| Title | : | Harmony |
| Author | : | |
| Rating | : | |
| ISBN | : | 0399562605 |
| ISBN-10 | : | 9780399562600 |
| Language | : | English |
| Format Type | : | Hardcover |
| Number of Pages | : | 288 |
| Publication | : | First published August 2, 2016 |
How far will a mother go to save her family? The Hammond family is living in DC, where everything seems to be going just fine, until it becomes clear that the oldest daughter, Tilly, is developing abnormally--a mix of off-the-charts genius and social incompetence. Once Tilly--whose condition is deemed undiagnosable--is kicked out of the last school in the area, her mother Alexandra is out of ideas. The family turns to Camp Harmony and the wisdom of child behavior guru Scott Bean for a solution. But what they discover in the woods of New Hampshire will push them to the very limit. Told from the alternating perspectives of both Alexandra and her younger daughter Iris (the book's Nick Carraway), this is a unputdownable story about the strength of love, the bonds of family, and how you survive the unthinkable.
Harmony Reviews
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"Today you may be the mom whose child seems to old to be having a tantrum in the post office (or the one whose child is touching her head to the floor of a Chinese restaurant—right there, she's doing it again), but tomorrow you may be the mom whose child holds forth on the difference between 'time' and 'thyme' in the produce aisle of the grocery store."
Life for Alexandra Hammond and her husband Josh seemed to be going well, living in Washington, DC, raising two young daughters—not bad for a couple who met while in their late teens. But when they start to realize their older daughter Tilly is having issues with her intellectual and emotional development. She's immensely smart and focused, but has trouble with anger management, social interaction, inappropriate language, and risk taking.
The Hammonds try everything they can to help Tilly's development, but even with one-on-one classes and counseling, the issues she has seem to get worse and worse. Their younger daughter Iris vacillates between pride when her sister's intelligence shows through and embarrassment when her behavior in public calls attention to her entire family. And when Tilly is asked to leave yet another school, Alexandra and Josh are at their wits' end, and it's putting a strain on their marriage.
In the midst of the chaos, Alexandra meets Scott Bean, a charismatic child behavior counselor who helps parents realize they're not to blame for their children's issues—the world they live in, the foods they eat, societal pressures, all of that are to blame. His advice helps Alexandra and her family cope with the rough spots in which they find themselves, and as she realizes that perhaps she isn't fully equipped to handle Tilly on her own, Scott presents the Hammonds with a unique opportunity: join him in rural New Hampshire where he is building a "family camp" for families like theirs. The Hammonds can be one of the camp's "core families" and serve as a role model for others.
The Hammonds sell everything they own and move to New Hampshire, where they're forced to do without television, internet, cell phones, junk food, etc., and instead focus on healthy interaction, outdoor activities, and everyone taking personal responsibility for certain tasks. They meet the two other "core families" and at first they feel as if they're flourishing in this new environment, yet the same problems arise, as do resentments about the sacrifices they must make to stay at camp, and Scott's quasi-cult leader-like behavior. But will this provide the breakthrough the Hammonds need to help Tilly? Will they be able to serve as role models for other families struggling with the same issues?
I really enjoyed Harmony for the most part, even if it was somewhat predictable. The book raised some interesting questions for me, particularly how a family deals with one child who requires more love and attention than others, and how the child deals with their sibling. It's also a look at whether bringing families with similar issues together, getting them to focus on structure without outside stimuli, can be an effective method.
The book switches back and forth between narration by Alexandra and Iris, who bring different perspectives to the story and what life is like raising and living with Tilly. But the most fascinating and poignant chapters are those narrated by Tilly, as they provide some creative foreshadowing and show just how astute and sensitive she is. It's not a perfect story by any means, and at times you want to shake the characters for not raising the issues that concern them, but at the same time you can understand why they are so wary to bring strife into what seems like a fragile bubble of salvation.
I have loved Carolyn Parkhurst's work since reading The Dogs of Babel a number of years ago. (Still can't get that one out of my head.) She has a deft touch with personal and familial interaction, and imbues her stories with subtle and overt notes of poignancy. This book is moving, intriguing, slightly frustrating, but very fulfilling, and I'm always glad to get to experience her talent.
See all of my reviews at
http://itseithersadnessoreuphoria.blo.... -
3.5 All parents can relate, times when your child or children are so frustrating you feel at the end of your rope, or wish you had one handy. For many this is a temporary state but for others, those with more challenging children the frustration in ongoing, often causing unbearable stress on the parents, their other children and on the marriage itself. This is where Alexandra finds herself, her daughter Tilly, diagnosed with an unspecified disorder on the autism spectrum. Brilliant mind but unable to censor what comes out of her mouth, her actions, her tantrums, and lastly her safety, all cause concern. So when Alexandra, now desperate hears the words of Scott Bain, she grabs on to them like a life saver.
