than Stella in a lot of ways, I do think the main point that while they were very, very bad together, they could be much better apart, if they worked for it. I do think a lot of abusive narratives are relatively black and white, but this one wasn't. There was a lot of depth and problems with both Stella and Kevin, and those problems went deep enough that it made them both toxic for each other. I've experienced an abusive relationship, which was incredibly harmful for me and less for him, and that's a lot different than their story, so I did like that Yu took the time to make their story a lot deeper than what you see on the surface for both sides.
So, getting to the one negative thing I have to say, which is entirely a personal preference: while I did say I like that it was told out of order, simply because it gave the story even more of an impact, I'm not the biggest fan of that writing style. I do think it worked well for this story, and probably wouldn't for many others, but it's still not something I was really pleased about. That being said, I think it takes an incredibly talented author to make something like that work, while still developing relationships and characters and the plot, and Yu did a damn good job at it, regardless of my personal feelings.
Overall, I loved
Imagine Us Happy. It had well written, developed characters, a sensitive plot that was handled with care, and so many incredible messages I wish I had as a teenager. This is definitely one of the best books I've read on this topic in a while.“Some love stories aren't meant to last.”
ARC provided by Edelweiss in exchange for an honest review. -
Jennifer Yu masterfully weaves difficult subjects into a plot that keeps the reader engaged and feeling as though they are a part of the story. In reality, most of us are. Depression and/or unhealthy relationships touch almost all of us in some way. I was glad to see an unhealthy relationship presented as exactly that, which is a rarity in the YA genre.
This unbiased review is based upon a complimentary copy provided by the publisher. -
*I received this book as part of a Goodreads Giveaway*
Imagine writing a journal, putting it away for a year, then coming back, ripping out all the pages and making a story with the painful ending as the beginning. There's something unique about the characters in this book. Well, this book is pretty unique in itself. You'd think Stella is a pretty unreliable narrator because she has depression, and while she is with regards to her own facets of life (I mean, she basically blacks out in Kevin-induced lust for a month), the way she paints her friends is so genuine.
What I like most about this book is that things crumble and crumble until they explode, but the resolution to the relationship's dissolution doesn't feel forced. I can feel Stella grow from breaking down and reforming her schema of the popular jocks and cheerleaders, her behavior towards her friends, and even her behavior with Kevin. The interlocking between in-scene Stella versus aside/narrator Stella is a tricky thing that Jennifer managed to execute really well.
Mental illness is messy, and when you're in recovery it can be even messier because you're under this assumption that you got help and now you're better! But relapses happen, and especially in the teenage years, you can get caught up in a slew of strong emotions that derails your overall recovery.
I'm always looking for quality mental health contemporary regardless of a romance, and I'm really really happy this book exists, even as it is a true retelling of a story someone has already mulled over in their head for a while. -
There are some books that come to you at the exact right point in your life and no matter the small flaws and the time jumps, you just have to rate it five stars because you're pretty sure it taught you something that will stick with you for the entirety of your life.
So yeah, I loved this book, and I also needed this book, and I am incredibly grateful I chose to pick this book up at this moment in my life. Under fear of oversharing, I think I'll leave it at how I am currently reexamining a friendship of mine, one that has put me through more pain than joy the last few months, one that has too many similarities to Stella and Kevin for me to be comfortable.
Imagine Us Happy is about a toxic relationship, but even more than that, it’s about the right and wrong reasons to be in a relationship. Stella loves Kevin because he makes her okay...most of the time. And as someone who has placed my being okay in the hands of someone I thought I loved (although unrequited), I can attest to how unhealthy this truly is. While I don’t believe you must love yourself to be in a relationship, your relationship should not be dependent on them making you feel okay. Love does not cure. Love is just another complexity on top of it all, a complexity that must be handled with care and not tossed into the hands of someone who may not be trustworthy. Neither should you question their love to the point of insanity. If you have to question it, it is not love. (And there was one scene in particular where Kevin holds back his "I love you too" clearly in an emotionally manipulative way.) So, in reading this, I’ve learned a lot about myself, about how toxic it is to put your entire well-being into the hands of another, about how you should be the one to make yourself happy.
