Beginning to Heal by Ellen Bass

Beginning to Heal Reviews

• 
  Heidi

  This book was the miracle of all miracles. As I was reading, I swear I was able to feel weight lifted off my shoulders. I loved the concept of the author talking to the reader and reassuring them. The separate sections that focus on a certain topic made this book easy to read.
  
  I don't want this to be my regular boring ass review because this is something that's so important to me. This is actually the closest thing to help I've gotten in the years following my sexual abuse.
  
  I'm about to get personal so TW: sexual abuse
  
  Just a little background, I was sexually abused when I was around 10 or 11 years old. I'm not 100% sure how old I was but I know for certain that I was in 5th grade. The man that sexually abused me was my sibling's godfather and a close family friend. It lasted for a few months but it totally messed me up in the years to come.
  
  I always assumed that once the abuse was over I would somehow feel better but instead of getting better, things got worse. Anger, sadness, and hopelessness were consistent throughout the years. I think that all had to do with the fact that nothing ever happened to him. His actions didn't seem to garner him any consequences. He got away with sexually abusing me, living his life care-free, while I was forced to live with what he had done to me.
  
  But this book was of great help in order to help me heal, regardless if it's been almost 10 years or not, I'm so thankful for this book. The amount of times I cried throughout the book is just too many to count. I think I'll talk about the sections that really helped.
  
  For starters, Healing is Possible helped me realize that my sexual abuse is valid even if it isn't as bad as other people's. "The fact that someone else has suffered from abuse that was worse than yours does not lessen your suffering" It forced me to see that I was always saying " oh I can't really be suffering because it wasn't as bad as the experience of other's" but there's a point where I just have to admit that I did suffer, and it does count.
  
  In The Decision to Heal I liked that they continuously stated that people can't heal alone. That the silence needs to be broken and reach out to others for support. It was only 2 years ago when I finally spoke to my friends about it because before that, only my family knew what had happened. Telling them what had happened to me made me feel better, it felt as if my chest had been tightened and the pressure was released.
  
  Beginning to Heal showed me that I was guilty of denying it happened. During my freshman year in high school, I tried to forget that ever happened. I kept repeating that I didn't get sexually abused and just tried to go about my day. I kept trying to tell myself that it didn't happen, maybe I had imagined it or something. But I now realize that I have to face the truth, something I've tried to hide from everyone and myself for so many years. Maybe that could help me heal.
  
  I absolutely loved when they said that it's not necessary to forgive the abuser. I always hear "You have to forgive him in order for you to move on" and I always felt like that a bowl of shit. Instead, they say that the only person people need to forgive is themselves. I've come to terms that I need to forgive myself because I always blamed myself for something that was not my fault.
  
  This book is a blessing in my life and I think it's one that I'll keep re-reading often in order for me to accept the abuse and not let it affect me the way it's currently affecting me.
• 
  Tyshawn Knight

  If you are coping with a past and must begin your journey to healing alone then start with this book. It is written by women who understand from the point of view of understanding. At times it is blunt other times it is frank, all the time it helps.
• 
  Frenchie Haze

  I started reading this book around February 2014. I had been struggling with being a 20 year survivor and I was tired of letting the guilt and shame control my life. I researched several books to begin my healing journey, and decided to give this one a try first based on the many reviews I read on several sites. THIS BOOK IS GOD SENT! I cannot begin to show my gratitude! This book gave me the courage to not only admit and acknowledge to myself the pain I skillfully buried away for years, but it also gave me to courage to tell someone about my past. I never knew that holding such a painful secret in my whole life weighed so heavily on me. I definitely want to add this book to my personal collection to reference in time of need. I would recommend this book to anyone interested in healing but confused on where to start. Although the book is relatively short, it took several weeks for me to complete it. Some parts brought up memories and emotions I was not ready to face but the authors encourage you to read at your own pace. My healing journey has just begun and honestly might not ever be complete...but this book gave me something I thought I'd lost forever...HOPE.
• 
  Marilia

  Was recommended this book as part of my counselling degree to better understand clients with childhood trauma that derived from sexual assault. It was a short but intriguing albeit sad read with plenty of examples of survivors.
• 
  Shaina

  Another very powerful and impactful internship read that can serve as a great tool for survivors of childhood sexual abuse
• 
  Angie

  perfect beginner book for any survivor starting out the therapy/healing process. I recommend it to many of my clients.
• 
  Abeer

  كتاب حجمه وصغير لكنه مؤلم جدا
• 
  Aya

  ملهم بحق.. رائع بحق..
  ممتنة له كثيراً ..
• 
  Angel Graham

  A small book, that I have found is perfect for giving to supporters of those of us in recovery from Child Sexual Abuse. It hits the hi-lights of the BIG BOOK, Courage to Heal, without being so overwhelming. I've given a copy to 3 people so far and each has said this helped them to understand how best to help me, and others they know who are survivors.
• 
  Durwin Foster

  I have recommended this book to female clients when they have entrusted me with the honor of working with them around sexual abuse -- their clear choice as i always offer that they may want a female counsellor.