Is Scott Bain who he says he is, an educator, a man who has the answers. Is the camp they start, Harmony, a camp for challenging children, a camp or a cult? Narrated alternately by Alexandra, and her younger daughter, Iris, we lear not only what went before but how they view the camp. One can feel the desperation of Alexandra, the confusion of Iris. This is a well written and engrossing read. A look into the challenge a parent of children who are different face daily. On of which I have not first hand knowledge.The last chapter was just beautiful, representing the wishes of mothers everywhere.
ARC from Netgalley. -
This book gave me the creeps from jump. The entire concept of uprooting your family, throwing away everything your children have known (literally) and making some radical Luddite lifestyle change in a cultish camp deep in the White Mountains of New Hampshire, based on the philosophy of a completely childless child behavior "expert" struck me as completely ludicrous. Really? Just... dump your life, give away all your stuff, and move to a pest-ridden cabin in the woods? No. It read like a horror novel to me, and whatever message I was supposed to get about family resilience or living with a behaviorally-challenged child was completely buried under that untenable premise for me.
I honestly don't think I ever got past the disgusting conditions these parents forced their children into, led by this utter creep of an "expert" (he reminded me of a particularly foul Dr. Phil, all ego and condescension couched in pseudo-psychological garbage). Neither Mr. nor Mrs. Hammond are particularly sympathetic. Dad should have stood up more for his kids and building a normal life as possible in the real world. Mom was clearly so self-obsessed and concerned with what others thought, I didn't buy for a moment that she cared much about her children at all except for how their behavior reflected on her.
The story was compelling, watching the tension crank progressively upward, and the behavior guru's sanity spiral downward driving me to keep turning the pages, even though I felt queasy through much of the events. The characters of Tilly and Iris were terrific. Nice portraits in human opposites. I don't know much more than the basics about the Autism spectrum, but I found Tilly's internal life impossible not to get involved in.
When it comes to cults, however, I don't understand the entertainment value in a situation like this. A thriller? Murder mystery? Horror story? Sure, but this entire premise just freaked me out to the point that I had a problem staying with the parts of the story I did find interesting. While it's true that I don't understand the heartbreak of having a "difficult" child, I can't imagine any circumstances under which I would join this kind of group! Maybe because I grew up in an era when cults meant hundreds of people drinking poisoned Kool Aid, putting on a uniform before killing themselves in anticipation of the arrival of the mothership, or collecting an arsenal of guns and challenging the federal government to a deadly confrontation.
Like a lot of other topics, unless it's written with sensitivity and true understanding of the ramifications, I just don't like to read about it. The climax was almost painful, and the epilogue just...didn't work for me. I am not sure quite how to rate HARMONY. It was written in a unique way, some of the characters were interesting and others worth loathing, and part of the plot was fascinating, while the other was just disturbing. I can't say I wouldn't recommend it, but overall it just wasn't to my taste. -
Alexandra and Josh Hammond have two daughters – Tilly, who is thirteen, and Iris, eleven. Their eldest daughter, Tilly, is on the autistic spectrum and Alexandra is finding it increasingly difficult to cope with her behaviour. Although she loves her dearly, her challenging behaviour has seen her forced to leave school after school, until her mother she feels she has nowhere to go. Compounding her guilt is the fact that she feels she is failing her daughter, or, worse, might be making matters worse.
When she meets charismatic counsellor, Scott Bean, he seems like the answer to Alexandra’s prayers. Gradually, Scott becomes indispensible to the family and so, when he suggests they join in creating ‘Camp Harmony,’ a Camp for families for children with difficult children, the Hammond’s decide to give it a try. Giving up their life in Washington, they head for New Hampshire and a new start. There are also two other families who have decided to opt for a new, cleaner life in the wilderness.
Camp Harmony plans to welcome families with difficult children, to help them cope with their challenges. However, the Hammond’s and the other families, will not be visitors, but intend to live there. It sounds like an adventure, but gradually everyone involved gets the disquieting feeling that things are not quite as they should be. Told from the point of view of mother, Alexandra, and sister Iris, this is a fascinating account of unfolding events. Through Alexandra’s eyes, we see what led them to this point, as she gradually realises that she is not coping. Meanwhile, Iris tells the unfolding story of what happens at the camp.
I found this a gripping read. It has an interesting setting, good characters and would be perfect for reading groups, with lots to discuss. I have never read anything by Carolyn Parkhurst before, but I will certainly explore her earlier novels as I enjoyed this very much. -
This is a very interesting story with well written perspectives and characters. I read an advanced reader's copy so it will probably be more smooth when it comes out, but very good premise.
The book is told from different perspectives; Alexandra, a mother of two daughters. One has a diagnosis of PDD-NOS. the other is neurotypical. The main perspective is by 11 year old Iris, the NT child. Then there is Tilly, the different one. The family (including a father) sell everything to start a camp called Harmony targeting children who are different or on the autism spectrum.