Among the small quibbles I had, was the time jumps. However, I do think they were important. In a book about emotional manipulation, it would be pretty awful of the author herself to emotionally manipulate you, the reader, into thinking that it would have a happy ending. From the first page, you know it doesn't. While I did find the jumps in time to be awkward in some instances and to be slightly confusing, I won't argue that they aren't necessary because they are. It also ended up playing like one of those movies where the main is reflecting on everything from a therapist's office or something, and I kind of loved the way that worked out? It read like a diary of Stella's realizations and at the ending she wasn't too much more developed, but through the way the story was told with italicized "yeah I know I did wrong here" we could see how much she did develop. And man, if character development is not my Achille's Heel.
Kevin is a very toxic person for Stella, he doesn't know how to communicate his feelings, he is distrusting, even of the girl he loves, and he's emotionally manipulative. But he's not painted as perfectly evil, although we are blinded by Stella's love for him for most of the novel.
As for Stella, there is not one moment in this novel that she is vilified for being in a toxic relationship, for staying in one, for trying to make one work despite her parents' failing relationship as a real-life example for her. There is one moment, though, where she believes she is complicit in the problem, where she says that she would have done the same thing as Kevin, and initially, I read this wrong, that this meant she too was as toxic as Kevin. However, this is a drunken Stella speaking the night after a huge fight with Kevin. Stella feels complicit because she is justifying Kevin's actions. If she thinks she would have done them, then they aren't so bad in her head.
One thing, though, that I thought was very...untouched was how Katie leaves Stella at a party while drunk because she was too afraid of her parent's reaction to her being out late at a party. That whole thing is wrong. You don't take your friend to a party and then leave her drunk, practically passed out, with a bunch of boys. That's party etiquette! Especially in this day and age! And it's literally never approached in the text! Stella isn't mad at Katie for leaving her; she doesn't even blame her! And while nearly everything else in this book calls out bad things people do to each other, especially in relationships, it doesn't look at how flawed Katie was to do that to Stella. It just looks at the result of having Kevin pick Stella up instead.
Speaking of that, no one should ever be afraid of their significant either nor should they feel as though they have to get permission from them to do anything. These are two things the novel touches upon, yet never specifically. I actually liked that Stella didn't have this huge realization of "oh wow, Kevin was a possessive jerk" but more the narrative allowed us to notice this. This book gets showing not telling right; there was one point where I set my book down and was just like "THAT WAS SO GOOD" about something I realized that wasn't straight-up spoken. I like that in a book.
Also East of Eden references? Quality. Lin really just reminded me of one of my friends.
This book isn't something I'll fangirl over, like I did with Radio Silence all of last year. It isn't happy, it isn't pretty, but it's important. I won't ever reread it, probably, because there's something so painful about the idea of reliving it all. But wow, was that an incredible novel, and something I just needed.
-Book Hugger
TW: self-harm (not by main character), toxic relationship, emotional abuse/manipulation, fighting -
I liked that this book talked about the tough subjects in teenage life right now, such as mental health, self harm, and relationships, but it was a struggle for me to get through this book. It felt very slow at times. I also didn’t like how it jumped around past, present and future. If you weren’t paying attention to the chapter titles you wouldn’t really realize it!
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This was an impulse grab at ALA, and like many of my impulse grabs, it ended up being one of the best books I've read.
There are a lot of books about teen relationships that break up because one person is abusive or maybe just a jerk. Stella isn't awful and neither is Kevin. They're just two people who are good together until they aren't anymore.
The narrative is told out of chronological order. It begins toward the end and goes back to the beginning but random chapters are outside of a linear timeline. It keeps us from fully investing in their relationship but it doesn't keep us from liking Kevin and Stella.
This is the kind of story that makes me sad, because there's no real reason for them not to work. It's just that it's not the right relationship (or maybe the timing's bad). But there's no villain in the story.
Imagine Us Happy is an unexpected favorite. I'm going to read everything Jennifer Yu writes, and I also just realized that her first book ($7.50 on Kindle!) is also about Stella (she's one of five people at the camp mentioned in this novel). So I'm excited for more time with her. -
I can't say I loved this book. I didn't. But I had a visceral reaction to it.
I also don't know if i'll end up reviewing it. -
*I read and reviewed an ARC of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.*
This book took me a fair amount of time to get into because I'm one who is always looking for a Happily Ever After and this book tells us from page one, that the romance isn't going to be happy. It has been so long since I've read a book with the romance not working out that it took me a long time to remember that love doesn't determine if something is good or bad. Much like when the therapist in this book mentions how our happiness shouldn't rely upon someone else and mutual love. I had to step back and remember that sometimes personal growth and understanding can be better than being in love in a unhealthy relationship. Once I did, this book was much more enjoyable.
Not that it was easy to read-- there are some heavy topics brought up, such as depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, self-harm, and of course the feelings when in an unhealthy relationship. Really though, I think it is all handled beautifully. I was very happy that characters were supportive of Stella and not her relationship and kept trying to help her and of course how everything happened. It all feels so real. Truly, this book feels like it could be a diary of someone's life and I think that is why the book hits that much harder.
An interesting thing I didn't know until I started is that this book isn't always told in chronological order. The chapters are mixed around. At first it took me a bit to get into, but then I really saw why and enjoyed it. It kept some things in suspense and helped spread out all the rough patches. It felt like someone going through their memory of Junior year and the way it is written helps the reader fully understand how a person can stay in love and a relationship when it seems so negative.
I think the only thing that really kept me from totally loving this book is that I disliked Kevin. I never thought he was a great guy and felt more like a "nice guy" to me. He is so pretentious and he felt more like a college student than a high school one. I also wasn't sure why Stella and Kevin like each other so much... perhaps we didn't get to see those scenes?
So, do I recommend this one? Yes. This isn't light and fluffy, but if you're looking for something real and emotional but still have some happiness at the end, you should check it out. I'll be reading more by Jennifer Yu in the future. -
Let's start by saying that Imagine Us Happy does not make for a fun read, which is what made it kind of hard to rate.
We follow the implosion of an incredibly volatile, emotionally abusive relationship between two teens who couldn't be more toxic for each other.
We do see the happier times as well, but when things get bad, they're really bad and so you wanna be in the right headspace when reading this book. I personally kept being reminded of how miserable I was reading Wuthering Heights, if that gives you an indication of the "enjoyment factor."
I ended up going for the higher 4-star rating because this book did a great job of showing how a relationship can be abusive even when the abuse isn't physical, which imo makes it a really important story.
Trigger warnings:
• depression
• suicidal ideation
• self-harm
• verbally/emotionally abusive relationship -
Thank you to NetGalley, Harlequin Teen and Jennifer You for an ARC ebook copy to review. As always, an honest review from me.
My rating is actually 4.5/5 stars, but since there aren't half stars I always round up.
Imagine Us Happy tells the story of two teens who are navigating life, high school, relationships and family life while dealing with depression. Stella and Kevin meet at the beginning of the school year. They end up dating for the whole year. We know its not going to end well, and the book is the story of their lives the past year.
I like that the author portrays depression and therapy in a realistic manner. That it’s a process, not a magical cure that will fix everything in a few sessions. Stella is doing better because of therapy but she has to keep working on herself. It’s not easy. The book portrays the challenges of dating or any extra stress when you’re dealing with mental health issues. No that it can’t be done, but both people have to be taking care of themselves in healthy ways.
A super realistic look at depression, dating and friendships. I think this is going to be a very popular young adult book for years to come! -
• Find my reviews here:
Literary Meanderings
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Imagine Us Happy is the story of a toxic/mentally abusive relationship between two teens with depression. Stella and Kevin are both living with depression and both dealing with it in different ways. Stella isolates herself as much as possible, while Kevin . When the two come together, sparks fly. The two begin a relationship and in no time at all, things begin to go south. Kevin becomes extremely possessive and mentally/emotionally abusive. He doesn't hurt Stella physically, but abuse comes in multiple forms. Pretty soon, Stella is pulling away from the only two friends she has and is using Kevin as a crutch for her depression. Kevin does the same, but uses manipulation tactics to keep Stella "in line". All they do is fight with escalating intensity, leaving Stella feeling as if she is doomed to be just like her constantly-fighting parents.