I think the author does an exceptional job describing a parent's thought process and the simultaneous reactions to both protect and to punish a quirky child. To be honest, what parent hasn't watched their particularly quirky, anxious kid and questioned if he or she might be PDD? When you've seen one autistic child, you've seen one autistic child. Not otherwise specified.
As a guidance counselor in a middle school at the end of the year, I am preparing my spreadsheets for the high school counselors as I pass my students on. I stopped using boxes and check marks long ago. They are meaningless. How do I convey to the high school counseling office with simple check marks that J. has only been speaking for a year and he mostly echoes what you say but he needs the modeling to help him ask questions? Or that M. does very well in school, identifies himself as high functioning and needs his lunchtime to come to your room to decompress with a computer game. He calls it his sanctuary and does not wish to interact. That he is a deeply feeling being but unable to express it? How do you communicate that when the students call out a greeting to him, it is not collegial but mocking? Yet when he sits at the piano he communicates and expresses perfectly through his fingers? Or that when C. does not answer immediately, he is processing. His thinking skills are sharp but his processing is very slow.
These are unique students on the autism spectrum. The only thing they have in common is their extreme difficulty in interacting with others and they have all used their clothing as tissues and are unable to understand that others are repulsed by it. But they are each precious and unique.
The very best part of the book is the end where Parkhurst likens PDD as having a child with wings. If I could summarize it, I would but it beautifully illustrates how parenting a child with autism means that we have to change the rules to fit their special abilities to fly or have wings. If you read nothing else of the story, read the end. -
I found this book fascinating. Perhaps as the mother of a son who has learning disabilities, I particularly related to this story of a family in crisis over a daughter who is on the spectrum. They are desperate and feel isolated. When Scott Bean, an "educational consultant" offers support, understanding, and a way to cope, they willingly follow him to help run a camp for families in a similar position. The question, of course, is, Are they joining a cult?
The story is written from several perspectives, primarily their younger, "neurotypical." daughter, 11-year-old Iris who gives us the current state of the family. The mother, Alexandra, gives us the back story of their struggle with Tilly, the not-so-typical older daughter. Brilliant, eccentric, and impossible Tilly also provides several accounts from an unspecified future recounting the story of the Hammond family, trapped in the early 21st century, when doctors did not understand autism and families made meaningless gestures and many missteps in their efforts to help their children and themselves.
I won't give away the ending. I did feel it was not as satisfying as I had hoped but the rest of the book was beautifully written with engaging characters that I found believable and sympathetic. Even Alexandra with her self-hatred, riddled with feelings of failure as a mother was ultimately someone I could empathize and identify with. I read the book in two sittings, unable to put it down. It is very suspenseful, with moments of humor and others of true dread.
I want to thank NetGalley, Penguin Group Viking, and Carolyn Parkhurst for the opportunity to read this absorbing work in exchange for an honest review. -
When I was in college, I had this friend, James, and he and I would have those super-sized, far-flung conversations of the type you had when you were in college. We talked at least once about the Jonestown Tragedy because we were both fascinated by cults. That story had terrified him as a child because he had thought that his parents could, under the right circumstances, up and join a similar group. And then before he knew what hit him, he'd be standing in a serving line for suspect flavor water.
You could say we both bonded because we were over-anxious kids, but from other things he said I gathered he was like that because he felt on some level he could not trust his parents to make good choices. And this still fills me with a rage that courses up my spine like magma.
This backstory is all to explain how I came at Carolyn Parkhurst's excellent, Rorschach blot of a novel. The genius of it is there are many angles to approach this story from, many prisms of experience from which to view it.
The Hammonds have two girls, Tilly, age 13, and Iris, age 11. Both are bright and articulate, but Tilly is also on the autism spectrum and given to licking random things in public, sexually explicit outbursts, and extreme tantrums when something upsets her equilibrium. She's been asked to leave a series of schools, the latest being one that is designed to accommodate children like her. At her wits' ends, their mother, Alexandra, seeks the help of a "parenting expert”, Scott Bean, which sets a series of events in motion. The story is narrated by Alexandra in the past, Iris in the present at Camp Harmony, and Tilly in brief interludes from an unspecified future.
There are a few red flags from the start. Scott Bean is childless and unmarried. That makes him a slightly unorthodox parenting expert, but it's still possible to have insights on the subject without having kids yourself. But then Scott wants the entire family (along with two others) to permanently relocate to a run-down campground in the woods of New Hampshire to open a center for Autistic children. This plan already sounds bad. What were they going to do when the New England winter came and they were living in these flimsy cabins built for summertime occupance? Will their trust falls keep them warm?
If the red flags aren't flying yet, how about when Scott commandeers their car keys so he has them in case of an emergency? How about when Scott forbids anyone but himself from leaving camp "for a while" so they can all get acclimated? How about now?
There is being angry at a book (like
Little Fires Everywhere, don't read it) and being angry because of a book. This book infuriated me, but I loved it because, among other reasons, it seemed all too plausible. People give up their power all day every day to all manner of predators, scam artists, and misbegotten visionaries. I found all of the adults in this story infuriating and at times appalling, but I didn't find their actions surprising. And
But that is my take. Parkhurst is exceptionally even-handed, doling out the story through the brightly chiseled perspectives of Alexandra, Iris, and Tilly, who gets her thoughts across in her uniquely witty way (Interestingly, the father, who seems to be the more circumspect parent, is not one of the narrators.) You understand exactly why Alexandra and the other families felt at the end of their rope and only the most hard-hearted couldn't empathize with them. What I couldn't forgive is what they did about it.
The blurb on the cover by Jodi Picoult made me question whether this would be my type of book, but I definitely want to read more Carolyn Parkhurst. -
I felt that this book could have been better. There was a lot of good information here about spectrum disorders, but there was something missing. I don't think the plot ever really took off, it was just blah. I kept trying to figure out what angle this book was playing at, and I never really could. I didn't know if the main focus was about autism or if the main focus was about this "camp harmony" idea. Overall, I just didn't really like it.
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This is a book with a powerful message--per a Litsy user, "kids with autism are people, not problems"--but the plotting didn't really satisfy me. Full review to come.
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Alexandra and Josh Hammond love their daughters Tilly and Iris fiercely and completely. But Tilly has been diagnosed on the autism spectrum and presents quite a challenge. She can be brilliant, creative and clever, but also frustrating, uncontrollable and exhausting. Alexandra will do anything to find the help and support she so desperately seeks in order to be a good parent to Tilly and Iris. So when by a random chance she connects with Scott Bean, who proclaims to have all the answers, she feels she has found the guidance she has been searching for. Selling their home in Washington DC, Alexandra and the family choose to join Scott and a couple of other families at Camp Harmony in New Hampshire. Scott and the few "core" families will host weekly campers, families with special needs children, offering parenting guidance and hope. But is Scott the authority he claims to be? How will the Hammond family adjust to the rigid rules of the camp? Does desperation make one blind to realities?
Told through the voices of Alexandra and Iris, with an occasional tidbit from Tilly, you get the present story from Iris and the background that lead them to the camp. The tension builds to a dramatic ending that made it hard to put the book down.
An interesting insight into autism and the affect it has on the families of children on the autism spectrum. Also how easily people can be drawn into the charms of someone who seems to hold all the answers.
A favorite quote from Alexandra: "You might call it joy and relief; you might call it fellowship and communion. Faith, with its edge of magic, its unspeakable certainty, has always eluded you. The beauty of prayer: sending messages out into the universe and believing they'll be heard. How must it be to have that kind of singular, compelling purpose? A life labeled with both a direction and a goal? You've never realized that it may be something you can actually choose." -
I had high hopes for this novel after reading very positive reviews, but in the end I found Pankhurst failed to deliver on a premise full of possibility.
The premise: an upper-middle-class professional couple in Washington, DC makes the decision to uproot their family, sell their house, abandon their source of income and their children's education, and move off-grid to live in a commune on the advice of an uncredentialed but charismatic "specialist" who promises to help their autistic daughter.
No spoilers, but, from the outset, any fairly astute reader will know that this is not going to end well, since ending well would obviate the need for a novel-length treatment of this intriguing premise. The ways in which such a scenario could end poorly, however, are manifold, and Parkhurst takes the easy way out by choosing the most extreme and simplistic of these ways, which, to any fairly astute reader, is a total let-down.
She also fails to explain why the parents, Josh and Alexandra Hammond, make the extreme choices described above. There is some vague talk about the ideas of the charismatic specialist, Scott Bean, "helping" the autistic daughter, but we're never told what those ideas are or how they help, beyond stock references to clean living and gluten-free food. Nor are we given any information about what, if any previous treatments failed to help the Hammonds' daughter, thus making their choice to uproot their families' entire lives seem irrational and capricious at best. That would be a plot premise unto itself, but Parkhurst avoids it entirely. She also avoids any mention of how, exactly, the hopeful communards and the others in their cohort are manage to survive at Camp Harmony beyond fleeting mentions of gardening and chicken-keeping.
Most importantly, Parkhurst fails to make a convincing case that the families who follow Scott Bean are actually desperate enough to give up everything, and she neglects to give the reader any insight into Scott Bean's character that would make this choice believable. Add to all of this a virtually complete lack of characterization and a reliance on stereotypes to describe the autistic characters, and what could have been a wonderful novel ends up a hyped and ultimately disappointing read. -
From the prologue, the reader knows that this story will not end well. Additionally, the prologue hints of a disaster involving a charismatic fellow and his devotees. From the novel description, the reader learns the story involves a family with two daughters, one falling on the autism spectrum, and the parent’s devotion to the wisdom of a “self-styled behavior guru”.