Dislikes:
• The story jumps from future, past, future, past, present, etc. It is ALL OVER THE PLACE. I don't mind a time jump, but this was a little tough to follow unless you really paid attention, which would be fine...except the story wasn't all that gripping, you know? So, I was constantly losing track of whether I was in the past or the future.
• There just wasn't enough emphasis on the mental illness aspect of the story. We know the two teens are depressed and how they each cope, but we also know that neither way is healthy. Stella sees a therapist for awhile, but she stops when things get serious with Kevin. She uses her boyfriend and relationship with him as therapy. Granted, her therapist did warn her against this, but she didn't listen. She's a teen, I get it. Still, in the end, I didn't see any growth from her as a character. She was the same girl by the end of the book and that was disappointing. It was less about either of their mental illnesses than about the toxicity of the relationship itself. I think the author really missed the mark.
• The book was just slow, to be honest. I had that niggling urge to skim.
Likes:
• The format. While I wasn't a fan of the past a future layout, I did like that the book starts with the ending. It served to keep the reader on their toes and waiting for the fall. It worked.
• It did cover some tough topics, such as mental illness, self-harm, and abusive relationships. I can always appreciate this.
• I enjoyed some of the side characters! Lin, one of Stella's friends, was amazing. Loved her. I also enjoyed Jeremy and his girlfriend. Jeremy is a boy Stella is working with on a school project—and also a huge source of jealousy for Kevin—and Jennie is his girlfriend. They are the perfect juxtaposition to the relationship between Stella and Kevin. I think the contrast was needed and a nice move on the author's part.
Overall, I think the book could've been better organized. It was barely likable, but I gave it the ol' college try. I think the intentions were great, but the execution didn't hit the mark. If you can look past the misplaced focus on the romance-gone-wrong, perhaps you may like this one. For me it fell a bit short.
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Book source: From the publisher for review
Publisher: Harlequin Teen
• For more of my reviews, check out my blog!
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"You want to love someone because they complement you and make you a better person, not because you need them or because they’re distracting you from other issues in your life or because they fulfill a need that’s going otherwise unfulfilled."
That's probably my favorite quote among the many highlighted ones in my Kindle.
If the title wasn't enough to clue you in, I'm gonna go ahead and emphasize that this book screams of tragedy. It's the kind that comes from your first crash-and-burn with love; an unexpected heartache that paralyzes you when you realize that the relationship isn't forever. That he/she turns out NOT to be the one - not nearly as dreamy or perfect or even healthy for you, in the way that you've imagined him/her to be.
We've all went through that kind of heartbreak, which makes this story VERY relatable.
However, I was expecting more disaster as the climax rose - since Kevin and Stella were repeatedly emphasized as f*cked up. I expected someone to break down and shoot the other person, because both of them were characterized as volatile. That didn't happen though... hence, I'm a bit disappointed. -
This book honestly blew me away. Even though a lot of the experiences of the main character are totally different from anything I’ve ever been through, I connected to her emotionally really strongly.
The writing style, on a sentence level, didn’t quite wow me enough for me to give this book 5 stars, but I def still considered it. The structure is really impressive (I usually hate time jumps, but they worked super well here), and the emotional core is just, phew, really strong. I feel like this is a book that a lot of teens (and adults, honestly) need. It may be tough if you’ve ever been in a similar boat with a toxic relationship, but the fact that the main character isn’t vilified for her choices, and her friends are so empathetic, was really great.
TW for a toxic/possibly abusive relationship, and a couple of mentions of self-harm. -
This is one of the most intense reads I have had in quite some time. One of the lead characters is super intense on his own, but the whole experience of this title was just edgy and intense from moment one! I really enjoyed the experience of the protagonist...who is NOT strong or particularly resilient to begin with but finds a way to be just that as time goes on. It's heartbreaking but very real and I think my students will devour it! ☺
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I loved this book so much because it is so different from everything that I see in YA. It focuses on an abusive relationship which I have never read about before in YA. Of course, there are unhealthy relationships, but nothing like this.