Author Carolyn Parkhurst tells her story from the perspectives of the two daughters, Iris and Tilly, and their mother, Alexandra. I’m a big fan of this story telling method as it adds depth to the story while enriching the story with character details. Iris starts the story, explaining that the family is moving to a “camp” from their home in Washington D.C. Iris is a perceptive nine-year-old, who provides the reader with the current story, from her youthful perspective. Her older sister, Tilly, is twelve, and “unique” and very inappropriate according to Iris. Alexandra contributes the back-story. Alexandra’s story is heartbreaking. From Alexandra the reader learns how exhausting, frustrating, time consuming, expensive, and embarrassing it is to have a child who has developmental issues. What I enjoyed most about this novel is what I personally learned from Alexandra’s portions. Parkhurst does a fabulous job getting the reader to ache with Alexandra and feel, truly feel the helplessness and public humiliation that goes with having a child “on the spectrum”. Parkhurst uses Tilly to show how the mind of these special children can operate. As the reader learns, each child is different and diagnosis is fraught with uncertainty. Tilly’s parts are small, but amusing in many ways.
If you ever wondered how any sane person could do what appears to be “crazy” things for the good of their child, this is a read for you. This story shows how easy it is for lives to go awry, when desperation is mixed with hope, even unrealistic hope. This is a wonderful read that sheds light on the complications of parenting a child who falls on the spectrum. I highly recommend this as a moving work that will leave the reader more compassionate. -
The blurb says that it's a book about a desperate family, who turns to the last resort to help their daughter after she is kicked out even from a school for children with special needs. Based on that blurb I was expecting a psychological drama that would explain how the family managed to deal with their situation in the end. Those expectations were completely false. An "unputdownable story" (such a lovely word)? About the strength of love, the bonds of family, and how you survive the unthinkable? Not so much. I had to force myself to read to the end and didn't find there a lot of love or family bonds, just a little pinch here and there. The "unthinkable" is also not all that unthinkable. What is it about? I'm not sure.
Just as promised the book is told from the alternating perspectives of Alexandra and her younger daughter Iris; the first tells a tale placed in 2012 of how they ended up in the camp, the latter is in 2013 and about what happened in the camp. There is also a bit of Tilly-chapters in the mix. The characters are.. strange. I don't know if the author has any first-hand experience with special-needs children, but she totally forgot how to be a normal kid. The chapters told from the perspective of the eleven-years-old girl evoke only one emotion. I don't believe it! A pre-teen girl doesn't think like that. I remember myself, I re-read what my friends and I wrote to each other at that age, and it's completely different, the way of thinking and perceiving the world is different. Iris, on the other hand, sounds like an adult, who pretends to be naive and confused.
My second problem with the book is Alexandra. She's supposed to be desperate and lonely, but sounds... empty, for the lack of a better word. The word clicked into place only on page 185, where "everyone seemed to be terribly in love with their children and not the least bit panicky about the empty hours that stretched ahead after class was over". Yes, right, just the thought a young mother of a yet absolutely normal toddler would have. The character is not exactly flat, it's as if its non-existent. The book doesn't show any sides of Alexandra's character. She doesn't have any hobbies, interests, passions. She sends her daughters to school and spends the time "practicing escapism" (Facebook, video games, you name it). An adult who doesn't like.. anything? There is absolutely nothing in her life except for the escapism. I'm not sure I can imagine a life like that, but ok, probably possible.
The incident that was the last straw before the family moves to the ill-fated camp also seems very far-fetched to me. It starts with Tilly and Alexandra in a park, there is a bunch of random kids there on a school trip. Tilly lies on the ground to take a picture of a statue. Alexandra runs there to "save" her girl from humilation, but too late. Kids start to bully and laugh at her. Really? I did exactly that many times in my life. What's wrong with lying on the ground in search of a better shot? Nobody would even notice. So here again, I don't believe it! Think of Stanislavsky.
I received the book for free through Goodreads Giveaways. All in all, I think it's a solid three. Certainly no more than that. My opinion "may or may not be relevant". -
3.5 stars. What do you do when your child (on the autism spectrum) has been kicked out of all the schools in your area? Desperate to find a place to raise their two girls, the Hammonds are driven to extreme measures and move to Camp Harmony, led by the complicated and charismatic Scott Bean. Harmony is fast-paced and unsettling with convincing characters - especially the children, Tilly and Iris.
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A title like this puts you on edge right away, asking how things might turn out to be unharmonious. Camp Harmony is parenting guru Scott Bean’s brainchild: a New Hampshire getaway for problem children and their families. When the Hammonds leave their Washington, D.C. life behind and set out for Camp Harmony in the early summer of 2012, they’re at the end of their rope with their 13-year-old daughter, Tilly, who’s on the autistic spectrum and has been let go from her special school because of her odd and potentially self-destructive behavior. Alexandra and Josh Hammond hope that Tilly will thrive in a place where most of the kids are like her. Her little sister Iris, 11, who narrates much of the novel, goes with the flow, happy to be one of the “good,” neurotypical hangers-on. Through her eyes we see things turning stranger over the course of six weeks: Scott Bean is supportive and innovative, but he’s also a masterful manipulator. Could Camp Harmony be something of a cult?
I had no idea where Parkhurst would take this story until 10 pages from the end. Her present-tense writing flows effortlessly, moving from Iris’s perspective to Alexandra’s second-person reflections on the years that led them to Scott Bean. The only element I was less than convinced about were the short interludes from Tilly: two-page meditations on what monument to the Hammonds might remain in some future dystopia.
Parkhurst is a great discovery – I first tried her fiction last year with
The Dogs of Babel – and I’ll now read anything she writes. Like Curtis Sittenfeld or Maggie O’Farrell, she toes the line between women’s fiction and literary fiction and writes families perfectly, in prose so smooth you’ll hurtle along in fascination.
Favorite lines:“Here are some of the things you’re not posting on Facebook during February of 2011: Alexandra Moss Hammond has kept her daughter home from school again, because she’s licking the walls and cursing like a sailor.”
of Tilly: “She’s always been a little bit confounding, in all the best and worst ways.”
“Occasionally, someone will ask you if you would change things if you could, but it’s not a question that makes much sense. Your daughter has wings, and without them, she would not be your daughter. This is not the way you thought things would be, but that doesn’t make you wish there were someone else sleeping in her bed.” -
An interesting book about a family dealing with their daughter who is on the autism spectrum. Or as the mother says “ Asperger's is almost right, but it doesn't describe her completely; you also suspect that Tourette’s may play a role, though you haven't really explored it. Labels oversimplify...but they also serve a purpose”. It's fascinating to see how each member of the family deals with the situation. The story is told from alternating points of view between the mother (the back history) and the 11 year old sister (the present). There are also a few chapters from Tilly (the non neurotypical daughter)’s viewpoint as if told from some unknown future. I felt these chapters took you away from the story and were more didactic.
At the beginning, I can't imagine being so out of options that I would move my family to some camp in the middle of nowhere, run by a man with no credentials. But then, Parkhurst does an excellent job of showing how bad it can get. I read some of the sections by the mother and literally cringed. There is a question asked in the book which sums things up “imagine if your child were born with wings. It's a good thing, right?”
The ending was a bit of a letdown. Overall, 3.5 stars.
I received an advance copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. -
A beautifully written story of a family in enough of a crisis to pack it all up and move to the sea of trees, New Hampshire . There they join others with similar struggles in the hope that their ‘guru’ will help them find a new and improved way to parent and be healthy families. In a short period of time ( there are dates at the start of each chapter) we witness the peaks and valleys of this experiment. The ending, which I won’t reveal, was not what I expected. This, and the other surprises along the way keep this book fresh and intriguing. Carolyn Parkhurst knows a great deal about the autism spectrum and human behavior which affords us an honest and heartfelt story. I highly recommend this book.
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After reading an advanced copy of the book, I was angry at the characters especially Alexandra. I have worked with kids like Tilly for ten years and know how hard it is day in and day out. But I can't think a mother would think a camp like this would be a good idea for anyone's children. I know it's a fictional story but it it too close to home. I kept thinking of the things we do and how our behavioral specialist would have had a field day with Scott.
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All the stars. This book. It knows. Glad I read it.
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This one was kindly gifted to me by @willoughbybooks and I was meant to post this as a ‘currently reading’ update but I’m a machine lately and ended up finishing it last night SO, a mini review instead!
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The premise of this book is an unusual one: a family of four decide to up and move to Camp Harmony, a new set up by educational guru Scott Bean which is a camp for families with ‘difficult’ children. Tilly Hammonds is 13 and on the autistic spectrum, and the book explores the family’s dynamics when confronted with Tilly’s ‘increasingly anarchic behaviour’, as the book blurb puts it. Their decision to make such a drastic change to their lives was perhaps a bit outlandish but hey, it’s fiction, I can roll with it - and there’s no denying Scott’s initial charisma.
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I’ve read that Carolyn Parkhurst has two children, one with Asperger’s, and I think you can tell she writes from experience even though it is fiction. She talks about not just the struggles of parenting a child with autism but the joys as well - I particularly loved the sibling relationship between Tilly and Iris, her younger sister.