It reminds me so much of Why We Broke Up by Daniel Handler. Why we broke up is a story, basically told from the perspective of a girl who is writing her break up letter to her boyfriend. It recounts their entire romance, up until the point where they break up. Similarly, Imagine Us Happy begins, telling us that it is a break up story, not a love story. It is very clear that it doesn’t have a happy ending. It is a really enjoyable to read the good parts of their relationship
This book is about abusive relationships and it is portrayed so well. I don’t know a lot about abusive relationships because it isn’t something that I personally have experienced or anybody that I know, but I thought that it was so accurate based off of what I do know.
Stella thinks that her and Kevin will be compatible because they are both dealing with their own mental health issues (they are both depressed, but I think Kevin is more than Stella). She doesn’t really know much about about Kevin, but she is attracted to him and she just decides that they can be good because they are both depressed.
The way that Stella will forgive Kevin, even after he’s ignored her for three weeks. It’s possible and real to love somebody that abuses you. You can love someone that doesn’t treat you right. She loved Kevin even though his depression turned into anger and he took it all out on Stella. She just ignored all the bad signs because she felt good when she was with him.
How in the back of her mind she acknowledges that her relationship isn’t healthy but it is the only thing that makes her happy and she can’t give it up. Stella stops going to see her therapist. The therapist points out at one point that Stella should still be coming to therapy because she still needs to deal with her feelings in a healthy way, even though she is happy. Stella ignores her, because to her, she is happy because she thinks that being with Kevin deals with her stress in a healthy way.
She can’t stand up for herself. She knows that there are problems in her relationship, but she won’t let herself believe that she can get somebody better than Kevin. I don’t actually know if Stella loves Kevin. She just loves the feeling that she gets when she is with him. In one part where she is reflecting on their relationship, she says that she doesn’t regret anything because Kevin made her feel safe and loved and she still likes that feeling. He still made her feel good and that was the good thing about them.
Stella is so obsessed with the way that Kevin makes her feel. When she is around Kevin, she is happy. She can forget about all the rest of her problems, and she is addicted to Kevin.
Kevin often makes Stella feel guilty for their arguments. They get in big fights, and Kevin always blames things on her, when 99% of the time it is because he overreacted or something. He makes her feel like their arguments are her fault, and she believes him and changes things because she wants Kevin to be happy. Kevin thinks that she doesn’t spend enough time with him, so she starts doing less and less homework at night. She stops hanging out with her friends and does school work during lunch so that she can be with Kevin as much as possible after school.
Stella cares so much about Kevin that she doesn’t care about herself. She loses who she is. She’s barely making it through school, and she doesn’t do anything that she wants. Everything that she does is for Kevin because she can’t say no to him. She fears that if she says no to him it will cause his depression to get worse.
During the book, Stella stops going to her therapy sessions because she believes that since Kevin makes her so happy, she doesn’t need her therapist anymore. But the thing is, the problem is that Kevin is the only thing that makes her happy. Whenever anything goes wrong, all Stella wants is Kevin. She wants to be with him and kiss him. There’s a scene were Stella gets extremely upset and she is in Kevin’s house and she says to him “just touch me Kevin,” because that makes her feel better.
This book was hard to read. Mainly because I know that these kind of relationships exist in real life. It’s hard because Stella lets herself go through so much pain and suffering and it’s real. There are people who are in these kinds of relationships and my heart broke so many times while reading this book, just realizing that real people have these experiences.
Stella’s relationship with Kevin is a lot like her parents. Her parents argue so much, probably should get marriage counselling or something. They shout at each other and often Stella can’t sleep at night because her parents are so loud downstairs. She gets angry with her parents because they argue so much, but she doesn’t see it in her own relationship with Kevin. She doesn’t reflect it on herself and see that her and Kevin do the exact same thing. Stella’s parents are slightly different because they don’t make up in the end (it’s more of a constant state of arguing)
The only critiques that I have
The book is told in chapters of the happy times of Kevin and Stella’s relationship and the arguing times. There are also a few chapters of her reflecting on the entire thing after it’s over. Sometimes, the chapters were confusing, like the transitions between chapters and the time jumps weren’t very clear. This could be because I read it on ebook, but (ex chapter 32 would be called 55 and it would be a scene of them arguing). I really don’t pay attention to chapter titles/numbers when I read, so I often realized that it was a ‘bad’ chapter kind of late in the game -
4 Stars, RTC 6/3/18