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Parkhurst’s writing is very strong yet quiet; there’s not a great deal of plot here, it’s more introspective, but I found it a compelling read nonetheless. I didn’t love the mother Alexandra’s chapters as much as much as Iris’s because the use of the second person was jarring, but overall an incredibly engaging and moving read. -
*I received a copy of this from the publisher through a Goodreads giveaway.*
I wasn't enjoying this book and after some deliberation I chose not to force myself to finish it.
I was originally really intrigued by the premise of the story, and especially excited to read a novel exploring the effect having a child on the autistic spectrum has on the parents and the siblings of said child. (One of our close family friends has a child with Autism and watching how this effected their family before and after diagnosis was extremely heart-rending.)
While I could understand what the author was trying to do in the way she constructed her story and how she formed the voices of her characters, this book just really didn't work for me.
WHY:
1. I didn't feel connected with the characters at all. As I read I found I was having more of a detached, analytical response to the narrative rather than an emotive one. This was, I think, largely due to the way the narration changed between the younger daughter Iris (written in the 1st person) and the mother Alexandra (written in the 2nd person). Alexandra's chapters were told as if YOU were her, not HER telling YOU how SHE actually felt from her perspective. All her emotions are projected on to you, presumably to help you understand how she as a parent got to the point of making the drastic decision she makes to uproot her family and move to a family "camp". While I could understand that this was a possible reason for the change in writing style from Alexandra's to Iris's perspectives, it just felt really jarring rather than making a smooth transition from one character's narration to another.
2. This story actually made me feel angry to the point of distraction rather than feeling sympathetic or empathetic. Anger at the parents for uprooting the children and making them feel even more insecure than they already were. Alexandra was acting on a selfish impulse to save her own mental health. (Which is sort-of understandable. The whole family manifests symptoms of anxiety and depression in one form or another due to the extreme strain of trying to live and cope with Tilly's condition. People make desperate decisions to save their sanity sometimes, I get that.) Anger at the way Scott, the leader of the camp, treats the families. Anger at how Josh, Alexandra's husband (who CLEARLY thinks the whole idea of the camp is a load of manure) just goes along with it even though Scott is more and more controlling and weird.
I can't even enumerate all the ways this book was irritating the snot out of me. Cognitively I could tell what the author was trying to convey, what she wanted me to feel. I just never felt connected to things because it was a case of telling you a story but not showing you anything. I just felt at a distance.
It may not have been my cup of tea, but I DO think this book will work for some people, and I DO think it tells you a lot about how Autism effects families.
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Harmony by Carolyn Parkhurst is a very highly recommended, original modern family drama.
Alexandra and Josh Hammond are raising two girls, Tilly, 13, and Iris, 11. They have struggled with the challenges of raising Tilly, who is on the autism spectrum and has officially been diagnosed as PDD-NOS, or "pervasive developmental disorder not otherwise specified." Tilly can be remarkable, but she can also be overwhelming. Alexandra has been talking and getting advice from Scoot Bean, a child development counselor/parenting guru. The Hammond's have decided to sell their home, get rid of most of their possessions, and accept the invitation to join Scott Bean in the establishment of a family camp. Camp Harmony is a wilderness camp located in New Hampshire. More importantly, it is a place that focuses on families with special needs children.
Once they arrive, it seems that Scott, while charismatic, is also much more controlling than they thought he would be. Camp Harmony begins to resemble a cult.
The story is told through three different narrators: Iris, Alexandra, and Tilly. Iris tells the story of what happens at Camp Harmony. Her observations are clear, precise, and very perceptive. She shares details that raise some red flags and help give the reader a reliable and complete picture of Camp Harmony. Alexandra shares the backstory, how she and Josh met, raising the girls, the different struggles they have had with Tilly, and how Scott Bean helped. Tilly has entries written from an unspecified place and time. They are astute, stunning monologues that show the way Tilly thinks and give glimpses into the future of the Hammond family.
I thought this was a brilliant literary novel. The writing is wonderful. The alternating narratives help create a feeling of anticipation and suspense as information slowly builds up and increases the tension. You will be finding yourself reading as fast as you can to find out what happens next. Scott Bean is a character, but he can also stand for an idea, a concept - yet another new way to approach autism.
The narratives also help develop the three lead female characters. They are complex individuals with their own frailty and failings, but also strengths and talents. Parkhurst explores what makes up the fabric of a family bond and the experiences that help cement the relationships. She honestly examines parenting a child on the spectrum, and how that can feel through the eyes of one individual woman.
I totally agree with the reviews that mentioned that Harmony would be a perfect choice for bookclubs. There is more here than the story of a family looking for some help, some answer.
Disclosure: My advanced reading copy was courtesy of the publisher for review purposes. -
Carolyn Parkhurst is a favorite of mine.
Parkhurst approaches difficult topics with a level of wry humor and honesty that can be downright devastating. She writes without much care for whether or not the reader is comfortable, and is adept at forcing the reader to confront the more difficult and extreme sides of human nature. In this case, she writes about the difficulty of raising a child on the autism spectrum - the unknowns, the unpredictability, the love, and the frustration. She writes about the isolation mental illness forces you to live with, and how magnified it is when the one with the mental illness is your child.
Is this somehow your fault?
On top of all of this, in true Parkhurst fashion, is an entire other mystery.
Driven to the limit, the family joins a family camp/retreat designed by parenting guru Scott Bean. Here they will live in the wilderness, apart from modern society, in the hopes that the consistency and work will help the 'difficult' children begin to adjust. And it does seem to be working. But is Scott what he seems?
This book is difficult to quantify, but man did I gobble it up. It was exciting, well written, and illuminating. It asked questions that everyone is likely uncomfortable acknowledging, let alone answering.
How much do we really know about these mental disorders? How much do we know for sure? How much are we doing wrong? Can good things come out of terrible situations, and how uncomfortable is that to imagine? -
I am an avid reader. The books I read are about evenly divided between my kindle and audiobooks (as well as the occasional book book). There are some books that translate perfectly to the listening experience and Harmony by Carolyn Parkhurst was such a book. In a broad way it's about what you come to see more and more to be, a cult. But it's not a cult in the traditional way where the leader has to slowly convince the participants to drink his cool aid, because these particular participants are at their wits end in dealing with children who are on the autistic spectrum. And this leader truly has insight into the kids and their families. In fact the real meat of the book is about what it means to be a family who has a child with special needs. Special does not necessarily only mean difficult behaviors, rather it also means remarkable, unique, exceptional. The book resonated with me as a Speech Pathologist in Early Intervention and as a parent and simply as a human being.
I find it difficult using Goodread's rating system. So many books fall in-between the whole numbers. I give Harmony a 3-1/2. It's not quite a 4, which for me is a great book, an excellent book, but it's more than a 3, which is the rating I give most of the books I read and consider good to very good, but not great. -
This the story of a families journey living with a daughter who is not typical, "on the spectrum."
The author does a good job at conveying and demonstrating that each and every individual labelled as "on the spectrum" is different. What works for one individual may not work for another.
I love how the family grew, and how this was similar in ways to what the parents of the individuals I work for have told me of their own journeys.
I received a copy of this in exchange for an honest review. -
Loved this story
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I have really enjoyed Parkhurst's other novels, especially The Dogs of Babel, but this one fell flat for me (2.5 stars).
-I liked the epilogue about wings, but it did NOT feel authentic to Alexandra's parenting style. I don't understand why it was placed at the end when she seemed to make little progress in developing a greater appreciation for Tilly's positive qualities. It just didn't ring true.
-Alexandra and her husband (I've already forgotten his name...) seemed to have an unrealistically ideal marriage, considering how challenging it is to effectively co-parent a child with special needs.
-The second person in Alexandra's chapters? Completely unnecessary, in my opinion. Made her self-pity that much more intolerable.
-What a disappointing ending of the big secret behind Scott Bean. You mean cultish figures are not popular with everybody and they may be hiding some insecurities? Clearly, there was an attempt to offer some mis-direction, what with the hints about pedophilia, but really he just seemed to be a weird guy with anger management problems. (Or did I miss something about the pedophilia?)
-I did like both the character of Iris and the performance of the voice actor who read her chapters. -
Last week I wrote a review of a book about a family with a son on the spectrum, observing that it seems all in such books I'd read it was a father dealing with a son with the condition. Here, a daughter's condition provides the cause for a family to uproot itself, sell all, and move from Washington DC to a New Hampshire lakeside camp purported to promote understanding among such families. Told from the viewpoint of the women in the family, it gives an entirely new slant as to what it means. Thirteen-year-old Tillie is diagnosed with PDD-NOS, meaning she is on the scale. The sections she narrates are so well done, it is haunting. Iris, her eleven-year-old sister whose journal provides the plot's backbone, struggling with her growing awareness and position as the "good kid" in the group. But it is Alexandra, the mother, who provides the most illuminating response. By narrating in the second person, Alexandra vividly embodies what it means to be a mother of a challenging child, how to weigh the conflict of love and hope for understanding necessary for such demands, thus providing the heart of the book.
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A stunning look at what it means to be a parent -- the choices we make and how they impact our families and children. Harmony is about a family with an autistic child and the lengths they will go to create and find a nurturing environment for their daughter. For the Hammond family, it means leaving behind everything they know for an utopian camp run by a child behavior guru. Told through alternating perspectives of mother and daughter, Harmony shows us just how far we will go for family and what exactly is "normal."
Do yourself a favor and read this book. -
I absolutely adored this novel. Deftly told, deeply nuanced, and utterly riveting, HARMONY is the story of one family's desperate struggle to come together without tearing apart. I can't recommend this wonderful book strongly enough.
